Sempre (Forever Series #1)(66)

* * *

After Celia left, Haven headed for the door when Carmine burst into the room, holding a small present. He headed straight for her, no hesitation in his steps. He caught her off guard, and she took a step away, the backs of her knees hitting the bed.

He stopped in front of her, forcing the gift into her trembling hand. “Open it.”

It was hard for her to find a spot to start since he had used so much tape, but she managed to tear a corner. After the paper was off, she stared at the thick blue book with Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary and Thesaurus written on the front. “This is for me?”

“Yeah,” he said. “I remember you said you needed a thesaurus. And I know you were joking, but I thought, you know . . . it might be useful or whatever.” He sighed. “I suck at this gift thing.”

She stared at him as he rambled, realizing he was nervous. “Thank you.”

“It’s not what I wish I could give you . . .”

“It’s great, Carmine.”

She walked to the other side of the bed and briefly reconsidered what she was doing, but he’d put himself out there and she wanted to do the same. “I drew something for you.”

A smile spread over his face. “I thought you forgot our deal.”

“I never forget things.”

He chuckled, all trace of nervousness gone, even though hers had skyrocketed. “I’ll keep that in mind later when I f**k up.”

Opening the drawer on the stand, she pulled out a piece of paper and held it so he couldn’t see. “It’s, uh . . . it’s not that great.”

He held out his hand. “I’m sure it’s wonderful.”

Resigned that it was too late to back out, Haven handed him the drawing. She swallowed a few times, trying to push back her nerves as she sat beside him. Besides her mama, no one had ever seen anything she drew. Carmine’s silence as he stared at it flustered her. “I told you it wasn’t good.”

“Tesoro, this is amazing! I’m speechless, and you think it sucks?”

She glanced at the picture in his hand. Although she’d never seen one in person, she’d looked up a hummingbird in a book in the library. It was the only sketch she’d made that looked right to her. “Really?”

He laughed. “Yes, really. This is the best thing anyone’s ever done for me. I told you I wanted you for Christmas, and you gave it to me. This is beautiful. You’re beautiful, colibri.”

* * *

Haven stood frozen in the family room as she stared out the window. The backyard was encased in a thin layer of white, thick flakes continuing to fall from the sky like confetti.

“We don’t get much snow around here,” Carmine said. “It never lasts long, but it’s nice.”

To her, nice didn’t begin to cover it. It was beautiful. She walked to the window and pressed her hand to the frosty glass, her stomach fluttering as her eyes burned with tears. She thought of her mama then, the vision of her dancing in the snow. It was her happy spot, the place she went whenever she dreamed. Haven understood now. She yearned to go there, too.

A throat cleared behind her, and she turned to see that everyone had gathered. Dozens of presents of all shapes and sizes huddled under the fake tree, decorated in shiny paper with big bows. Haven sat on the couch, her nerves flaring as she gazed at them. Carmine hesitated but sat down beside her.

Dr. DeMarco handed out presents, and Haven was stunned when he set two in front of her. Dominic’s name was written on the top one, and she glanced at the second to see unfamiliar handwriting. “Celia,” Carmine said, the same time Haven read the name on the tag.

The gift from Dominic was filled with art supplies, paints and paper and markers, while Celia’s box contained an empty picture frame. Overwhelmed by their generosity, Haven could do nothing but whisper her thanks. She felt almost normal as she watched the others with their gifts, like she was simply a girl enjoying the small things in life. It warmed her heart to feel like a part of them.

Despite that, there was still that other part of her that felt guilty. As she gazed around at the living room littered with wrapping paper and plates of cookies, she felt like she was betraying her mama. There would be no gifts for her. No sweets. No laughs. No family. No snow. No love.

She had been so lost in thought that she hadn’t noticed the room emptied until Carmine squeezed her knee. She jumped, startled, and he looked at her questioningly. “What’s wrong?”

“Just thinking about my mama.”

Carmine put his arm around her, pulling her to him. “I miss mine, too.”

* * *

Tess and Dia showed up a few minutes later, and everyone gathered in the family room once again while Haven lingered by the doorway. Dr. DeMarco and his sister laughed together over some whispered secret, and Tess sat on Dominic’s lap as he squeezed her in a hug. Dia was telling a story, making Carmine chuckle. The love in the room was so pure and powerful that Haven’s eyes misted from the intensity of it.

Carmine spotted her and patted the cushion beside him. “Why are you standing there?”

“Habit, I guess,” she said. “I’m used to being on the outside looking in.”

“Well, we’re gonna break that habit. You belong on the inside with me.”

She gazed at him, smiling, before looking over his shoulder. A pair of dark eyes met hers, the penetrating gaze paralyzing. Dr. DeMarco was watching them, and he didn’t look happy anymore.