Natalie Tan's Book of Luck and Fortune(43)
The weight of my confession pressed against my better judgment. I shouldn’t have burdened Daniel with my worries. “I’m a horrible first date for dumping my problems on you. Please, just ignore what I said.”
“I want you to succeed in your restaurant. Of course, I’ll help.” His dark eyes bored into mine. “You care about this, so I care about this. It’s that simple.”
The third room showcased a rain shower. Blue hydrangea petals were suspended from the ceiling via invisible fishing lines, like raindrops. There must have been thousands of them, and the effect was breathtaking. The sound of a gentle rain shower filtered through the stereo system. Magical.
“This is one of the most beautiful dates I’ve ever been on,” I said. “I never imagined flowers could be transformed this way.”
“Now you know why I had such a hard time finding the right experience for you. Three of those floral raindrops, I am responsible for. I had to learn how to sew on the fly. Swapna had me prove my friendship via needlework.”
We held hands and walked into the final room. Inside was a snow white wedding gown made of gardenia and rose petals. The twelve-foot-long train bisected the room, reminiscent of the central aisle of a church. The silhouette of the dress was the same shape I would have worn if I had married Emilio that day. Guilt punched me in the gut.
“Are you all right?” Daniel asked.
He must have noticed the change in my expression. I could have chosen to keep my mouth shut and remain silent, but I didn’t.
“It looks like the wedding dress I had. I was engaged once, but I never made it down the aisle.” I stopped. I never even had the chance to tell Ma-ma about it. At the time, I planned to tell her, and if I had gone through with it, we would have had a ceremony at the apartment for my mother’s sake. But the wedding never happened, and my guilt for keeping it from her disappeared along with a future I once envisioned. Had I made a mistake again in disclosing too much to Daniel too soon? Once revealed, the truth expanded, free of its cage. Trying to coax it back in was as futile as trying to shove toothpaste back into the tube.
“Can you tell me what happened?” he asked.
“I wasn’t ready. I should have told him how I felt before everything was set. If I could do it all over again, we’d take the relationship slower. I didn’t want to hurt him, but I did.”
“It’s in the past. You’re here now, and I for one am glad you didn’t get married. Things have a way of working out. A few months ago, I thought I’d be living in Seattle. I got a job offer there and was thinking of accepting it, but I didn’t. If I had, I wouldn’t have met you.”
“There’s something refreshing about living your life without regrets, isn’t there?” I asked.
“I agree. I never want to say the words ‘if only.’ It would mean that I’d missed out on something very important to me.”
He meant me. I was the important thing. Was this how Ma-ma had felt? Accepting love and feeling worthy of it? My mother knew she’d found her mate almost instantly. It had taken me a few more meetings, but I was coming to a similar conclusion. I could only hope that I didn’t screw this up somehow by running away.
* * *
?After the art gallery, we headed in search of Daniel’s favorite food truck. He’d promised me the best cabeza tacos I’d ever taste. We grabbed two orders and two sodas before finding a picnic table near the water. The tacos were juicy and heavy on the cilantro, which I loved.
He leaned over and wiped a spot of sauce near my chin. “Good?”
“Very good,” I replied. “You know that I’m an only child. How about you?”
“One older sister. Alana lives in St. Paul with her wife, Helen. She’s a physiotherapist with her own clinic. They have two boys, Matty and Tim. I try to see them as much as I can. My parents moved to Minnesota to be closer to their grandkids. My sister tells me that I get custody of our parents when I have kids.”
I laughed. He sounded like he was quite close to his family despite their being thousands of miles away. Ma-ma would have loved him. “Do you want to have kids eventually?”
“I’d be happy with one or five. You?”
“I want a daughter. Anything more will be a blessing.”
He smiled. “A mini version of you would be adorable.”
I could get lost in his eyes and his words, the way sincerity rang through each look and compliment. I felt spoiled, like a child with carte blanche in a sweet shop. It was a foreign and exhilarating sensation.
“Why are you being so wonderful to me?” I asked him.
“Because you’re worth waiting for.”
Daniel leaned across the table. His handsome face hovered inches from mine. The air around us popped with bubbles, evanescent, floating like miniature balloons. The same kind that were populating the soda bottle by his hand.
I inched closer. The instant my lips touched his, the bubbles hovering in the air exploded into minuscule fireworks. The sound of fizzing erupted around us, waves and waves rising from the cool glass, bursting into stars. Bliss.
* * *
?We walked along the waterfront and counted the boats in the marina.
I didn’t want the date to be over. I yearned to know more about this wonderful man who held my hand and my heart. “Why don’t I come over and cook you dinner?”