Shoot First(Stone Barrington #45)(8)
“Whatever you’re having.”
Stone picked up the phone and buzzed Anna in the kitchen. “The usual,” he said, “but for two.”
“You are very hungry today,” Anna replied.
“Two plates, please.” He hung up and turned to Meg. “What would you like to do until breakfast arrives?”
“Watch TV,” she replied. “Ask me again after breakfast.” She fell back onto the bed.
Stone turned on Morning Joe.
* * *
—
AFTER THE BREAKFAST DISHES had been removed from the bed, Stone asked Meg again, and she made a different suggestion. After he had respected her wishes and cooled down, Stone excused himself and picked up the phone.
“The Barrington Practice,” Joan said, “sometimes known as Woodman & Weld.”
“It’s me,” he said.
“I know, I recognized your breathing.”
“Who owns the rental house in Key West?”
“It’s the rental agents’ policy not to reveal the name of the owners. I think they’re afraid that, next time, you’ll call them direct.”
“Please call them and ask if the house is for sale.”
“I don’t need to call them, they told me at the outset that it was for sale.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t want to set you off on another house-buying jag.”
“I buy houses one at a time, not in jags. How much are they asking?”
Joan told him.
“Offer them twenty-five percent less, and tell them I won’t consider a counteroffer, just yes or no.”
“Whatever you say, boss.”
“Call me back when you have the owner’s answer.”
“Roger.” They hung up.
“You’re going to buy the house?” Meg asked.
“No, I’ve offered them too little, and when they turn me down I’ll forget about it. It’s how I keep from buying too many houses.”
“Your mind works in weird ways.”
“What’s weird about that?”
“It’s weird to make an offer for a house you don’t want.”
“I suppose it’s a little unusual, but I wouldn’t go as far as weird.”
“Trust me, it’s weird,” she said. “Where do you presently have houses?”
“In Los Angeles, Paris, London, and the south of England.”
“How about New York?”
“Yes, in New York. Oh, and Maine—I forgot Maine.”
“Why so many houses?”
“I don’t like hotels, so when I go somewhere I like, I’d rather stay at home. But I like my houses to be run like hotels.”
Meg shook her head. “This just gets weirder and weirder.”
“How long have you been a billionaire?” Stone asked.
“A few months.”
“How many houses have you bought since then?”
“Only one.”
“But now you’re shopping for something in New York?”
“Yes, but that will only make two.”
“And you think you’ll be finished when you have two houses?”
“Well,” she said, “I think I might like a place in Ireland.”
“Where else?”
“Maybe the South of France.”
“All right, you’re up to four houses.”
“But I haven’t bought that many.”
“Only because you haven’t had time,” Stone said. “Stick around.”
The phone rang. “Hello?”
“It’s Joan. They’ve accepted your offer.”
“What?”
“You’ve just bought yourself another house.”
“They accepted twenty-five percent off the ask?”
“Yes, and that includes the car and the golf cart, too.”
“When do they want to close?”
“Today,” she said.
“Nobody closes today.”
“They said that Jack Spottswood has all the paperwork ready to go. You can go in anytime today and sign the documents. I’ll wire the funds right away. Anything else?”
“I can’t think of anything,” Stone muttered.
“Good. I’ll get the utilities transferred to your name as soon as you have title.”
“Thank you,” Stone said weakly, then hung up.
“I take it you’ve just bought another house,” Meg said.
“I didn’t mean to,” Stone said. “It was an accident.”
“Any psychiatrist will tell you there are no accidents. In this case, you made an offer, and they accepted. It’s really hard to buy a house accidentally.”
“I didn’t even have it inspected. What if it has termites? I’ve heard they have termites in Key West.”
“You can have it inspected, and if you have termites, you can have it tented.”
“What’s that?”
“They throw a big tent over the place, run you out, and pump a lot of termite-killing stuff into the tent. Takes about a day.”