Reckless (Thoughtless, #3)(98)

I pushed my computer away, no longer inspired.

I fielded phone calls after that, a lot of phone calls—my sister, Jenny, Cheyenne, Kate, and horrifyingly enough, my parents. They thankfully hadn’t watched the videos or seen any still shots, but even my mom and dad couldn’t escape the global gossip of Kellan and Sienna’s sex tape. I don’t think my mom believed me when I told her the wedding was still on.

I finally calmed my parents down, but every single one of my friends had to be “convinced” that the video was years old. Eventually it came down to the tattoo. I gave all of them the assignment of watching the video and looking at Kellan’s chest. If my name wasn’t engraved above his heart, then they would know without a doubt that it was filmed before we were a couple. That fact wouldn’t help me with the general public, since not a lot of people knew about his tattoo as it had been cleverly covered up for the music video, but it swayed my friends. By the time I hung up with them, they grudgingly believed me.

Denny was the last phone call of the day—and the one I’d been dreading the most. I was sitting on the bed I shared with Kellan when my phone rang. The bus had stopped a while ago, and the numerous roadies were out in force, setting up tonight’s show. I had no idea what city we were in; I’d already lost track.

The boys were all out exploring, probably introducing Holeshot to their little drinking game. The two bands meshed together well, which didn’t surprise me; the D-Bags were an easy-going group, they got along with most people. Kellan had asked me to go out with him, but I didn’t want to. Then he’d offered to stay in with me, but I didn’t want that either. I wanted to be alone, staring at the rain streaking down the windowpane and contemplating the strangeness of my life. After he’d gone, I’d found a flower petal taped to the bathroom mirror with the words I’m sorry on it. I knew he was. I was sorry too.

I stared at my ringing phone in annoyance. I almost didn’t have it in me to explain to yet another friend that Kellan wasn’t having an affair with Sienna Sexton. It was a little irritating how quick they all were to jump on the “He’s a D-Bag” train. But with the music video, the photos, the tour changeup, and now the sex tape, the evidence against him was pretty damning, and I didn’t blame them too much. If I weren’t here with Kellan, I might have believed it too.

Seeing Denny’s name on my screen, I hesitated, then picked it up. “Hey, Denny,” I answered, feeling sleepy.

“Hey . . . I bet you’re tired of people calling you.”

I smiled for what felt like the first time in hours. “You have no idea. But I’m glad you called me.”

“So . . . do I ask?”

“It’s Joey’s tape, the one I told you about. She finally leaked it . . . and everyone thinks it’s Sienna. It’s kind of sad, really. Joey wanted to be in his spotlight so badly, and even with documented proof, she still can’t get there.” A humorless laugh escaped me.

Denny exhaled a long breath. “I figured that’s what it was. Are you holding up okay?”

Relief flooded through me. It was so nice to not have to convince someone. “I’m as okay as I can be, considering Kellan is making front page news with another woman. Regardless of who that other woman is or isn’t, it still sucks. I’m afraid to even turn my computer on.”

“Give it some time. They’ll move on to something else soon.”

I shifted my gaze to a raindrop running down the window. Watching the rain was so peaceful. My life used to be peaceful. Wasn’t it, just this morning? “I know, but it’s entirely possible that the next story they move on to will also include Kellan.” I sniffed, hating that this was getting to me. “I just miss . . .”

My voice trailed off. I was about to say that I missed nobody knowing who he was, but that was never true. Kellan had always had a swirl of notoriety around him. He was always a star. It was just on a much smaller scale at Pete’s. Sharing him was nothing new, it was just more expansive now.

Denny answered my open-ended statement. “I know.” Silence stretched out between us, then Denny added, “You could always come home, Kiera. Let that world go for a while?”

Holding my knees tight to my chest, I considered it. I could stay home in an empty house, writing all day and night. I could visit my sister, my friends. I could even fly home to see my parents—briefly—and I could spend time with Denny. It sounded nice, familiar, comfortable, but . . . my heart was anchored to Kellan. Being apart from him stretched my soul in opposite directions. It was painful. No, it was torture. He was everything to me, and I didn’t want to miss a moment of his journey just because parts of it were unpleasant. No. When I’d agreed to be his wife, I’d also been agreeing to stand beside him through thick or thin. And if I could stand by his side during the filming of that damn music video, then I could stand beside him while he dealt with the consequences of his reckless youth. I wasn’t running, I wasn’t avoiding—not anymore.

“No . . . I belong here with Kellan. But thank you for listening, Denny.”

When I ran into Sienna that night, she was all smiles, loving the attention. Of course, she acted mortified when she spoke with anyone who interviewed her. She even walked away from a gossip site reporter, throwing her hands into the air and stalking off like she was offended to the core of her being that something so private was being brought up in casual conversation. By her actions alone, the rumors were confirmed: Kellan and Sienna had made a sex tape together. The world went into a gossip mongering frenzy, and the glorifying of them as a couple exploded into the stratosphere.