Riverbend Reunion(35)

He dressed in a pair of baggy pajama bottoms and a loose-fitting tank top and headed to the kitchen. On the way he stopped to look at both areas for the bar and finally decided that building it near the kitchen would be the better choice.

“Wondering what in the world we’re going to do with that baptismal font?” Jessica asked from the kitchen door.

“Yes, I was. You got any ideas?” he asked.

“Nope,” Jessica answered, “but I bet we come up with something. What if we took it out and used the space as a small wine and extra liquor cabinet? We could lock our extra stock behind the closed doors on either end.”

“That’s actually a pretty good idea,” Wade agreed, “but for tonight let’s just have some cake and coffee and forget about the bar for a little while.”

“Cake is sliced and ready. We just have to heat up the coffee.” She turned and went back into the kitchen.

Wade flipped off the lights in the bar area and made his way across the wide room. “Thanks again for the use of the bathroom. Been a long time since I’ve been in one that clean.”

“Military sticks with us, doesn’t it?” She set the cake on the table and put two mugs of coffee in the microwave.

“Oh, yeah, it does,” he said with a nod. “I cleaned Sparky’s little bathroom half a day, but it still didn’t look too good. That’s not the only thing that sticks with us, though, is it?”

The microwaved dinged and she removed the coffee and set both cups on the table before she took a seat across from Wade. “Nope. Did whatever your job was cause you to have nightmares?”

He took a sip and remembered the recurring dreams that plagued his sleep. “I was a sniper, and yes, I still have nightmares. I probably should be in therapy, but . . .” He shrugged. “I’d have to go to Killeen or to the post at Fort Hood, and I’ve convinced myself that I can deal with it on my own. Are you asking because you have the dreams, too?”

Wade couldn’t only recognize the pain in her face—he could feel it. He wasn’t sure whether to ask another question or change the subject.

“I . . .” She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “My job was in special reconnaissance.” Her voice sounded hollow. “I expect it affected me as much as if I’d been a sniper. I was the only woman on the team, but after the first year, the guys accepted me fairly well.”

Wade reached across the table and laid a hand over hers. “I understand. Sometimes I didn’t even see the face of the person, but I still wake up in a cold sweat hoping that I didn’t rob a child of a father. I’ll never get over knowing that no matter how bad that person was in my sights, I did rob a mother of her child.”

“National security,” Jessica said, “takes its toll on us folks who have to do the work, doesn’t it?”

He gave her hand a little squeeze and wasn’t a bit surprised that his was still tingling when he picked up his fork. Every time he’d brushed against her when they were working on the church pews, sparks had flown. It was a wonder she didn’t feel the heat like he did, but then she probably hadn’t had a crush on him, like he had on her, when they were just teenagers.

“You got that right about those of us who are ordered to do things that bother us.” He cut off a piece of the pound cake and put it in his mouth. “We do what we’re trained for, and try to compartmentalize it, don’t we?”

“We do it for the greater good,” she said just above a whisper. “That’s the words we’re told, but do you think the greater good helps those mothers who lose their sons and daughters, or the children who lose their parents?”

“Nope,” Wade answered. “That would be like talking to a preacher about putting a bar in a church. He’s never done it, never even thought about it, so how could he give advice on whether to take out the baptismal and use part of the area to make shelves for liquor or not?”

“Or to a committee who never taught a day in school and expects to give advice on how to teach kids anything,” she said.

“What brought on that idea?” Wade asked.

Jessica raised one shoulder in half a shrug. “Thinking about Haley going back to school in the fall. I want her to be happy, but I also don’t want her to leave. We’ve got a good team here.”

“Do you often shy away from talking about what you did by thinking of something else?” Wade asked.

“Do you really think that’s what I’m doing?” she asked.

“Yes, because I do the same thing,” he answered. “I’ll talk about building the bar over out there in what used to be the sanctuary to avoid a discussion about Danny.”

“Do you want to talk about him?” Jessica asked.

“I haven’t, not even to Oscar.” Wade shrugged. “I just say that he was killed in the line of duty, but the truth is that it was a tragic accident. He worked in technology, and there was a problem with their equipment during a field training exercise. He loaded up what he needed and started driving. They told me it was only a mile away from base, and the road had been cleared. Evidently, they either missed an IED or one had been planted since they left.”

“And Danny ran over it?” Jessica stood up, moved around the table, and sat down next to him. Then she draped an arm around his shoulders. “I’m so sorry, Wade.”