Intimacies(27)

I only wanted to ask how you were, he said. He sounded affronted, and immediately I was made to feel as if I were overreacting. He clasped his hands together in a manner that was unnatural and then a little threatening. I imagine this is difficult for you.

It’s fine, I said curtly.

Is it? But perhaps you are right. He paused, eyes scanning my face avidly. Adriaan is unlikely to succeed. Gaby is very wrapped up in this new man of hers.

It was as if I had taken a blow to the chest. I don’t think I understand, I said.

Understand what? It’s as I said. He won’t win her back.

But he’s—

What, still in love with her? It certainly is a gesture, rushing off to Portugal. Gaby called me that very evening, she found the entire thing quite irrational and inconvenient, it seems her new man is prone to fits of jealousy. I recoiled a little as he repeated the phrase new man, his voice salacious and excitable. He shook his head and waggled his finger at me. He’s thrown a spanner in the works, our friend Adriaan, turning up as he has. And of course the children—he trailed off, evidently the children were a matter too pedestrian to be discussed.

I suppose the children must be happy to see him, I said. My mouth was dry, my words cold and halting.

Yes, well—children are, aren’t they? He rushed on, despite the fact that his words made little sense. But enough about Adriaan, he said with a grin as he lurched in my direction. I wondered if I could take you for a drink?

I was both deadened and amazed by the man’s audacity, his technique was remarkably repetitive, it was the same strategy every time, he capitalized on disorientation. The entire thing was so threadbare and at the same time it was not ineffective, I did find myself disoriented, if not in the way he hoped. I excused myself and hurried out of the building, collecting my bag from the security guard. I took out my phone and texted Adriaan, Are you okay? He wrote back at once, Yes, fine. And then nothing further.

I didn’t know what to do, still less what to believe. Adriaan had already told me that things with Gaby were complicated and as the days became weeks and now a full month it had of course occurred to me that the situation between them was becoming more rather than less entrenched. Was it possible that he had changed his mind? Wasn’t it possible that he had told me something less than the truth? This was not what I had hoped, I was now aware that I was in a precarious position. Had Jana asked me then how things were with Adriaan, I might have told her any number of things: that I didn’t really know, that I had moved into his apartment, that the entire thing was on the verge of fizzling out or close enough.

But she didn’t ask, at least not in that particular moment. She was accompanied by an elegant woman I did not recognize, stylishly dressed, the kind of woman I might have surreptitiously admired in the street. This is Eline, Jana said, I wanted you to meet. The woman smiled as she took my hand and although I was distracted I felt at once that I liked her. Were you very bored? Jana asked. I shook my head, No, I only became preoccupied with this painting, I pointed to the Leyster and said, Somehow I had never noticed it before.

The Proposition, Jana said. As it’s usually called. It’s a beautiful piece. Leyster was a singular case—she was one of the first women in the Guild, and she achieved some renown during her lifetime. But after her death many of her paintings were misattributed, it was only at the end of the nineteenth century that the error was corrected. And then? I asked. Jana shrugged. Well, her paintings are here. I suppose she has some reputation, though it’s still less than she deserves. I nodded, I saw that Eline was also examining the painting. Are you done? I asked Jana, and she shook her head, No, I need to go back. But you’re staying for the dinner? I nodded, Jana was already retreating, I saw that she had wanted to introduce Eline to me in part so that we would each have the other to speak to.

Jana has a gift for friendship, Eline said. She insists upon it. We both laughed. Her words were gentle but forthright and there was an immediate ease between us. In the brief pause that followed, I realized that Jana had left without establishing any common ground between us, I knew nothing about the woman who stood beside me. As we began walking, Eline indicated the paintings in the gallery. They have such an air of perfect tranquility, but it was not a period without upheaval. The Dutch Empire was rapidly expanding, in many ways these paintings have to be read in that context. The relentless domesticity of these quiet interiors takes on a different meaning seen in that light, she said. It means something, to face inward, to turn your back on the storm brewing outside.

I said that she seemed to know a great deal about the period, and she smiled. I’m an art historian, I teach at the university. It’s surprising that I didn’t meet Jana earlier, The Hague is such a small place and its art world even smaller, but I suppose she hasn’t been here so long. I was of course aware of her appointment, she added. As we continued through the galleries, slowly returning to Jana’s exhibition, I asked her what she thought of the show. She’s done an excellent job, Eline said. Of the exhibition and of the position as a whole. It’s not an easy thing, what she’s being asked to do. She needs to modernize the institution, but she also needs to keep us art historians satisfied. I asked if that was how they met and she said, No, we met in another way altogether, it was quite unexpected. She didn’t say anything further, and I didn’t feel that I could press her, there were any number of ways the two of them might have met, as she had said, The Hague was a small place.