Satin Princess(36)

“It was over a long fucking time ago, Jessa.”

“But legally speaking, I’m saying.”

“Legally?” I scoff. “Doesn’t mean shit to me.”

“I guess it wouldn’t matter, anyway,” she mumbles. Then she adds something else that’s almost too inaudible for me to hear: “… if you didn’t want to remarry.”

I haven’t even thought about the possibility of remarrying. It seems… less crazy now than it once did.

“Why did you agree to marry Dane?” I ask.

She looks confused, as though she isn’t really even sure. Or maybe I’m just asking a question she’s spent months asking herself. “I guess because… I always wanted to get married.”

“So you just said yes to the first man who asked?”

She squirms uncomfortably. “It sounds horrible when you put it like that.”

“Should I try another way?”

“Don’t be an ass.”

I suppress a smile and wait for her to finish her explanation.

“We’d been dating for a while,” she says softly. “He was a good boyfriend. Honestly, he was. He was charming and funny. And there were times he could be sweet. I don’t know, at the time it seemed like a no-brainer. It was only later that I started seeing that maybe all the things I thought were positives may have just been distractions.”

“Have you spoken to him since the wedding?”

“I sent him this long email,” she divulges. “It was essentially a breakup letter. I wrote it more for my sake than his. I needed closure.”

“And did he write back?”

“Yes. Basically, he didn’t respond to anything in my letter. He just said we needed to meet face to face so that we could sort things out. I ignored it.”

“Nothing after that?”

“I blocked him on my phone. So, no.”

I nod. “Good choice. Strong.”

She smiles. “You think so?”

“In my experience, not many women can walk away with such finality. It takes courage.”

“I appreciate you saying that. My mom thinks I made a mistake by not forgiving him,” she admits. “My dad told me that he would support whatever decision I made. But I know him well enough to know that he wasn’t happy, either. Although that might just have been a reaction to the fact that he had blown a bunch of cash on a wedding that didn’t actually happen.”

“They don’t sound like they know you very well.”

“Maybe not,” she says with a disappointed little sigh. “We don’t have very much in common.” She glances up at me. “Did you ever feel that way in your family? Out of place, I mean. Like you didn’t really belong.”

“I’ve never thought about it before.”

“So that’s a no.”

I suppress a smirk. “This is what I was meant for, Jessa. My father felt the same. And even Yulian loves it.”

“You… love it?” she asks tentatively.

“What’s not to love?” I ask. “I call the shots. I create the life I want. Sure, there are a few… occupational hazards. But that comes with the territory.”

“I don’t know if I could ever have that mindset.”

“Trust me—if you live in the underworld long enough, you’ll find a way to deal with the devils.”

Her expression turns thoughtful. I can tell she’s juggling a dozen different thoughts in that pretty little head of hers. But she doesn’t let me in on what they are. Eventually, her eyelids start to get heavy, and I watch as she slowly fades to sleep.

“I didn’t love…” The murmur is soft but intelligible. Her eyes are closed, so I don’t know that she’s even aware of the fact that she’s talking.

“Hm?”

“I didn’t love Dane,” she mumbles. “And he still broke my heart a little. I don’t think I could take it… if you… if you…”

She yawns and I think I’m about to lose her to sleep, but she continues.

“… if you break my heart.”

“Are you scared of that?”

“Mhmm…”

“Why?”

“Because… because…” she murmurs, twisting her face into my chest. “I love you.”

I’m expecting it, I saw it coming from a mile away, and still, it floors me. By the time I recover from the revelation and look down at her, she’s deep asleep and breathing as easily as I’ve ever heard from her. Like she finally lifted an impossible weight off her shoulders.

I unravel her hands from my body and slip out from underneath her just in time to see the door open slightly.

It’s one of my guys.

“Don Stepanov,” he whispers. “Your brother and Lev have just arrived.”





13





ANTON





Yulian and Lev are both waiting for me in the sitting room, a wall of windows behind them showcasing the view. It’s so clean that I almost feel like I could give someone the tiniest push and they’d go right through as if the glass didn’t even exist.

When I look at my brother, I’m genuinely tempted.