Perfectly Adequate(38)

“I actually heard Dr. Hathaway speak years ago at …”





CHAPTER FOURTEEN





Doggy Style

Elijah


Two hours late, I arrive at my parents’ house. Dorothy’s car is still parked in the driveway. That makes me happy. I want to see her. I want to see her around my family.

“Hey.” I smile at my mom as I turn the corner into the kitchen. She looks up from her phone.

“Hi. Leftovers are in the fridge. Everything go okay?”

“Yeah, fine now. Everyone else out back?”

“Uh huh …” She slides her phone onto the counter. “Sorry. I’m on call this weekend. And of course it’s been nonstop. Yes … your dad is out back with Roman and Dorothy.”

“Everything go okay?”

She laughs. “It went well. Really well. We like her. She adores Roman, even though he stuck his fingers in her food. And she sat at his little table with him.”

Of course she did. Dorothy is awesome like that.

“And … Dorothy thinks Julie walks on water.”

I chuckle. “Well, I don’t know if I’d say she thinks Julie walks on water.”

“No.” Mom shakes her head. “I’d definitely say she thinks she walks on water. Dorothy knows more about Julie—professionally—than you and I combined. But …” She holds up a finger. “At first it caught me off guard, and I wasn’t sure how this would all play out. But now I think it’s a good thing. If you and Dorothy get serious, I think her respect for Julie will be a positive for everyone involved. Dorothy could be the glue that holds everyone together with respect.”

I can’t figure out how to properly have sex with Dorothy. A serious relationship seems a ways down the road. And she works three long shifts a week and goes to school. The last thing Dorothy needs is to be anyone’s glue.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I just wanted you to meet her, since she’s met Roman. And I, at the moment, enjoy her company.” I retrieve the food from the fridge, specifically the plate my mom made up and saved for me.

“Okay. I have to call in a prescription. I’ll be right out.”

I nod, grabbing a glass of orange juice before shouldering my way out the screen door to the porch, where my dad’s sitting with a satisfied grin as he watches Dorothy and Roman play ball with Elmo.

“I like her, Eli.”

My shit-eating grin doubles. How could anyone not like Dorothy Mayhem? “Yeah, I do too. How’ve you been?” I sit next to him instead of interrupting the yard play.

“Not bad. Your mom’s bugging me to take time off for a vacation. She wants to go to Costa Rica after Christmas.”

“Well, then take Mom to Costa Rica.”

“I hate to travel.”

I chuckle. “You hate anything that takes you away from your shop. I’m amazed you’re sitting here right now.”

“You know she threatened to do something very brutal to my balls if I didn’t stay … what were her words? Oh yeah, fully engaged, during brunch with your friend.”

“Dorothy will give you a pass if you want to change your clothes and get a wrench in your hands. I’m certain she wasn’t thrilled about meeting you and Mom all alone.”

“You wouldn’t have known. She’s quite chatty when you get her started about something she loves … like your ex-wife.”

A grunt makes it past the spoonful of frittata in my mouth. I wipe it with a napkin. “Was Dorothy here when Julie dropped off Roman?”

He shrugs. “Beats me.”

“Yes,” Mom answers as she pushes open the screen door. “They all arrived at the same time. I gathered there was a conversation happening on the porch before I opened the door. All friendly and amicable. Julie looked a bit thrown by Dorothy being here, but not necessarily angry. Just like it was unexpected.”

I wonder if I’ll get a call or message from Julie. They must have discussed my inviting Dorothy to brunch. “Well, too bad it’s not any of her business.”

“Now, Eli, Roman is her son too. She should be concerned enough to want to know that the people you bring into his life are good for him, and you should have the same concerns about the people Julie dates.”

“I don’t think she dates. I’ve heard she just has random hookups when I have Roman. Go, Julie! It’s never too late to be a slut.”

“Elijah Alexander Hawkins!” Mom whisper yells.

“Too far?” I smirk before taking a sip of my juice.

“Yes. Too far. That’s your child’s mother.” Mom frowns. On Fridays, in her office during lunch, she adheres to a slightly more professional tone with me. But at her house, she isn’t Dr. Lori Hawkins, she’s just Mom. Brutally honest and just as opinionated as any other mom is of their child’s behavior.

“Oh … woman down!” Dad cringes.

I shift my attention to the yard.

“Dorfee! You okay?”

I set my plate on the ottoman and jog out to the landscaped area of shrubs and river rock where Dorothy’s on her ass, hissing as she pulls her scraped knees to her chest.

“Daddy! Dorfee’s bleeding! Call 9-1-1!” Roman squats next to her.