My Big Fat Fake Wedding(68)

“That’s great, Mom. I’m glad they’re coming too,” I say, also relieved that they’re staying with Nana. Being college students means they’re broke as a joke, I’m sure, so it’s a real gift that they’re coming for the big family affair of my wedding. And I know they want to see Papa one last time. But I’ve heard them sing, though it was years ago, and Little Mix doesn’t have to worry about the triplets taking over their sales, that’s for sure.

“That’s what I was going to call you about, Violet. They land in about ninety minutes, and I have got to go work. If I call out today, my boss is going to crap himself.”

I can hear the direction she’s going with this and glance down to my planner’s to-do list and appointments. Another dress shop is coming by, I need to finalize the velvet for Ms. Montgomery’s drapes and prepare for the next room in her never-ending renovation, order Ross’s couch for his office, and now I need to get ready for this gala. I pencil that in and scribble a Post-It note to remind myself to fill Archie in when he gets here.

“Okay, I’ll send a car to pick up the triplets. Don’t worry, Mom.” There. See? I can do it all and not miss a beat.

“Violet,” Mom draws out my name in disappointment. “You cannot send an impersonal car to pick up your family. That would be disrespectful. You need to go pick them up, please?”

That should be a question. We both know full-well that’s it’s not. It’s an order, a directive I can’t and won’t ignore.

I sigh, drawing an arrow through the couch ordering and moving it to tomorrow. Ross won’t mind, not when he’s the one who added the gala to my to-do list, anyway. “Fine, I’ll get the triplets and take them to Nana’s. What’s their plan from there? Do I need to play hostess with the mostest?” I pray that’s not what Mom wants me to do.

I hear her car start up, and she switches me over to the speakerphone. “No, nothing like that. Just pick them up, go to Nana’s and politely excuse yourself for wedding things. They’ll understand. Beyond the wedding, they’re mostly here for sightseeing, free food, and laundry services. Nana will take good care of them and enjoy doing it.”

“Okay, I’m on it.”

“I’ve got to go, baby girl. Can’t drive and talk, you know. Can you text me the information about this charity event thing Kimberly wants us to go to? I’m happy to do whatever you need me to do, Violet. I’m just so proud of you.” There’s a moment of hitched breathing, but then she lets out a big exhale. “Sorry, I really have to go. Love you, bye!”

And with a click, she’s gone. “Fuck me!”

“Intriguing, Boss Bitch, but I think that job’s already taken,” Archie says, sticking his head in my door. “What’s up?”

I give him the full rundown on everything’s that’s happened as he takes notes, and then I summarize. “I need you to go onsite and handle the ballroom for a few hours,” I tell him, grabbing my purse and keys. “Apparently, I’ve gotta pick up some cousins and drop them at Nana’s. I’ll text my mom about the charity gala, and achieve world peace, which would probably be easier than integrating my family and Ross’s. Then I need to pull off the miracle of finding the right wedding dress. So my, you know, actual career I need to leave in your capable, manicured hands.”

Archie checks out his black-polished, stubbed nails, humming. “Speaking of which, I really do need to take some time off for a mani-pedi—”

“You’d better be joking.”

Archie grins and smacks me on the hip. “Of course I am. Go. Chill the fuck out. I got this shit.” He looks cool as a cucumber, reclining back in my guest chair with one booted ankle resting on his other knee. “Oh, I’ll coordinate with Jeeves to get you and your family all scheduled for a fluff and polish before the gala.”

I blink, his words taking a moment to sink in. “His name is Karl, Archie. He’s the Andrews’ butler. Butler? Is that the right word now? Assistant? Home Manager?”

Archie’s eyes twinkle as he drolly says, “House elf? Dobby is free. Master gave Dobby a sock.” The high-pitched squeal and fake British accent sound odd out of his mouth, which only makes me grin more.

“Thanks, I needed that. You really are the best!” I lay a quick kiss on his cheek and then head for the door. “Oh, Abi told me about your suit. It sounds awesome! Can’t wait to see it.”

At least the drive out to the airport is easy. Traffic’s pretty good at this time of day, and I’m even able to sit in the baggage pickup lounge for twenty minutes, typing out emails and sending them.

I just hit Send on my message to Mom, giving her the details of the Gala and letting her know that Karl and/or Archie will be in touch with our appointment times to get ready, when I’m interrupted by a harmonic squeal. “Violet!”

I look up as Estella, Vanessa, and Marissa come up, practically bouncing along and making a young guy who’s wheeling his bag out the door stumble as he does a legitimate triple-take. I’ll give it to the triplets . . . they’re lookers, all of them.

“It’s been too long,” I tell them honestly, group hugging and exchanging cheek kisses all around. “What, ten years, at least?”

“At least!” Marissa says with a grin. “You look great, Vi. Damn, girl, I hope your man likes boobs!”