Player(59)

Boundaries I’d selectively forgotten.

Something inside me simultaneously broke and snapped back into place like a bone that had healed wrong.

“And you guys are going to be great together. I know him. He’s perfect for you.”

Perfect for me.

I took a painful breath and smiled. “I’d love to meet him.”

“Good, because he’s already agreed to a date. Tomorrow night, if you’re free.”

“Yeah, I’m free.” I was always free. Every night for weeks had been reserved for Sam.

“I’ll let him know.” Sam pulled me to a stop and turned to face me. One hand snaked around my waist, the other cupped my cheek, and his face was smiling and pleased. “This is your final exam. He’s gonna take care of you, Val. And if he doesn’t, let me know so I can teach him a lesson or two.”

I chuckled, though my heart sank on a slow track for my stomach. “So, I guess our lessons are finished?”

He tightened his grip on my waist, bringing me flush against him. “The month ended yesterday.”

My lungs caught in a hitch. The ache in my heart was unbearable.

“But you want to know the truth?”

“What?” I asked breathlessly.

“You didn’t need any lessons in the first place. I just count myself lucky to have been here while you figured it out for yourself. You knew what to do. You proved that to both of us last night.”

The memory flashed through me, through all of me, heart to heel and everywhere in between. Pain drifted in its wake at the knowledge that I wouldn’t have a night like that again, maybe ever.

“Thank you, Sam. For”—wanting me, showing me, helping me, teaching me—“everything.”

“Don’t thank me, not for doing something that was such a pleasure. I…” Something darkened behind his eyes, something he wanted to say. Something I desperately wanted to hear. But then he blinked, and it was gone. “I’m glad we’re friends.”

“Me too.” My smile was as heavy with loss as it was honest with appreciation.

He angled my face, tipped it to his, lowered his lips to brush them against mine in a kiss that was featherlight and fringed with goodbye. And when he stepped back and pulled me into his side once more, the world was colder than it had been a few minutes ago.

And for once, the heat of his body couldn’t chase away the chill.





23





Someone Like Me





Val

I smoothed my skirt, ignoring the three worried faces in the mirror behind me.

“I don’t like it.” Katherine’s words were flat and definitive.

“Honestly, it’s fine,” I said for probably the seventy-second time in the last twenty-four hours. I had been asleep for at least eight of those. “It’s like I said the other night—you know, when I told you guys he wasn’t into me?” I laid a look on all their faces to make sure they’d heard me. They had. “This is what I signed up for. Sam’s just my friend, and I knew when I asked him to kiss me that this was all it would ever be. He’s my friend, and he cares about me. So much in fact that he hand-picked a guy to set me up with. His standards are so high, I have no doubt Adam will be not only handsome, but well mannered and respectful. If he has a good sense of humor, I might just throw my panties at him the second I have the chance.”

Rin frowned. “I’m sorry, Val. I’m honestly just so surprised. I was banking on a declaration and possibly a proposal of marriage.”

I laughed. “Not everyone is like you and Court with the breakneck relationships. Especially not Sam. I’ve never known anyone so unattached. How he could spend this much time with me, be this affectionate and share this much of my life, all while keeping his heart on lockdown is beyond me. I know my heart hasn’t been.”

“No, it hasn’t,” Amelia said softly.

“If he told me right now he wanted to see me, I’d blow off my date and run straight into his arms. If he said he wanted to be with me, I’d dive in without thinking twice. But I’m…I don’t know how to explain it. I’m not under any delusions about him. I know exactly what we are and what we’re not. I know what’s available to me and what isn’t. And Sam’s heart is not on the table. It never was. He did exactly what we set out to do, and now, I’m graduating. We should be celebrating.”

“Then why do you look so sad?” It was Rin, and her eyes, when I met them, were as downtrodden as my own.

I attempted a smile. “Because that doesn’t mean I don’t wish things were different.” I sighed. “But this is exactly how it should be. And that’s just fine.”

“Every time you say the word fine, I believe you less and less,” Katherine said.

A laugh huffed out of me. I turned to face them, holding my hands up in display, palms up. “Do I look okay?” My skirts flared a little when I shifted.

Their affirmations made me feel a little better about the whole mess.

When I looked at the clock, I hissed a swear. I was about to be late. “I’ve got to go. Wish me luck,” I said, scooping up my purse and phone.

We headed out of my room with me leading the charge like we were on an expedition. Although the most gusto I could muster would max us out at conquering a ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese’s.