Lies She Told(57)

He examines the image and then stares back at me, comparing features. Recognition sparkles in his eyes. He flicks the card with his finger. “I read Drowned Secrets. Good book.”





Chapter 14

Victoria sleeps in her bassinet, body positioned for a police pat down. Her arms are raised in a stick-’em-up position. Her legs are spread. Yet there’s no tension in her expression. Her bow mouth is untied. Her lids are closed without fluttering. She does not have bad dreams.

Fatigue weighs on my eyelids. REM is not an option. I know Colleen waits for me in my subconscious, bloody and beaten. Banquo’s ghost, prepared to accuse me of murder and usurp my position as Victoria’s mother.

I need to think like the detectives. They are questioning Jake. They must suspect murder. They’ve seen the blood-soaked floor. And Jake must be a suspect. He was the last known person to see Colleen alive. I’m certain to land on the short list, too, if anyone figures out that I knew of his affair.

Although, how would they discover that? Jake thinks he’s slipped everything past me. My mother believes she’s lying about my whereabouts to cover up an indiscretion with a coworker. The only person who knows that I knew is Tyler. Surely he wouldn’t say anything. He was my shrink, after all—though sleeping together probably voided any doctor-patient confidentiality agreement. If a policeman came to his door asking questions, would he say he treated me? Would he confess everything?

I need to find out. I grab my house line off the nightstand and call his office. He answers on the third ring.

“Hello. Dr. Tyler Williams.”

“It’s Beth.”

“Oh, hi. Did everything go all right last night?”

“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Are you free at all today?”

His voice drops. “Did you tell him anything?”

If I say no, he’ll assume that he’s safe and won’t see me. “Can we meet?”

“I have one more appointment for the day coming up in twenty minutes.”

“I’ll see you in an hour and half then. I’ll come to your office.”




*


Tyler doesn’t leave me loitering. He’s waiting at the door. As soon as I get within fifty feet of his office, he waves me and the stroller through like a frantic traffic director and locks the door behind us. His facial expression does not befit a shrink. Visible worry lines crease his brow as he motions to his couch. I push the stroller around to the side of the room and then settle down on the sofa, hoping he’ll sit beside me.

He takes his usual chair. “So what happened?”

No “nice to see you.” He only cares about how close my husband is to filing malpractice charges. “I didn’t tell Jake anything. I didn’t even go home last night. I went to my mother’s house. She has assured me that, if Jake asks, she’ll claim I was there all night.”

He scratches his neat goatee. “But she knows something occurred.”

“She believes I went out for drinks with a male coworker after Jake stood me up. I’ve made sure, the best I can, that this won’t come back to you.”

His expression relaxes. “Thank you.” He starts to rise from his chair, hand extended, as though we’ve made a business deal to bury our rendezvous and all that remains is to shake on it. Me, bare-skinned beneath his body, can be deleted from his memory.

“I apologize for all this,” he says.

“The police came to my apartment this morning.”

Tyler slumps back into his chair. His Adam’s apple bobs.

“Jake’s girlfriend is missing. Apparently, she was supposed to meet a friend late last night for drinks and didn’t show. A neighbor found blood outside her apartment and called the cops.”

Images of the stained floor overpower me like an unseen wave. I am caught without enough air. I start gasping. Hyperventilating. Suddenly, Tyler is beside me, brandishing a paper bag from the ether. He places it over my mouth, a parent securing a child’s oxygen mask on a plane going down.

“Just breathe.” His palm, warm and wide, rubs my back. A few long inhalations and I’m ready to speak again. I focus on the feel of his body next to mine. I can get through this. I have to concentrate on Tyler.

“The cops came to the house to question Jake,” I continue. “I’m sure he was with her last night. That’s why he cancelled our date last minute.”

A real sob escapes, even as I lie by implication. The weight of my actions threatens to crush me. If only Colleen weren’t dead. If only I could go back to when I discovered the affair and confront them both in that restaurant, tell her that she could have my cheating spouse. I’d gladly give him up now.

Tyler takes my hand in his larger palm. He strokes my fingers. For a moment, I close my eyes, remembering his touch from the night before. He’d made me feel beautiful. Worthy.

“Do you feel safe?”

“No.” I take a halting breath.

“You think he did something?”

Of course he did something! His betrayal made me a murderer! I clear my throat, making way for the lies to slip out. “Jake was always kind of violent and controlling. I never said anything because I was embarrassed. If his girlfriend threatened to leave him or to tell me what was going on, I could see him flipping out. He didn’t know I knew.” I gasp, my best imitation of a horror movie victim. “If he finds out where I really was last night . . .”