Just the Nicest Couple(40)

“Can I get you something?” Lily asks, breaking my reverie, and I feel instantly sick for thinking like that. I’m not a killer. I could never kill someone. Could I?

This whole thing has spiraled out of control, turning me into someone I’m not.

Nina follows Lily to the kitchen. Lily is still talking. “Water, tea?” she asks.

There’s this slight tremor to Lily’s voice. I hear it, but I wonder if Nina does.

Nina and Jake have been to our house for dinner before. It was after we’d been to theirs and saw the way they lived. Lily was reluctant to have them over; she felt self-conscious, as if our almost three thousand square foot, waterfront home was something to be ashamed of. She went all out getting things ready, cleaning and buying new stuff for the house. I remember saying something to her at the time like, if they’re the good friends we think they are, they won’t mind our average quality dishes and furniture, but Lily wanted everything just right.

“No. Thanks. I tried calling you,” Nina says, still wearing her coat. “You didn’t answer.”

“Oh?” Lily glances back over her shoulder. “I didn’t notice. I’m so sorry. My phone must be on silent. Is everything okay?”

“No. It’s not, Lily,” she says, and then Nina turns to see me following them into the kitchen. Her expression is unreadable. I force a smile, something that belies my terror and looks more like concern, though inside I’m fucking scared. My heart is a cheetah.

We come into the kitchen. Lily says, “Oh no, Nina,” and she goes to the fridge to get Nina water anyway, despite her saying that she didn’t want any. “What happened? Is it your mother?”

“No,” Nina says. “It’s Jake.”

Lily says, “Sit, please. Here,” while setting the bottle of water on the table. “Can I get you anything to eat?”

“No. I’m fine. Something has happened, Lily,” she says, looking again in my direction, and I’m certain that something is me. “Do you mind giving Lily and me a minute, Christian?” she asks, and I’m taken aback by her candor. She stares at me, and then says, “I don’t mean to be rude, but I was hoping I could talk to Lily alone.”

“Oh yeah, sure,” I say. “No problem.”

Lily and I exchange a look. She doesn’t want to be left alone with Nina any more than I want to leave her alone with Nina. I don’t have a choice. I move from the kitchen to the stairs, climbing them and, when I get to the top, I stand there, listening, waiting for Nina to tell Lily that I was in their house this morning, as if Lily doesn’t already know that. She came as a courtesy to tell Lily first, because they’re friends, before she goes to the police.

I hold my breath. The wind outside is still loud, whipping around the corners of the house. It’s begun to rain, the rain spitting against the windows. It makes it hard to hear Nina’s voice. The house is dark. We don’t have any lights on. It’s the middle of the day but, with the weather as it is, it’s dim like dusk.

Lily asks again, “Are you sure you don’t want to sit?”

“No. I’m sure.”

“What’s going on Nina? You’re scaring me.”

“When you and I were at breakfast, someone came into my house,” Nina says.

“Who?”

“It was Jake.”

My knees practically collapse. I’m floored. Not being able to identify me is one thing, but mistaking me for Jake is something I hadn’t expected.

“Jake?” Lily asks. She’s unable to keep the shock out of her voice. But it’s okay because her shock is warranted. It would be shocking if Jake came home when they were at breakfast, after being missing for all these days.

“Yes,” Nina says. “Jake.”

“How do you know?”

“My mother. She saw him.”

“What did he say?” she asks. “What was he doing there? Is he still there now? Is he home?”

“No,” Nina says. “He didn’t say anything to my mother. He came, and then left again.”

Lily says, “Oh God. I’m so sorry, Nina. What do you think he wanted?”

Nina is exasperated. “Who the hell knows. He was in his office, my mother said, looking for something. He didn’t come for me.”

“Oh, Nina,” Lily says. It’s warm, sensitive. Silence follows and I imagine Lily putting her arms around Nina, embracing her. Thirty seconds or so pass, and then Lily says, “Look on the positive side: You know he’s fine, right? He’s not hurt. He’s not missing, like you thought. Maybe he just needs some time to come to his senses. Every relationship needs the occasional break. What’s that they say? Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”

Nina is quiet at first. I’d give anything to still be in the kitchen with them. I want to see her face as she considers Lily’s words.

“Maybe you’re right,” she says after a while.

I like how Lily does that, how she turns the conversation into something encouraging. She found a bright spot. Even if it is a bald-faced lie.

The road at night is dark. Lily and I waited until after ten o’clock to leave, knowing the streets would be quieter. In my car, I drive Lily to the place where Jake’s car is parked. When we get to it, I pull to the side of the road, directly behind him. I shift the car into Park, and then my hands fall away from the steering wheel. Lily angles her body toward mine, and I put my hand on her knee.