Sempre (Forever Series #1)(135)

That knowledge made it feel like the ground was moving.

* * *

Haven was in her room that afternoon when Carmine came in, clutching a large white envelope. “You have mail, tesoro.”

She eyed him warily as he sat on the edge of the bed, handing the mail to her. The return address was from North Carolina Community Colleges. “Is this . . . ?”

“Your test results.”

She stared at the envelope as she ran her finger along the seal.

“Are you gonna open it or what?”

The enthusiasm in Carmine’s voice frazzled her. It was the first time she had put herself out there, and the thought of failing scared her. “Can you do it for me?”

He shook his head. “You should do it.”

She carefully tore the flap and pulled out the paper. The actual scores meant nothing to her as she stared at the certificate attached to the transcript, the words HIGH SCHOOL EQUIVALENCY DIPLOMA etched along the top with a golden seal.

“I passed?” she asked, trying to hold back the excitement threatening to burst forth, but it was stronger than her. She threw herself at Carmine before he could get out a word, knocking him over. “I passed!”

“You did,” he said. “Can’t say I’m surprised. I knew you would.”

He kissed her slowly, softly, pure passion emanating from him. It was an innocent kiss, yet so much more. It was a kiss of redemption, of forgiveness and pride. It was a kiss that said no matter what may have happened in the past, there was still hope for the future.

Hope. It was a feeling she reveled in now, instead of cowering from as before. “Thank you for believing in me,” she whispered against his mouth.

“You don’t have to thank me,” he said, pulling back with a smile. “And don’t worry, because everything will work out. We’re one step closer. You can go to college now.”

“What about you? When are you going to test for college?”

“Soon,” he said. “I signed up before we went to California.”

“Are you excited?”

He chuckled. “I wouldn’t call the SATs thrilling, tesoro. I’m just ready to get it over with. I need to fill out applications, so we need to figure out where we’re going . . . especially if I’m gonna try to play football. California? New York? Camelot? Emerald City? Take your pick.”

She had no idea where half of those places were. “I don’t know.”

“Well, think about it, okay? But not today. Today’s for celebrating, not thinking. Look at where you were a year ago and look at you now. You’re free, you have a degree, and we’re in love and gonna make it through this shit even if it kills us.” He paused, his brow furrowing as she laughed. “Yeah, that didn’t make sense, but you get what I’m saying. We haven’t had a reason to celebrate in a while, so come on, get up, put on some decent clothes, and let’s forget about all of this for a while and be. We don’t get to just be enough.”

She glanced down at the black pants and Durante High School football shirt she wore. “What’s wrong with my clothes?”

“Everything I said and all you got from that is me telling you to change?” he asked with amusement, pulling her to her feet. “Change. Clothes, not you. I don’t want you to ever change, but I’m kinda tired of looking at that f**king shirt.”

“I like this shirt,” she said defensively, his laughter filtering back in as he left the room.

45

Haven stayed busy during the days when Carmine was at school, but it was difficult for her not to dwell on things when alone. Guilt continued to gnaw away at her.

She awoke the third Saturday in September as Carmine got out of the shower. She lay still in bed and watched him as he tried his best not to disturb her. He stood in front of the closet, and even in the semidarkened room, she could make out the definition of his back muscles and the lines of his tattoos. His skin glowed in the faint light filtering in from the open bathroom door, mesmerizing her. Even his scar shimmied as he absentmindedly rubbed it.

If there was one image of Carmine DeMarco she never wanted to forget, it was this one—him exposed and vulnerable, sneaking around his own bedroom in the dark. It was something few would ever see, but it was an image she couldn’t bear to lose. Most people knew the selfish young boy, spoiled and irresponsible, but she was lucky enough to see Carmine for who he truly was. Completely stripped down to the core, a gentle soul despite his scarred exterior.

The quiet contentment he oozed when he thought no one was watching took her breath away. She loved him with every fiber of her being, and just the fact that, after everything, he could still stand in front of her as he was spoke volumes.

He sighed and slipped on some clothes before grabbing a pair of Nikes from his closet. He kicked the corner of the bed as he walked by and cursed profusely under his breath. Haven tried to stifle her laughter but failed, his head snapping in her direction when he heard her.

“How long have you been awake?” he asked, sitting down to slip on the shoes.

“A few minutes.”

“And you were what, watching me get dressed?” He playfully nudged her with his elbow. She blushed, hoping he couldn’t see it in the darkness, but nothing escaped his notice. “Yeah, you were.”

“I couldn’t help it. You’re too beautiful not to watch.”