Jade Fire Gold(101)

The gods.

No—no, no, no.

My fingers find the gritty ground.

Gritty, like sand.





48


Ahn


Chilly air drifts into my bedchamber from a window left ajar. Shivering, I try to sit up. The effect of the empress’s noxious tea is wearing off, but something feels different. I flex my fingers. My magic has not returned. The poison in the tea must have blocked my qì somehow.

The weight of the empress’s revelations lies heavy in my mind. I can’t save Ama and Altan without killing my father. But could I kill my father? The Heavens would shun me for such a sin, but haven’t the gods already cursed me from the beginning? And will Altan be sacrificed to save our land?

That paralyzing despair threatens to return, but I fight it. Bit by bit, I regain control of my body. I grit my teeth and limp toward the doors. I need to find Linxi, and I need to get a message to Altan and Tang Wei.

Before I can get to the doors, someone else flings them open. An attendant. I’ve never seen this girl before.

“Who are you? What do you want, and where is Linxi?” I demand.

“I’m sorry, my lady. I haven’t seen her. The sun has not risen, perhaps she is asleep.”

“Never mind.” I try to brush past her, but she doesn’t budge. “Get out of my way.”

In response, she jabs two points on my left shoulder with her fingers. There’s a sharp, tingling feeling in my spine. I struggle to move, but it feels like there are weights tied to my feet.

“I’m sorry, but I have orders to take you to the premier.” She doesn’t sound sorry at all.

She must be a henchman of my father’s passing as a lady-inwaiting. Maybe she’s a priest. And if she’s allowed to manhandle me this way, something must be very wrong.

“How do you expect me to get to him if you’ve paralyzed me?”

She sidesteps and twists my arm behind my back with a swing. I yelp in pain. Her grip tightens, and she twists harder. Something cold and sharp presses up on my throat.

“This is my favorite blade. I keep it sharp and your flesh is so tender,” she drawls, her breath wispy against my neck. “I’ll release your meridian points, but know that any false move, any thought of escape, and I’ll slice you up faster than your damned magic can work. Do we have an understanding?”

She doesn’t know that Zhenxi’s tea has disabled my magic. At the back of her mind, she must be afraid of what my life-stealing affinity can do.

“Sure,” I say, nonchalantly flexing my fingers. Her blade tenses against my neck. “Don’t worry, I won’t waste my energy on you. Now, release me. I don’t want to keep my father waiting.”

The girl lowers her weapon and taps the base of my spine three times. I stagger as the feeling in my legs returns. She escorts me through the darkened corridors, weapon in one hand, lamp in the other. We pass guards and other attendants, but no one gives us notice. Or at least, they pretend not to. I catch a wayward glance or two and pray that word will spread to Tai Shun. But would he even know what to do? My heart twists as I think of Linxi. What has the empress done with her?

I notice that we’re turning too many corners. This isn’t the way to my father’s chambers or study. “Where are we going?”

The girl doesn’t respond. We walk on in silence past the northern wing into an open field. Ahead, a huge stone wall rises.

It’s dawn. Light arches over the horizon, silhouetting a figure strung up high between two tall poles on top of the wall. The young man is shirtless, his rust-orange pants bloodied. His head hangs, dark hair flowing in the wind.

A white streak gleaming in the sun.





49


Altan


How long have I been screaming? Hours, days . . . seconds?

Time holds no weight in darkness.

All I know is I’m hoarse, my fists wet, blood dripping from flesh skinned and pulpy from hitting the walls. All I feel is that suffocating pressure. All I hear is my mother’s endless screaming.

Sand has stopped pouring in.

I’m chest-deep in it, but it is enough to break me. Memories of my father, my sister, Shīfù, that young boy stolen from his mother’s arms, countless other faces—they blend into the toxic brew fermenting in my head.

Everyone I have lost.

Everyone I failed.

The stitches holding me together have begun to loosen. To fray. What will they reveal when I finally fall apart?

Ahn’s voice sheens through the pall. Forgive yourself. How?

Darkness has no answer. And I can’t find the light.

Metal grates sharply. I wince as light bounces in from a small rectangular opening in the door.

A face veiled in shadow peers in.

Keys jangle. Bolts screech back. The door cranks open and sand rushes out. I pin myself against the wall, trying not to fall with the sand. Or into it.

Disoriented, I’m defenseless, vulnerable. But the figure doesn’t attack.

“Cousin, it’s me.”

The last person I thought I’d see here.

I stagger out on floundering legs, ignoring Tai Shun’s outstretched hand. Hunched over, I fight down the urge to scream. Some part of me is still lost in that dark cell. I need to gather myself. To find myself again.

As my lungs fill, my mind starts to clear. Barely.