Player(90)

I chanced a look over my shoulder. Sam’s eyes were down, his bass between his legs and hands moving as he played a tune that struck me with familiarity. But before I could place it, the conductor tapped her stand, bringing our attention to her.

And the show went on, as it always did.

It took all my energy to stay focused, especially during the music breaks and intermission. Intermission was torture. He didn’t leave his seat and I didn’t leave mine, but I could feel both of us wishing we could. I could feel his questions, feel the things he wanted to say. I could feel his apologies and his explanations.

The worst was that I wanted him. I wanted to hear every word, wanted to fall into his arms and tell him how I felt. I wanted to get up right then and beg him to tell me he wanted what I wanted, that he felt what I felt.

But I didn’t. I stayed in my seat, wishing for things I couldn’t have.

Somehow, I made it through the show and the curtain call. My plan after that was simple—grab all my stuff and run out of the theater like the devil was chasing me.

We held the last note until it was done. The conductor lowered her hands, we lowered our instruments. And I reached for my case to invoke my plan.

No one else moved other than to shuffle their music around, still sitting attentively in their chairs. I glanced around, confused, as the conductor’s baton lifted and ticked off a beat.

Music rose around me as I sat, blinking stupidly in my chair, trying to figure out what was happening and why I wasn’t in on it. The tune was familiar, the same Sam had been playing earlier.

The same he’d played that night, the night he’d played for me.

In my stupor, I didn’t see Sam until he was in front of me. My body locked, my stomach swapping places with my heart as my eyes followed him. He moved my stand out of the way. Took my trumpet from my hands and set it next to my chair. Dropped to his knees at my feet.

And he took my hands in his, met my eyes and held them.

“I know I promised you I’d stay away, and I swore to your brother I’d leave you alone. And I will, Val. But before I can walk away, I need you to know that I love you.”

Shock, a crack of lightning down my spine.

He loves you, he loves you, he said the words, he said them.

He didn’t stop speaking. “I was wrong about so much. I should have told you about Ian from the start, but I thought I knew better. I thought I could save you, thought you needed me to. But I was wrong. It was me who needed you. It’s me who needs you. I thought I knew what happiness was, but I was wrong about that, too. Because my life was empty until I met you, and it’s been empty since I lost you.”

“Sam,” I breathed. My throat closed with emotion.

“I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you, and I’m sorry I didn’t see this coming. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” He lowered his head, shook it gently. “I don’t expect your forgiveness. I don’t deserve your forgiveness. But you’re the first girl I’ve ever loved, and I couldn’t walk away without telling you. I love you, Val.”

The music flowed around us, brilliant and sweet. It was the song of his heart. And the only truth that mattered in mine sat in the hollow of my mouth, on the tip of my tongue. It passed my lips without fear. “I’ve loved you for longer than I knew. I just didn’t believe you’d ever love me. I didn’t think you could.”

He rose until we were eye to eye, his hands holding my face with adoration. “How could I not? It’s like I said once before—you and I have become a fact. But I didn’t know if I could give you what you needed, what you deserved. What I didn’t realize was that I wouldn’t have to try. Loving you is easy. Giving you everything I am is my joy, my privilege. Making you happy is all I want, Val. Love is music. You are music, and I want to learn every song, every note.”

“Then kiss me and make me sing.”

A twitch of a smile. A sigh he breathed that I breathed in. The tilt of my face.

His lips brushed mine with reverent disbelief, with the awe and grace of a man absolved. And with that kiss, I knew I would have always forgiven him. I would always forgive him. Because no matter what he had done, he’d done it for me. I knew this somehow, knew it in my marrow. In the threads of my veins, I knew.

With that kiss, that exchange of breath, the sharing of heartbeats, I gave him my heart.

It’d always been his.





34





Treasure





Sam

She loved me.

I held her in my arms, felt the weight of her, smelled the sweetness of her, tasted the honey of her lips as I kissed her with my heart and soul.

When our lips slowed and closed, when we opened our eyes, the things I wanted and the things I needed clicked into place before me, beginning and ending with her.

“It’s your symphony,” she said, smiling.

“No, it’s yours.”

Her brow quirked.

“A Dance with Valentina.”

Her face went soft, her eyes velvety and filling with tears as she listened. “You…you named it after me?”

“I wrote it because of you. It was always you, every note, every phrase. It was you in my mind, your face in my thoughts when I heard every measure. I finished it and named it. And then I sent it to my agent.”