Music of the Heart (Runaway Train, #1)(24)



Jake’s frantic gaze swept over to mine while he opened his mouth and gasped for breath.

I gave him a reassuring smile while rubbing his shoulder. “You were having a nightmare.”

Jake continued wheezing in air. I eased back as he swung his legs out of the bunk and onto the carpet. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he leaned forward and put his head in his hands. “I’m sorry I woke you,” he replied.

With my protective side shooting into overdrive, I scooted closer to him, bringing my hand to his hair. Gently, I ran my fingers through the dark, sweat-stained strands, pushing them out of his eyes. “You didn’t wake me. I was worried about you.”

His head jerked up as surprise flooded his face. “You were?”

I nodded. “You seemed a little down after your phone call with your aunt. Then with the nightmare.” I glanced up at AJ who was curiously watching us. “I know most of the guys aren’t men enough to handle emotions and issues—”

AJ snorted. “Those are your words, not mine.”

“Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I’m here for you. If you need to talk about something or if you just need someone to sit with you until you can go back to sleep, then I’m here.”

With wide eyes and his mouth gaping open, Jake stared at me for a moment like I had grown horns. Realizing I wasn’t getting anywhere with him, I held up my hands. “Or I can just leave you alone and go back to sleep. Either is fine.”

When I turned to leave, Jake grabbed my hand. “Wait,” he instructed in a hoarse voice.

“Okay.”

“That’s a really sweet offer, Angel. It makes me feel like a real ass. I need to tell you how sorry I am about earlier. That was a real douche move. Not that it matters, but she came on to me. But I should have told her no and meant what I told you.”

I was so not expecting an apology from him, so it took me a minute before I could even process thoughts, least of all acknowledge what he had said. “Thank you.” When he gave me an embarrassed smile, I sighed. “As much as I appreciate hearing that, it’s not what’s really bothering you, is it?”

He shook his head. “It’s just...” He cleared his throat. “My Aunt Sally was calling for my mother. She said Mama didn’t want to worry me in the middle of the tour and refused to tell me the truth of what was going on…”

“What’s wrong?” I urged.

His chest rose and fell in harsh breaths. “After being in remission for three years, my mom’s cancer has come back. Aunt Sally says…” His face contorted in agony. “She says there’s nothing they can do this time—no more treatments. She’s being given medicine to make her comfortable for her last…few months.”

I gasped. “Oh Jake, I’m so, so sorry.” I took his hands in mine and squeezed. The expression on his face was one of pure anguish and devastation, and my chest constricted for the pain I could feel radiating off of him.

Tears welled in his tormented blue eyes. “It’s just…” He motioned towards the bunks. “You can ask the other guys about what an absolute Mama’s Boy I am. After my dad ran off with his secretary and got remarried, I was her world. She’s everything to me. I can’t even think about…” His words choked off with emotion, and then he started crying. Well, it was more harsh, body shuddering sobs. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him to me. He buried his face in my stomach, his body heaving and shaking from his cries.

His wailing brought Brayden from his roost while Rhys staggered out of the bedroom. Both of them stared at Jake in disbelief like he was some alien life form. I don’t know if it was the crying or the fact he was wrapped in my arms. When I glanced up at AJ, his expression was shell-shocked, but there was also pain in his eyes. After all, he’d grown up with Jake and knew his mom very well.

I gave AJ an empathetic look. “Not Susan,” he said softly. He pinched his eyes shut, and I knew he was fighting not to start crying himself. “Motherf*cker,” he muttered under his breath.

The next thing I knew I tumbled backward when Jake sank onto his knees on the floor of the bus. Pulling on my hips, he jerked me down beside him, wrapping me in a bear hug. “Shh, it’s going to be okay,” I crooned into his ear.

He shook his head wildly back and forth. “No, it’s not. If it hadn’t been as bad as it was, Aunt Sally would never have called.” My body shook so hard with his sobs that my teeth clattered together. “Oh God, I can’t bear this, Angel. I’ll die without her.”

Although I’d grown up watching my parents handle emotional parishioners on a daily basis, I felt completely and totally helpless when it came to comforting Jake. I tried to draw on the right words to say to comfort him as I rubbed wide circles across his back.

“Listen, I’ll call my parents and tell them to put her on their prayer list. I mean, they don’t call my dad’s church the God-dome for nothing! And maybe there’s another doctor she can see. You know, get a second opinion or something.” My mind spun with thoughts as I tried to think of something to do or say to comfort Jake since he continued to sob uncontrollably. As soon as I thought of another one, I blurted, “Hey, one of our church’s deacons is on the board of a cancer treatment center. We can get your mom an appointment there.”

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