Space (Laws of Physics #2)(35)

“Gone, and she took all her sweet softness with her.

Gone, and emptiness takes a shape.

Gone, and summer is winter.

Gone, and I sleep.

But when she’s here, I’m finally awake.

A barren landscape,

Now beauty in her wake.”

After Kaitlyn read the poem aloud, silence followed. My friend frowned at the page, and then lifted her gray eyes to mine. They moved over me, searching, thoughtful. But she said nothing.

“Damn, Abram.” Charlie hit my shoulder with a drumstick. “That’s some beautiful, deep shit. When’d you write that?”

I cleared my throat, glancing at our drummer. “About two years ago.” Two years, four months, eighteen days.

“How come we didn’t use it for this album?” Ruthie reached for the notebook and Kaitlyn handed it over.

I shrugged, standing, and searched for my guitar, wanting to do something other than shrug. I did too much shrugging these days.

“Have you guys seen my guitar?” It wasn’t where I remembered leaving it. Strange.

But if I hadn’t stood up to search for my guitar, I wouldn’t have seen Mona, Allyn, Leo, and a few others walking down the hall toward the kitchen. Stopping short, I stared at them. They were all dressed in snow gear, carrying sleds. Mona had a thick length of rope hanging from her elbow, coiled in a big circle. Leo was struggling under the weight of two large pulleys.

When did she come downstairs? Why now? Did I miss her at breakfast? Was she okay?

Stop wondering about her.

Before I could think or react, Charlie appeared at my shoulder. “It’s not here? I swear I saw you put it here by the—oh. Oh, hey!” Charlie jogged forward upon catching sight of the group, placing himself in front of Mona. “Hey. Hey there.”

“Hello,” she said, stopping. They all stopped.

“I’m Charlie.” He held out his hand, grinning down at her, his voice sounding strange (for Charlie).

“I’m Mona.”

“I’m so glad to see you.” Charlie shuffled closer and grinned down at her in a way I’d never seen him grin at anyone, and I’d known Charlie for going on ten years.

My attention dropped to where she juggled the rope and accepted his handshake with a quick and firm up-down movement. Her arm moved like she was pulling back and his arm followed, his fingers keeping hold of hers.

Flexing my jaw, I lifted my attention from their hands. Charlie was still grinning, and Mona was smiling politely, and I wanted to break his face. I wouldn’t do it, but I wanted to break his face, and that was just the way it was.

Leo, God bless Leo, cleared his throat, set down the pulleys, and stepped between them. “You met Mona already, remember? Two nights ago?” When he spoke, I noticed his voice was a little rough, nasally, like he was getting sick or had allergies.

“You were very tired.” My drummer continued speaking to Mona, but finally released her hand. He wasn’t ceding much room to Leo, leaning over our mutual friend to address his sister. “Where are you going? Outside? Are you having dinner with us tonight?”

My feet moved me toward the group and I nodded at Jenny Vee, Connie Will, and Nicole Mac. The three of them, friends of Leo’s, made up the indie rock band, Fin, and seemed to be generally talented, cool, and low-key. Like Kaitlyn and Ruthie, their partners/boyfriends/husbands were supposed to join us yesterday but were stuck in town due to the snow.

And then I looked at Mona.

Her eyes were on me, but her smile had fallen, and she looked pale. Not pale like before, where all the color had suddenly left her face, but pale like she’d been sick for a while. Her eyes were dim, shuddered, bracing, restrained, and seeing her this way had my chest tightening. A hot, restive remorse made my stomach twist. I didn’t like it.

“I, uh, yes. We’re going outside,” she said softly, her wary gaze still on me.

“We’re going sledding.” Leo lifted the two pulleys with effort, finally forcing Charlie to step back. “If you guys want to come, you’re welcome. But we only have five sleds and they’re all spoken for. You’ll need to do some sweet talking if you want to share.”

“There’s six of you.” I glanced at Leo briefly, unable to keep my eyes from moving back to Mona’s.

“Allyn and I are sharing.” Leo grinned at Mona’s friend. She grinned back.

“I’ll share with Mona,” Charlie said, skipping away quickly, like he was in a rush. “Let me go put on my stuff.”

“I don’t think so—” Leo didn’t finish his thought as he was forced to cover his mouth to catch a sneeze.

Charlie turned and jogged toward the main floor bedrooms, calling back to us, “Come on, man. It’ll be fine. She doesn’t mind. I’ll be right there.”

Leo lifted his voice, sniffing. “No, listen. She won’t—” he cut himself off, sneezing again, and then making a sound of frustration. Leo glanced at his sister. “Sorry.”

She gave him a tight smile. “It’s fine. Don’t make it a big thing.”

“He can share mine,” Jenny Vee offered, giving Mona a big grin. “I don’t mind.”

“He’ll share Jenny’s and he can deal with it,” Leo said firmly.

What is the deal with this sled? I half expected it to be named Rosebud.