One of the Girls(6)
‘Yes, great. We’re great. Everything’s great.’ How many times do I want to say great?
‘Seemed like there was a bit of an atmosphere at the airport.’
‘Not at all! We were just busy making sure everyone got on the right flight!’ Bella caught the shrill note in her voice as she lied.
Lexi’s instincts were right, though. It wasn’t that she couldn’t talk to Lexi about her problems. It was that she couldn’t talk about this one.
She replayed the deep, perplexed frown that had settled between Fen’s brows as they’d waited for the others in the departure hall. ‘You know what I’ve always admired about you?’ Fen had said.
Bella had waited, tears streaking her cheeks, her mouth empty of answers.
‘Your honesty. Your forthrightness. That you never apologise for being you.’ Fen had paused, head shaking, eyes large. ‘But now … now I’m not sure I even know who you are.’
Bella swallowed hard, pushing down the memory. ‘Right,’ she said brightly, grabbing Lexi’s suitcase and heaving it on the bed. ‘Get your bikini on. We’re going for a swim!’
A set of sun-bleached wooden loungers lazed around the swimming pool. Bella, abuzz with holiday excitement and a sharper beat of adrenalin, wanted to do everything all at once – sunbathe, swim, drink, eat, explore.
She picked a sun-lounger in the last slice of sun, laid her towel across it, then settled herself on top. She wore a brand-new leopard-print bikini with construction-grade underwiring that held her breasts high and proud, and mid-waisted bikini bottoms that sculpted her backside into peachy curves.
Where is Robyn with the shopping? She could have murdered an ice-cold beer.
From her beach bag, she took out a compact mirror and reapplied her lipstick. It gave her something to do while she waited for Lexi. She’d never been good at being still.
She glanced over her shoulder towards the mountains, wondering if she could catch sight of Fen. The landscape looked arid, mostly low-lying scrub and a few patches of trees further inland. She pushed her sunglasses onto her head, squinting into the light. No sign of her. A quick jog for Fen meant an hour of running at an unfathomable pace. She’d probably already crested the mountain.
She needed to carve out some time alone with Fen this weekend. Make things right.
‘Ready to swim?’ Lexi said, crossing the terrace in a simple black bikini.
Bella cleared her throat, pulled down her sunglasses, and pasted on a bright smile. ‘Sure am.’
‘The sea?’
Bella turned, gazing down to the empty cove below. A tiny pebble beach reached out into impossibly clear water, the turquoise sea gradually shifting to deeper shades of navy. The sleeping shadow of the neighbouring island rested on the horizon; clusters of white buildings clung like calcified barnacles to a whale.
Bella was more of a pool person. She didn’t like waves. Or those drapey, reaching fingers of seaweed. Or fish. No, she hated fish with their slick, muscular bodies and flashing scales. The pool was her place. You could see the bottom. You knew what was in it. Chlorine was her friend.
But it was Lexi’s hen party. ‘The sea, then.’
Stone steps wound steeply down the face of the cliff, the white paint flaring in the sun. They went barefoot, the stone achingly hot. The scent of sun lotion lifted in the heat.
‘How many bloody steps are there?’ Bella muttered, skirting a gecko eyeing her from a step. She turned, squinting up towards the empty villa. It was so high, as if it had been designed that way to keep guard.
By the time they’d reached the beach, beads of sweat had gathered at her hairline. They hot-footed it across the heat-drenched pebbles, then dunked their singed soles in the mercifully cool shallows. The water was startlingly clear, sharpening the contours of the seabed.
Lexi, as in life, waded straight in, diving forward and disappearing beneath the sun-rippled surface. She rose moments later, face washed fresh.
‘Don’t splash me!’ Bella warned as she edged deeper, stomach sucked in, checking for sea urchins. No urchins in a pool.
As she glanced back towards the villa, she saw a cloud of dust rising as the second taxi arrived. She watched Robyn, Ana and Eleanor as they climbed out, hauling bags of shopping towards the villa.
She didn’t feel bad for tasking Robyn with the food shopping: she was the second bridesmaid and, so far, all Robyn had done was ask her typically boring questions about Wi-Fi access and travel insurance. For God’s sake.
If Lexi noticed the others arriving, she’d insist on returning to the villa and helping them unpack the shopping. Bella was desperate for a slice of time alone with Lexi. She pushed off in breaststroke, keeping her chin stiffly above the waterline. When she reached Lexi, she pointed towards an outcrop of sun-baked rocks. ‘Let’s swim out there.’
As their arms parted the clear water, the lowering sun against their faces, Bella felt a settling deep in her body, like something that had been out of alignment had shifted back into place. Just you and me.
5
Robyn
Robyn shoved the salad items to the back of the fridge, making space for the white wine.
There. That was the last of the unpacking.
She closed the fridge, then flexed and arched her back, the familiar ache clawing into her pelvis.
She checked her watch. Bathtime at home. She pictured Jack’s little body, slick and glossy in the scented bubbles. Some evenings she’d marvel at him: the perfect pale skin, his delighted expression as he slapped his palms against the warm water, or that sweet moment of wrapping him in a parcel of soft towel, clean and fresh and ready for bed. Other evenings she just wanted to rush through the bedtime routine so she could go downstairs and – what? Watch Netflix with her parents? Fire up the laptop and catch up on work?