Lucky Caller(52)

“TGI Fridays, though?” Joydeep burst out, incredulous.

“He, like, famously loves their loaded potato skins. He’s tweeted about it.”

“No,” I said. “No no no. It’s enough we’ve got the Deadnoughts. We’re not dragging the TION fandom into this.”

“We didn’t do anything,” Jamie said. “People interpreted something wrong. That’s not our fault.”

“Yeah, but once it’s out there, it’s out there,” Sasha said. “Even if it’s not true, just the idea that it could be is enough for people.”

Joydeep nodded. “I say we just announce your dad once and for all. If people want their money back, that’s their own fucking deal.”

Sasha nodded, then glanced my way. “At least we have some kind of guest, even if it’s not the one everyone’s expecting.”

I swallowed. Anxiety roiled in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t want to have to rip this Band-Aid off.

But there was no avoiding it. Or at least I knew that avoiding it any longer would only make it exponentially worse.

“We actually … don’t.”

They all looked my way. “Sorry, what?” Joydeep said after a moment, voice ominously calm.

Mine was small in response: “We actually … don’t have a guest. He can’t…” I shook my head. “He’s not coming.”

The silence that followed seemed interminable, though in reality it was probably only a moment or two before Joydeep stood and walked over to one of the pottery stands.

“Let me get this straight,” he said, turning back to face us. “The event is one week away. We don’t have Tyler Bright. We don’t have Lucas from TION. And now we don’t even have the actual person that we were actually supposed to have in the first place, your own dad, we don’t even have your own dad. That’s what you’re telling me. We have nothing.”

“Except ticket money from four hundred people,” Sasha said hollowly.

“And each other,” I added, because I’m an idiot.

“Oh, great,” Joydeep said. “Great. This is great. Really great.”

“You have to stop saying great,” Jamie replied.

“Fantastic!” Joydeep exploded. “Is that better? Nina, how did this even happen? You said he was for real confirmed this time. You said one hundred percent! How could this have happened?”

I looked at them for a moment. Three expectant faces.

“I lied,” I said.





49.


“WHAT THE FUCK?” JOYDEEP SAID, quietly and with great sincerity.

I shrugged. The looks on their faces were too much to handle, so I fixed my eyes on the series of fake magazine covers lining the back wall. The one in the center was a Rolling Stone cover mock-up featuring a girl wearing a pink leotard, posing provocatively.

“I … I’m sorry,” I said.

And then there was nothing to do but bail.

Jamie followed me out and caught up with me, longer legs carrying him faster so he could circle around and cut me off at the end of the hall.

“Why would you do that?” he said. “Why would you lie?”

What it all boiled down to was this:

I couldn’t admit the truth. That my dad didn’t want to be there for either me or Sidney. Because that’s what it was, wasn’t it? He was just waiting for an opening. For a reason to not have to come, and it took care of itself. He couldn’t pick between us. That made it about us, not him.

So I made it about me, not him, because that was just easier, wasn’t it, than saying the reality of it out loud.

“Because I suck, Jamie,” I said. “You’re just too nice to admit that. Or to realize it in the first place, maybe, I don’t know. I suck, and I fucked this up for all of us, and that’s just how it is. Sorry. I’m sorry.” I met his eyes now. “I’m sorry.”

He shook his head. “You lied about lying.”

I let out a pathetic breath of laughter, trying to sound cavalier. “What?”

He was completely serious. “He did confirm. You did confirm it. I know you did. So what happened? Why can’t he come?” He looked concerned. “Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine.” I swallowed. “Everything’s exactly the way it always is.” I wanted to cry for some reason. Instead I just looked away, squeezed the strap of my backpack, and nodded.

Then I walked away.





50.


THE KISS BETWEEN JAMIE AND me wasn’t the actual end of the Kingdom revival. Remarkably, Iliana, Aurelie, Hapless, and Quad met once more after that.

It was a week or so after the eighth-grade museum trip, after I messed things up with Jamie. I was working on homework in our room when Sidney burst in wearing her Quad outfit.

I looked up from a row of geometry problems. “What are you doing?”

“What are you doing?” she replied. “Jamie’s coming. We’re playing.”

“What?”

“I saw him in the lobby with Mom on Tuesday and he said he’d come. He was busy yesterday, but he’s free today and he’s coming over”—there was a knock at the door—“now!”