Running Wild(Wild #3)(71)

Jonah’s face twists. “Christ, Lehr, you’re bringin’ a lot of drama with you today. Poor guy, though. That’s gotta be rough.” He works his fingers through his beard in thought. “So, you wait. Get to know him. Be friends, and when he’s ready—”

I burst out with mirthless laughter. “And when he’s ready for a relationship, he’ll decide that I’m the one for him? Gee, where have I heard this before?” Oh yeah, that was me, convincing myself of that brilliant plan for years. “No thanks. I’m thirty-eight. You think when he gets over her, he’s not going to be looking for someone younger than him?” Someone who won’t be in her sixties when their child is twenty? If she can even have a child by then? “I don’t have time for the wait-and-see game. I’ve been there, done that, and I am never putting myself through it again.”

The second the words are out, I regret them.

We’ve never openly addressed the elephant in the room. I don’t think Jonah’s ever seen it. At least, I’ve convinced myself of that because it’s easier for my pride that way. But I’ve seen the elephant, stomping around with a trumpet affixed to its trunk, just in case it needed more attention.

Jonah takes a deep breath, as if preparing himself to unload words he was hoping he’d never have to say.

And I’m suddenly terrified that, above all else, I’m about to lose my best friend. That storm, I cannot weather. “Jonah, I—”

“No.” He puts up a hand to stop me. “First off, plenty of women have babies in their forties, so stop thinkin’ that you can’t. And I know things may not have worked out how you saw them going.” He swallows. “But I only ever want to see you as happy as I am with Calla.”

“I truly am so glad you found her. You two are perfect for each other.”

“We are, aren’t we?” He smiles wistfully. “Honestly? I never thought I could be this happy. It’s like she was made just for me.”

I watch the truck pull onto the main road and speed off toward the entrance to Nancy Lake. In another world, I wonder if Tyler might have been made for me.

But in this world, it’s beginning to feel like I’m on my own.

“Hey, you feel like going for a ride tomorrow? Just you and me. Hit up some villages for old times’ sake? Play with some strays?”

I laugh. “Actually, I could use an escape from everything right about now.”

For old times’ sake.





CHAPTER EIGHTEEN





“You wanna borrow the cot in the back?”

I cap off my gaping yawn with a laugh. “I might. I’ll let you know.” We left Jonah’s private airstrip at five a.m., the sun already high in a cloudless sky, the day promising to be unseasonably warm. After dropping Calla in Bangor and refueling, Jonah and I took off to a few villages along the river, stopping in to check with locals, as much to say hello to them as to treat their pets. It was nostalgic and therapeutic—and exactly what I needed.

We arrived back in Trapper’s Crossing at six with Agnes and Mabel, giving me just enough time to get home to shower, try on everything in my meager closet, and consider canceling my appearance tonight.

Toby’s face splits into a wide grin as he slides a bottle of Coors Light across the bar toward me. The sable-brown scruff that coated his jaw during the winter months is long gone, revealing a baby face that looks far younger than his thirty-six years. “Might have to wrestle Rich for it.”

I search out the construction worker—a staple drunk around here—to find him leaning against the wall for support before letting my focus wander. The Ale House’s interior of mismatched tables covered in vinyl clothes, kitschy signs, and dead animals mounted on the walls has enough charm to draw in a crowd on the regular, and it’s filling up tonight, as the aroma of batter, hot oil, and fried fish lingers in the air.

Jonah and Calla are on the other side of the bar, mingling, Jonah’s arm slung over Calla’s shoulders in a way that’s casual and yet protective.

Calla stands out as usual, her caramel-colored hair styled in beachy waves, her makeup impeccable, her simple outfit of jeans and a rich red-plaid shirt looking both effortless and carefully selected.

She catches me staring, and her smile transforms from amused to sympathetic. I don’t know what reason Jonah gave her about my spontaneous tag along today, but since I arrived at their place this morning, she’s been handling me with kid gloves, as if I might burst into tears at any moment.

She holds up her martini glass in a cross-the-room cheers. This place had never seen anything beyond a pint glass and beer bottle before she moved in. Now she has the McGivneys stocking their bar for her drinking tastes, and I doubt she ever asked them to. They just started doing it because they wanted to. It’s a gift to have that kind of influence over people.

I return the gesture before shifting my focus to Agnes and Mabel, standing with them, Agnes’s smile wide while Mabel absorbs the Ale House’s rambunctious crowd with innocent curiosity. It’s a different world here from the life they’re accustomed to in the west, where booze may no longer be outright prohibited in Bangor, but it’s still restricted due to high rates of alcoholism among the villages.

“Haven’t seen it this busy in a while.” I check the clock on the wall. It’s after nine, and there’s still no sign of Tyler.