Only a Monster(Monsters #1)(57)

‘If you’re not here to kill me, then what do you want?’ Joan gritted out.

Nick’s eyes travelled down her neck. Joan flushed. ‘That’s a nice necklace,’ he said.

Joan wrenched at her hands, but it was like tugging at a wall. Nick adjusted his grip so that he was holding her wrists with one hand and then slipped a finger under the chain. He tugged until the pendant slipped out from under Joan’s shirt. He made a sound that wasn’t quite amused, just a soft huff of air.

‘I looked for this at the house,’ he said. And Joan remembered the audit he’d been doing—cataloguing every object in every room. Joan thought about how Gran had given her the necklace with the last of her strength. She thought about Ying’s widening eyes when he’d seen it. ‘You were looking for this all along,’ she said.

‘And you had it all along,’ Nick said. ‘I’d never have guessed.’ He turned the pendant. His knuckles brushed against Joan’s throat. She swallowed involuntarily, and knew he’d felt it when he lifted his eyes to hers. ‘I never guessed you were a monster,’ he said. ‘I watched over you at the house. I thought I was keeping you safe.’ He ran his thumb over the little pendant and his forehead creased. ‘I never thought you were one of them.’

It hurt unexpectedly. She hadn’t even known what monsters were until that last day with him. ‘Was it hard killing all those people?’ she asked. ‘Did you feel anything?’

‘I did what had to be done,’ Nick said. And he was the new Nick completely when he said it, his gaze hard. Dangerous.

‘Is that what you tell yourself to sleep at night?’ Joan said.

Something flickered over Nick’s face.

‘Oh, you don’t sleep?’ she said. ‘I haven’t much either since that night.’

‘Where did you find the necklace?’ he said.

‘What is it?’ Joan countered.

He shrugged. ‘A gold necklace with a charming alphyn pendant. Made in the mid-nineteenth century, I’d guess.’

‘What’s at the Monster Court?’

His posture stiffened. He pulled the chain gently until he found the clasp. His fingers worked, and then the chain and pendant were in his palm. They disappeared into his pocket. When he pulled his hand out again, he had a knife.

Joan’s breath caught.

‘I told you,’ Nick said. ‘I won’t kill you here.’

‘You should,’ Joan whispered.

Nick tilted his head.

‘I’m going to come after you,’ Joan promised. ‘I’m going to stop you from killing anyone else. I’m going to kill you.’ She’d never imagined she’d say those words to anyone—let alone Nick. She’d never imagined they could be true. She felt as though she were squeezing her own heart in her fist.

Nick’s hand tightened for a moment over Joan’s wrists. Then he released her, slowly. He stood, knife ready if she attacked. When she didn’t, he stepped back.

Joan gripped the edge of the table so that she wouldn’t be tempted to try anything now.

‘I mean it,’ she said. ‘You’re dead.’

He gave her his familiar solemn smile, the one that he’d given her all the time at the house. ‘Aren’t we all,’ he said. ‘Somewhere on the timeline.’





FOURTEEN




Joan ran back to the monster street. She wiped angrily at her face as she did. She hated that she was crying.

Being that close to Nick had brought it all back—all the feelings she’d had for him. Maybe still had for him. And in turn he’d told her the truth in that clear-eyed way he had. He’d have killed her family even if he’d known who they were to her. He’d have killed her if the cameras hadn’t been there today. To him, she was a monster, and he’d been born to kill monsters.

And Joan was terrified too. Her mind kept throwing up images of Ruth and Aaron dead in the flat. Of everyone on that monster street lying dead—just like at Holland House.

She made herself take the long way, though, down side alleys and doubling back rather than running straight to the flat like she wanted to. She wasn’t going to lead Nick to anyone.

For the first time, she looked for cameras, avoiding them like Aaron always did. Nick had pointed out the cameras in the café, and Joan was sure that was how he’d found her. She was beginning to understand why monsters hated cameras. If your enemies could travel in time, you never wanted to leave a record of where you’d been.



The market was bustling with people. Joan wanted to scream at them: The hero is here in this time! But she’d have sounded mad—like screaming that Superman was here.

She stumbled up the wrought-iron staircase to the landing. To her relief, she could hear Ruth and Aaron arguing through the door of the flat.

‘—the only family without allies,’ Aaron was saying. ‘That’s how much you’re despised.’

Joan pounded on the door and Ruth opened it mid-sentence. ‘I don’t know what the Mtawalis see in your family,’ Ruth said. ‘They’re too—’

‘Stop,’ Joan said. She’d had it with their fighting. She slammed the door behind her and took a deep breath. ‘We have to stop this,’ she said. ‘Nick is here.’