In The Afterlight (The Darkest Minds, #3)(23)

“Come on,” she said. “If anyone was here, they must have peaced out days ago.”

“There were tracks in the mud on the drive in,” I said, wondering if my words sounded more solid than my thoughts did. I started toward the door that led into the house, only to be stopped short by the sight of the padlock hanging from it.

Cole honked the horn, and it was the slap in the face I needed.

You are acting crazy, I thought. Pull yourself together. There are more important things—

No. No there weren’t. Because the truth of it was, I would have walked here. I would have walked here all the way from Los Angeles, alone in the dark in the pouring rain, if it had meant finding Zu again. I wanted it that badly—I needed to know she was safe and that she was okay, and that I hadn’t failed her the way I’d failed all of the others.

Even the part of me that had expected this felt sad and small and foolish as I followed Vida out. I was glad for the rain now; anything to hide the fact that one wrong word, one bad stray thought, would push me to tears.

Vida put her hands on her hips, surveying the dark line of trees that formed a high wall around the house. “This would be a good place to crash for a couple days. I saw the signs too, you know. And I think if you hadn’t come and looked, it would have bugged the shit out of you forever.”

“Sorry to drag you out here,” I mumbled. Vida waved me off as she moved back toward the other car. Liam had left his door open, and the light inside gave me a clear view of two very concerned faces.

Vida stopped in her tracks, slowly bent down at the edge of the driveway, and picked something up—something white and filthy with mud. “Hey boo,” she called, tossing it over to me. My fingers were shaking and slick with rain, but I somehow managed to catch it.

It was a small shoe, clearly kid-sized. The white fabric was nearly black with mud and grime, but the laces were still a rosy shade of pink, like not even dirt could put a damper on it. I studied it, running my fingers over the swirled stitching along its side.

Cole made it perfectly clear my hijacking of our drive was over. He’d taken my place behind the wheel, and was in the process of rolling down his window when I tossed the shoe back onto the ground and said, “I know, I know.”

My whole body shook with how hard my teeth were chattering. Cole took pity on me and redirected the warm air blowing from the vents my way, but he didn’t say a word, and I didn’t offer to start the conversation, either.

That shoe...God, that shoe with those curling pink laces...

Vida swung the car around, taking the lead on the drive back out to the main road. Cole followed, fiddling with the radio as the truck’s headlights cut through the trees and foliage. There was a flash of movement as some kind of animal darted away.

“All right,” Cole said. “Do you have any idea where we are? Did you see a city name? Gem?”

My mind was fixed on the shoe, obsessing over the stitching, how it had felt warm despite the chilled air and rain, and those laces, those pink laces were like something out of—

I sucked in a gasp loud and sharp enough to startle Cole into hitting the brakes. “What? What?”

But I was already scrambling to unbuckle my seat belt, already jumping back out into the rain, running back up toward the house.

I knew those laces. I had picked those shoes out because of them. I’d dug down deep into that bin at Wal-Mart because I knew she’d love them, I knew—

The gunshot that boomed out, echoing in the dark mountains around us, was the only thing that could have stopped me—and it did. My momentum carried me forward, my feet sliding through the mud as I threw up my hands in the air. Both cars had stopped; Cole used the open driver’s-side door of the truck to try to stop Liam and Vida from blowing past him. What guns we had were drawn and pointed into the trees.

I took another small step forward. I wasn’t thinking about skip tracers or PSFs or the National Guard or even the home’s owners. I was thinking about how terrifying it would be for a kid hiding out in those woods, not knowing who was stalking around one of the few places they thought were safe.

They hadn’t shot me dead yet. That was a good sign at least.

“Zu...?” I called, raising my voice above the rain ruffling the trees.

No response.

“Zu?” I yelled, taking another step forward. “Suzume? Zu?”

The forest seemed to let out a long sigh around me, settling back down into the night. If someone was there, it wasn’t her. She would have come.

Wouldn’t she?

I felt a sharp twist of despair low in my gut as I started backing away. “Okay,” I said. “Okay, I’m sorry—we’re going.”

Glancing back over my shoulder, I saw Cole lower his gun. I saw Liam come around the door to stand next to him, stretching a hand out in my direction, only to drop it back to his side. He took another step forward only to stop, his eyes flashing wide.

And when I turned back toward the woods, she was the only thing I saw.

A blur of white and pink and black burst out from the shelter of the trees, away from the pale arms that tried to snatch her shirt and haul her back. Gangly limbs slipped and slid through the mud, covering the space between us so quickly I barely had time to get my arms up.

Zu slammed into me with the kind of force that should have tilted the world onto its side. I fell back, taking her with me, letting out a noise that was halfway between a laugh and a sob as I wrapped my arms around her. She buried her face against my hair and all but wilted against me. Every limb in her body went lax, like she was molding herself to me.