Sisters by Choice (Blackberry Island #4)(38)

Her completely competent, unrufflable cousin flushed. “I don’t want to talk about this. There’s a reason I never talked about it.”

“You weren’t raped, were you? Please tell me it wasn’t that.”

“It wasn’t. I swear. It was just ninety really lame seconds in the back of a truck. I was young and stupid and he was...” She sighed. “Let’s change the subject.”

Kristine genuinely didn’t understand. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“Nothing.”

“What?”

Sophie glared at her. “Stop asking me.”

“Sophie Jean Lane, you tell me right now.”

“It was Jaxsen.” Sophie groaned. “I’m sorry. It was way before you two got together. Like months and months. I was going to tell you but I was embarrassed about being so stupid. Then you started dating and it seemed weird and then I forgot. I’m sorry it ever happened. Believe me, I’m sorry.”

“Oh.”

It was all she could manage. The single syllable. Because nothing Sophie said made sense. She had to be talking about someone else. Jaxsen hadn’t slept with Sophie. She knew he hadn’t, because he’d told her she was his first.

She remembered everything about that time. She had been resisting going all the way with him for at least two months, refusing to be yet another conquest. He’d finally admitted that the stories about him were exaggerated. They would be each other’s first time. He’d looked into her eyes and had told her he loved her. That he would always love her. It was the moment she’d known he was the one. That they would get married and live happily ever after. And she’d been right. Or so she’d thought.

“So you were his first,” she whispered.

“What? No. Not even close.” Sophie slapped her hand over her mouth. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

Kristine felt herself disconnecting from her body. She had to in order to survive the moment. “The rumors about him weren’t rumors, were they?”

Sophie threw herself facedown on the sofa. “Don’t ask me that.”

Which was all the answer Kristine needed. There was a rushing sound in her ears. Her stomach churned until she was afraid she was going to throw up her dinner.

Jaxsen had lied to her. He’d lied. She’d thought their first time together had meant something to both of them. She’d given him her virginity and her heart, but to him she’d only been another piece of ass. It was all a lie.

“I’m sorry,” Sophie told her, sitting up and looking miserable. “I’m really sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not.”

Kristine looked at Sophie. “You were right. We weren’t even together when it happened.”

“I know, but still. It’s weird and I love you and I’m a horrible person and I’m sorry.”

Sophie wasn’t the one who had broken her heart and betrayed her trust. Sophie hadn’t done anything wrong.

“I’m fine,” she lied. “I swear.” Lie number two. She was going to hell for sure.

She managed to participate in the conversation for a few minutes, then she told Sophie she had to get home. Once she was alone in her house, she walked into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed. The rational side of her brain told her it was no big deal. It had been years ago and she and Jaxsen had a strong, happy relationship. But the rest of her, the heart of her, felt betrayed and shattered. If he’d lied about that, what else wasn’t true?



Chapter Eleven


The boys and Jaxsen arrived home early afternoon on Sunday. Kristine hadn’t slept well the night before. She’d awakened to find three texts from Sophie apologizing and had called her to assure her all was well, then had spent the rest of the morning alternately looking forward to seeing her sons and dreading having to speak to Jaxsen. What was she supposed to do or say? Pretend it hadn’t happened? Pretend she didn’t know? Confront him? There was no good answer and she was still unsure of herself when the SUV pulled into the driveway.

The boys piled out and raced to the house.

“Mom! Mom!”

All three of them burst into the kitchen and ran toward her, arms outstretched.

She started laughing and hugging them, aware they were dirty and smelled and yet she couldn’t be happier to see them. They hung on as if they would never let go, even JJ, who sometimes pulled back when she tried to be affectionate with him.

“How was it?” she asked.

“We had a great time.”

“We went fishing and Tommy fell out of the boat.”

“Did not.”

“Did, too.”

“JJ and I were wrestling and he pushed me.”

“I didn’t push you.”

Jaxsen walked into the kitchen and dropped several duffel bags on the floor. “I believe it’s my turn with Mom. Why don’t you three take your bags to the laundry room and empty them there, then help me get the rest of the gear out of the car?”

The boys grumbled a little but let go of her to do what he said. Grant lingered the longest. Kristine brushed his too-long hair out of his eyes.

“I’m making lasagna tonight,” she told him.

He grinned. “Thanks, Mom.”