Landon & Shay: Part Two (L&S Duet #2)(72)

Lane’s worried expression dissipated as she nodded. “Oh, yes. Well, when we bring in PAs for actors, we try to keep the name of the individual under wraps. It keeps fanatics away.”

“Right, of course.”

“Wait here and let me check if Sarah is ready.” I stood still outside of the trailer as Lane hurried inside. When she popped her head back in, she waved me over. “Come on in, Shay.”

I walked up the steps of the trailer, and to my surprise, it was much bigger than I assumed from the outside looking in. There was a large sofa, small kitchen with a mini fridge, and a dining room table. Toward the back of the trailer was an area for hair and makeup, which was where Sarah currently was standing.

“Oh my gosh, you must be Shay!” she exclaimed, standing up with rollers still in her hair as her small frame was wrapped in a robe. “Get in here,” she said, waving me in for a hug.

I wrapped my arms around her, and even though it was the weirdest moment of my life, it was truly exciting, too.

“It’s nice to meet you,” she said, pulling back to give me a once-over. “What’s your zodiac sign?” she asked.

“Uh, um, Aquarius,” I said, being thrown off by her question.

“Oh yes, I get that vibe from you. You are definitely an Aquarius. It feels good to be around your energy. I’m a Gemini, so it makes sense why it feels this good.”

I smiled, not having a dang clue in the world what she was going on about. “Yeah, totally.”

She placed her hands against my cheeks and stared at me for five minutes too long, and I tried my best to not be completely thrown off by the odd exchange. But honestly, how could I not be? It was…weird. To say the least.

“Can you do something for me?” she asked, finally dropping her hold against my face.

“Sure, of course.”

“Can you hold my balls?”

Uh, come again?

“Excuse me?” I hoped I had a decent poker face, because having Sarah Freaking Sims ask me to hold her balls felt extremely awkward.

“Well, my crystals. I like to call them my balls, seeing how I like to rub them more than a pair of actual balls.” She winked.

I relaxed a little more. Sure, Sarah was odd, but at the same time she was kind of charming. In a very weird way.

She walked over to her table, grabbed her balls, and came back to me. I held my hands out and she placed them in my hands, wrapping my fingers around her cryst—err—balls.

She stepped back, clasping her hands together, grinning at me as if she were a proud mama watching her kid’s graduation.

“How does it feel?” she questioned, her eyes wide with intrigue.

“Um,” I hesitated, completely unaware of how I was supposed to answer that.

She waved her hand at me. “There is no wrong answer. Go on. Just first thing that pops into your mind.”

“Well, they are…warm.”

“Yes.” She sighed, pleased by my answer. “My balls are warm.”

Good Lord, was I being Punk’d? Was Ashton Kutcher about to pop out of the trailer bathroom?

“What else, Shay?”

“Smooth. They are smooth.”

“Soo freaking smooth,” she moaned, way too into this than she should’ve been. “Now hum to them.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“You know, hum. Close your eyes and hum. Then lightly blow on my balls.”

That awkward moment when you found out that one of your idols was a freaking psychopath.

But alas, I was in need of a job, and if that meant humming to two balls, then by all means was I going to hum my heart out.

I shut my eyes and right as I was about to push my lips together to hum out a tune, chuckling erupted in the room.

I opened my eyes and raised an eyebrow as Sarah, her hair designer, and her makeup artist all stood there laughing at me.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, just a joke. We don’t hum at the stones. That would be silly. I just wanted to see how far you’d be willing to go with my crazy requests.”

I breathed out a breath of air. “Oh, well, okay.” Obviously, I’d go as far as blowing on her balls. That was the level of desperate I was sitting at.

“I think we are going to have fun working together,” Sarah remarked, taking the stones from my hands. “And it’s clear that you have a lot of dedication, so I think we’ll get along just fine. Have a seat, and I’ll give you the list of tasks that Lane typed up for you.”

“I’m sorry, are we not…interviewing for the position?”

“Interviewing? Oh no, honey, you’ve already been hired.” She cocked an eyebrow. “I’m sorry, I thought I made that clear. It wasn’t much of a question that you’d be hired, since your name was given to us by one of my favorite people.”

“I’m sorry, given to you?”

“Yes. You came with the highest referral. Honestly, with your background in being a barista, and your coffee girl latte crazy fiasco, I was even more excited to work with you. I mean, if I had a dollar for every time a terrible story about me went viral, I’d be rich.” She paused. “—Er. I’d be richer. Anyway, I really trust you, seeing how Landon spoke so highly.”

My stomach dropped. “Did you say Landon?”