Lovely Girls(19)

We were all crammed into his small office, which is next to the team locker rooms in a cinder block building near the tennis courts. Coach was standing at his whiteboard, holding a marker. There weren’t enough seats, so I was leaning against the doorframe.

Coach said, “Here’s the lineup for the first match,” and then turned to write down the names in block letters.

I wasn’t on the lineup. For singles, he put Daphne in court one and Callie in court two. And for doubles, it was Bella and Mackenzie in one, Shae and Leah in two, and Chan and Dena in three. Everyone started talking at once. Some people were happy, some were pissed off. I wasn’t the only one who didn’t make the lineup. There are fourteen girls on the team, and only eight can play each match, so six of us weren’t playing. But still. Being left off the lineup for the first match of the year is humiliating. Back home in Buffalo, I played first-court singles every single match since I was a sophomore. I’d never been left off a lineup. Ever. And all I could think about was how disappointed my dad would have been in me.

Whatever my mom says, I know Dad just wanted the best for me. He thought I could be a champion. But I’m obviously not. I didn’t even make the lineup for my high school team.

Alex’s eyes filled with tears. She inhaled deeply and then exhaled, struggling to gain control of her emotions.

Anyway. I was standing there, and I could feel my face getting red, which I hate. But I tried to stay as calm as possible and kept looking right at Coach. He didn’t look back at me. As far as I can tell, he barely knows my name, much less what I’m capable of on the court. And then I thought, well, maybe that’s the problem. I’ve been to a full week of practices, and Coach hasn’t seen me play once since I made the team. He spends most of his time watching the girls who made it onto the lineup. Like they’re the only ones who matter.

Daphne was acting like she’d just won Wimbledon. She was smiling and tossing her hair around. And that idiot Shae, who worships Daphne, kept saying, “I knew you’d get first court. I just knew it.”

Alex stuck a finger in her mouth and pantomimed that she was about to vomit.

Coach finally held up his hands and said, “Remember, this is just the first match. I’m sure there will be changes in the lineup as the season progresses. And everyone who wants to challenge for a spot will have the opportunity to do so.”

After the meeting, everyone left. I headed back out to the courts with a hopper full of balls. I need to practice my serve, which is by far the worst part of my game. My dad would make me go out to the practice court after a loss. He always told me that I can’t afford to have a weakness. I served until my shoulder hurt. It felt sort of good, like I was serving all of the anger right out of my body.

When I was done, I picked up the balls with the hopper and went to put it in the storage closet next to the locker rooms. Everyone on the team had left, but Coach Townsend’s door was cracked open, and there was a light on in his office. I was trying to decide if I should go in and talk to him. And then I thought about my dad again. I knew what he would say, because he’d said it to me a thousand times before. You need to fight for everything you want. No one’s ever going to hand you anything.

I could hear his words so clearly, for a moment, it felt like he was right there with me.

I decided okay, I was going to do it. I was going to go talk to Coach. I’d ask him about how the challenge system worked and see if maybe he’d watch me in practice one day. I hesitated at the door, trying to make up my mind whether to knock.

Then I heard a noise.

It was like a low moan. And then a sharp intake of breath. I thought for a minute that someone was hurt. Because it sounded sudden and urgent. But then I heard another voice. A female voice.

I suddenly realized there was a girl in there with him. And my first thought was Callie, probably because of what Daphne had said at the party about Callie having the hots for him. And at practice that afternoon Coach had been helping Callie correct her forehand swing. He’d been standing really close to her and had had his hand on her waist.

And now there was a girl in Coach’s office moaning softly.

Oh, my God. I should have left then. Why didn’t I leave then?

Instead, I took one step to my left, so I could see inside. And . . . it wasn’t Callie.

Daphne was sitting on Coach’s desk, her back to me. And she was completely naked. I could see her tennis tank top and skirt crumpled up on the floor. And Coach Townsend was standing in between her legs. His hands braced on her hips. And he was . . . inside of her. And Daphne was moaning and had her arms wrapped around the coach’s neck.

They were having sex. I was watching them have sex.

Alex closed her eyes and put a hand over her face. She shook her head again and then lowered her hand and looked back at the camera.

At first, I was just trying to make sense of what I was seeing. I mean, obviously I knew what was happening. But they were doing it right there, in his office, where anyone could walk in and see them. Why would they take the risk?

I told myself to move, to get away before they realized I was there. But then two thoughts occurred to me. One, what they were doing was very, very wrong. And two, no one would ever believe me that it happened.

Before I knew what I was doing, I reached for my phone. I opened up the camera app, hit the red button, and started to record them. It was only, like, twenty seconds, but it felt like an eternity. Then I turned and slipped away before they saw me.