Perfectly Ordinary People(115)

‘I need your help with something,’ he replied. Then, turning his attention to me, he added, ‘Yours too. I need help from both of you.’

Jake raised both eyebrows. ‘Help?’ he said. ‘I wasn’t expecting that.’

Because I sensed that he was about to go off on one, I discreetly patted his thigh beneath the table in the hope of calming him down.

‘You’ve both read it, I assume,’ Dad said. ‘The interview thing?’

At the realisation that Dad was going to address the elephant in the room, I sensed Jake relax a little beside me.

‘Yes,’ I said. ‘Of course. A number of times.’

Jake nodded solemnly. ‘Me too. But just once.’

‘So I wondered if you could both help me with something. Well, with two things really.’

‘Fire away,’ I said, thinking that he perhaps wanted extra copies or a typed transcript of the untranslated original.

‘I wondered if you, Jake, could help me try to track down Joshua in America. If he’s still alive, that is.’

‘Joshua?’ Jake said. ‘Sorry, but I read it a long time ago. Years ago, actually.’

‘He was Leah’s brother, wasn’t he?’

‘Yes. My uncle, really,’ Dad said. ‘And you’re very good with all those search engines and things, Jake. So I thought you might be able to find out if he’s still around.’

Jake cleared his throat but quite noticeably did not reply, so to move the attention away from him I asked Dad what he wanted from me.

‘I thought you might accompany me on a little trip,’ he said. ‘To France.’

‘To see Igor?’ I asked, already feeling excited.

Dad nodded. ‘I feel that I need to talk to him while he’s still around.’

‘Oh, totally,’ I said. ‘I’d love to! And I’m sure Jake will help you track down your uncle, won’t you?’

‘Um, actually, that depends,’ Jake said. ‘I think there are other conversations we need to have first.’

‘Oh,’ Dad said. ‘Go ahead.’

Jake laughed sourly. ‘You haven’t said anything, Dad! No apology. Not one word about the tapes. Nothing about the fact that you didn’t believe Ruth when she told you. Nothing about missing my wedding. Nothing about making my entire family boycott it. Nothing! So don’t you think you might start there before asking me to help you?’

‘I never made anyone boycott your wedding, Jake,’ Dad said, which, though it could hardly be said that he’d encouraged anyone to go either, was at least factually correct.

‘And in all fairness,’ I pointed out as gently as I could, ‘Mum and Dad didn’t miss your wedding either. You didn’t invite them. Subtle difference.’

‘No, you’re the one who missed it,’ Jake said, turning his glare on me. ‘You were invited and refused to come without Mum and Dad. And if that’s not Dad’s fault, then I imagine it must be yours.’

I raised my hands in surrender. ‘OK,’ I said. ‘But I think you know that was a bit more complicated too. But OK. Whatever.’

‘Anyway, you’re right,’ Dad said. ‘I’m sorry. That’s what I should have said first. I’m sorry for all of it. I should have apologised ages ago. But it’s been hard. It’s been really hard. A shock . . . to the system. A big one.’

‘OK,’ Jake said. ‘That’s a start.’

‘Those tapes . . . they . . .’ Dad shrugged, and I felt really sorry for him. These kinds of conversations had always been hard for him, and I sat there trying to think of a way to subtly remind Jake of just how much effort Dad was expending even trying to talk to us this way.

‘Are we admitting that it’s all true, then?’ Jake asked. ‘Because you haven’t said that either.’

Dad nodded and fidgeted in his seat. ‘Yes, I think it probably is,’ he said.

‘So Grandad and Grandma were gay. And in a fake marriage. And you’re adopted, and an orphan, and Jewish. And our family name isn’t Solomas at all?’

‘Jake!’ I said. ‘Jesus . . .’

‘Well, it’s true, isn’t it?’ Jake said. ‘If we’re saying what’s on the tapes is true.’

‘But you don’t have to be so brutal about it, do you? There are ways of saying things with kindness, you know.’

Jake looked away and blew through pursed lips. ‘OK,’ he said, after a moment. ‘Sorry. Sorry for being so brutal.’

‘This is all still pretty hard for me,’ Dad said. ‘So I’m sorry if I’m . . . not . . . how I’m meant to be or whatever. You know what I mean. But yes, you’re right. All of those things you said would appear to be true.’

‘And I’m supposing the hardest bit is the Jewish thing, is it?’ Jake asked.

‘Jake,’ I pleaded.

‘The Jewish thing?’ Dad repeated.

‘Yeah, being Jewish. Seeing as you hate them so much I would imagine that’s particularly hard to stomach.’

Dad gasped and shook his head. ‘Is that what you really think of me?’ he asked.

‘Yeah,’ Jake said coldly. ‘It is, actually.’