Queen of Myth and Monsters (Adrian X Isolde, #2)(21)

The door opened and I turned as Adrian entered the room.

He stared at me, his eyes like embers, and as his gaze trailed my body, I warmed beneath it despite the winter air.

He was dressed in black, with gold accenting the clasps of his surcoat and securing his cloak, which draped over his right arm in a pool of deep red. There was always a sharpness to his features, but this morning they seemed far more menacing.

“Am I a monster?” I asked.

He chuckled, amused by my question, but his response only made me angry. “It would seem so,” he said.

“So you failed,” I said. It wasn’t a fair thing to say, but I felt like fighting because he had laughed and I…I was afraid.

Adrian narrowed his eyes and tilted his head to the side. It was as if I had slapped him. “If I had failed, you would not be here now in human skin.”

I cringed at his words.

“I am human.”

His smile twisted my stomach.

“Not anymore.”

“What is this pride you have?” I demanded. “I am a monster.”

“So am I,” he said. “Does it make you sick to be like me?”

“But I am not like you!” I snarled. “I am a creature, an animal! I do not even know who I will be when I shift. What if I murder innocent people? What if I am murdered by your people?”

It was a fair question. I would look just like every other black hound in a pack.

Adrian’s mouth tightened. “You will not be killed,” he said.

“And you can control that?”

“I will,” he said.

We glared at each other for a moment. I was the first to turn away, closing the shutters. I crossed to the bed where Adrian’s robe lay folded on a chair, pulling it on.

“You are failing to see the potential in this power,” Adrian said.

“It is hard to do so when I do not know what this means for me,” I said. I had already expressed my fears. Did I need to repeat myself?

“What happened last night?” I asked. “After I turned.”

“You came out of the water and collapsed and turned back into…you,” he said. “I brought you inside, and you were still feverish, so I opened the window while you slept.”

I did not know what to say, so I remained silent, attempting to process everything that had occurred.

“Do you think I will leave you to figure this out on your own?”

The angry part of me did not want to figure this out because I did not want to be this.

“And how will we do that?” I asked.

“You are not the only shifter in this kingdom, Isolde,” Adrian said. “There are others like you.”

“Sorin is a falcon, not a—”

“Monster?” Adrian cut me off. “But he is a monster. We all are, and we all have sides of us we must learn to control. You are no different. You never have been.”

I clenched my jaw hard. Right now, I did not feel like controlling myself. I wanted to tear him to shreds. I wanted to eviscerate him with my words. I wanted to lash him with my tongue.

And he must have been listening to my thoughts because he laughed. “I would take the tongue-lashing,” he said, “if it meant I could fuck you on your stomach.”

“You haven’t even tried to understand my fear,” I said. “What makes you think I would let you touch me?”

Adrian’s gaze hardened, and it was my turn to smile, though there was nothing entertaining about this.

“Get dressed,” he said, and I bristled at the order. “High Council is in an hour.”

He left, and I flinched as he slammed the door behind him. I took that as a sign I had succeeded in my goal to hurt him, though to my own detriment, because I did not like that he had left before we could discuss High Council. I wanted to know his agenda, and I wished to communicate mine without the noblesse present. I did not trust that they would support me. Though it was not as if I wanted something that did not align with Adrian’s goal of conquering Cordova.

I wanted to return to Lara, and I wanted to invade Vela to rescue my mother’s people. And nothing about my current situation felt like it would make those things easy.

I left Adrian’s room for my own and summoned Violeta and Vesna with a pull of the servant’s bell. I wanted to get ready as soon as possible, hoping to check on the wounded in the great hall before High Council. Grimly, I wondered if anyone had survived.

Violeta arrived, followed shortly by Vesna, who carried a tray with tea and toast.

“Good morning, my queen,” said Violeta. “Are you well?”

“I am all right,” I said, unable to lie completely. In truth, I did not know. As I had so many times in my life, I was faced with something I had never expected, never wanted, and while marriage to Adrian had become something far more passionate and meaningful than I had ever believed, I failed to see the value in the ability to shift into the form of an aufhocker. I’d have much rather been a falcon or crow—something with wings so that I might collect my own intel on Lara and Vela.

Instead, I was a mindless creature with a thirst for blood.

And I was angry with Adrian for dismissing my fear.

“I wish to get ready quickly,” I said. “I would like to check on the wounded.”

Violeta did not speak, and her silence somehow seemed far more unsettling. My gaze shifted to Vesna, who was pouring tea.