Maggie Moves On(116)
“Having fun. I told you. I warned you from the start,” she said defensively.
“I know you did. But actions speak louder than words. I’ve got more damn clothes than you do in your closet. You bought my dog a bed for your office.”
“Your roots are here,” she argued. “You can’t just rip them out and go if I want to.”
“They’re planted deep, and that’s why they’ll survive no matter where I am. It’s you, Maggie. I’ve been waiting for you. Make the decision. Don’t just do what you’ve always done and call it a choice.”
43
They cooked balsamic chicken with oven-roasted vegetables and ears of bicolor sweet corn loaded with butter and salt to a group-curated playlist that covered everything from Dua Lipa to The Smashing Pumpkins and Earth, Wind & Fire.
The kitchen—her kitchen—was filled with people she loved, but Maggie was having a hard time enjoying it, knowing that she’d hurt one of them so deeply.
They gathered around the dining table to eat off real dishes and catch up on the day as the world outside the window went pink and orange. Afterward, with the dishwasher making its maiden voyage, they gathered on the terrace to enjoy Popsicles and beers.
While Keaton put on a show for the adults, running from one end of the terrace to the other with the cats and Cody giving chase, Silas wandered over to the fountain. Maggie felt herself drawn to him. She intertwined her fingers through his and squeezed, hoping she hadn’t ruined this. Not with everything that she’d realized today.
He returned the squeeze and brought her knuckles to his mouth.
She loved him. Fiercely. And that scared the hell out of her. She thought there wasn’t anything worse until the sun set. Then Silas said his goodbyes, collected his dog, and drove home.
“Where’s Sy going?” Dayana asked, approaching her with a glass of wine in one hand and a Popsicle wrapper in the other.
“He’s giving me some space,” Maggie said evenly.
Dayana shot her a “have you lost your damn mind?” look. “Did you ask for space?”
Maggie shook her head. “He saw me looking at property listings and an offer from a network.”
“You’re leaving?” Dayana asked, dark eyebrows skyrocketing.
“I don’t know,” she said honestly. “I always leave. I always move on to the next thing. This is the first time I’ve even thought about a ‘what if I stay.’ But I don’t make decisions like he does. He jumps. I weigh options, outcomes, consequences.” She paced the tile she’d spent hours researching.
“Because you want it to be right.”
“Yes! Exactly! He can’t just demand that I commit to him on the spot. He can’t possibly understand the consequences of a decision like that,” she complained. “He acts like it’s easy to just go for it. But he’s not even considering how resentful he might get if he comes with me or how resentful I might get if I decide to stay.”
“Hold it. This sounds vaguely familiar,” Dean mused, joining them near the fountain. Cody followed him.
“It should. You resent choosing me over Will. I shouldn’t have made you feel like it was your job to keep me happy or make things up to me. And you,” she said, pointing at Cody. “You say you want to come on the road with me. But you’re eighteen years old. Do you even know what that entails? How do you know you really want to or that you won’t change your mind six months into it? What if you get homesick for Kinship?”
“Uh, then I come back?” Cody said, looking at her like the answer was obvious.
“Most decisions can be undone. Minds can change,” Dayana pointed out.
“Are you going to change your mind and go back to Donald? You came here to get away from it all. What will you do if I put up a FOR SALE sign and decide I’m going to rehab a house in Arizona or Kansas?”
“I came here because it was time we got to know each other as sisters,” Dayana told her. “And no, I’m not changing my mind about Donald.”
“We’re all responsible for our own choices,” Dean told her. “I’m responsible for choosing not to settle down with Will, and thank God I did. Because look who I’m joining for a night of good wine around a firepit tonight? I could have missed out on Michael if I’d settled. But I chose. I made the decision. You didn’t force me into it or cast some spell shackling me to you.”
“Should we be offended that Maggie thinks we’re all incapable of making our own decisions?” Cody asked everyone.
“Yes,” Dean and Dayana agreed.
“Maybe you should think about what’s best for you instead of worrying about what you think is good for everyone else,” Cody suggested.
“He’s wise beyond his years,” Dayana observed.
“He gets that from me,” Dean announced proudly.
They grinned at each other.
“Part of Maggie’s problem is she’s constantly searching for stability in an unstable world,” Dayana posited.
“That makes sense,” Dean agreed. “She lost her mom so young and without warning. It makes her feel like everything can change in a heartbeat, so she clings to things like plans and goals and timelines to feel like she has control.”