Perfectly Adequate(53)

“Are you done?”

“No. I want a legal agreement that lists the people who are allowed to be unsupervised with Roman. And the list has to be mutually agreeable for every name on it.”

I grunt a laugh. “And you don’t want Dorothy on that list.”

“Are you marrying her?”

“For god’s sake, Jules. Marrying someone doesn’t magically make them more trustworthy.”

“Uh …” she laughs. “I disagree. I’d like to believe that neither one of us would marry someone unless we completely trusted them with Roman.”

“Well, I completely trust Dorothy.” I hate the lie. I mostly trust her. I feel pretty fucking guilty for not being able to completely trust her, but I sure as hell won’t let Julie see an ounce of my doubt. It doesn’t mean I’m planning on leaving Roman with Dorothy again anytime soon. But I want the decision to be mine, not something mutually agreed upon between Julie, me, and our lawyers.

“So you know everything about her? What’s her favorite color? What hospital was she born in? What’s her mother’s maiden name? What school did she attend? Childhood pets? Does she have any cavities? What medications does she take?”

“Enough …” I rub my forehead. “If I hired a professional nanny, I wouldn’t know or give a shit about her favorite color.”

“True. But she’d come with references. And you could do a background check. Drug testing. All the things a responsible parent would do before hiring a nanny. So if you don’t know her well enough to marry her, and you haven’t conducted a thorough background check on her, then you better always be with her when she’s with Roman.”

“Julie—”

“This is nonnegotiable, Eli. I’ll be the bitch if that’s what it takes to keep my son as safe as possible. I’m a little disappointed that you’re not showing the same level of responsibility. And if you can’t do this on your own, I’ll make sure a judge makes you do it.”

My phone vibrates with a message from my nurse. I stand and slip on my lab coat. “I have to go. Have a fucking fabulous day, Jules. You sure have made mine.”

“Why do you make me the bad guy?” She follows me out of my office.

“Because every day I can manage to find something seriously wrong with you is one less day that I have to wonder if something is seriously wrong with me.” I keep walking toward the elevator without looking back.

After checking in on a patient who was readmitted earlier this morning, I make my way to the lab to check on Warren and review some test results.

“How’s it going?” I ask, walking into the lab.

Warren pushes his chair away from the counter to let me look at the computer. “I think it’s going really well.”

It is. We’re seeing massive destruction of cancer cells without major side effects. We still have a lot of testing to do. But small victories matter.

“Willow said she saw Dorothy Mayhem with your son at the farmer’s market last night. Is she babysitting for you now too? Man, that girl can juggle a lot. Has she by any chance said anything about me? She’s taking the whole hard-to-get game to a ridiculous level.”

Great. There were witnesses. I hope that doesn’t get around to Julie. I know she’ll start pulling people into her office to interrogate them.

“I had an appointment. She watched him for me. It’s not an actual job for her.”

“Don’t you have like a million family members always fighting over who gets to watch him?”

Yes. I do. But I didn’t need a babysitter, I needed Dorothy naked in my bed. But that all went to shit. I question if I’ll ever see her naked again.

“Mmm …” is my only answer as I inspect a few slides.

He leans against the counter a few feet from me. “I wonder if she’s a flowers kind of girl. I mean, at first I thought she might be a fun time, you know? But the more she dismisses me, the more I want her. And I think she’s hell-bent on busting my balls until I treat her the way she thinks she deserves to be treated. Ya know?”

“Like an intelligent woman with morals and high standards?”

Warren laughs. “Sure. Something like that. So what do you think? Flowers? Chocolates? Cookie bouquet? Singing telegram?”

I tell myself there’s no reason to not tell Warren the truth. But the real truth is that there’s a million reasons to not tell Warren about me and Dorothy. I don’t need rumors going around because rumors always escalate to the most ridiculous stuff. And the last thing I need is Julie catching wind of something that isn’t true about Dorothy.

“Maybe she’s legitimately not interested. I realize that’s not what your ego wants to hear. But you can’t be a god to every woman.”

“If you’re a Christian who believes in one god, then it’s possible I can be a god—the god—to every woman.”

“In that case, send her a cookie bouquet from Bloomin Bakery.”

“Oh yeah. Those are the best.”

“They really are.”

“I wonder if it’s too late to get one ordered for today? I’d love to get her thinking about me today. That leaves two more days to seal the deal.”

“And by deal, you mean politely ask her out on a date, not make her an on-call room conquest, right?”