If I Never Met You(97)
Laurie hooted. ‘Not true.’ She paused. ‘Singlehood. I’m quite nervous about the idea of being with someone new.’
‘It’ll be grand. Like riding a bicycle.’
He had a friendly face, a kind face. Was Jamie going to go home with that girl?
‘You’re so pretty,’ Angus repeated.
‘Thanks.’
Angus leaned down and put his mouth on hers, and Laurie only processed she was about to be kissed, once the kiss had begun. She responded at a delay, feeling as if she was standing outside herself and observing what it was like with someone unfamiliar, who moved their mouth differently. It was neither unpleasant nor that great, she decided. One milestone passed though. The first kiss after Dan.
A coughing, right by them, and they moved apart. Jamie was watching them, holding Laurie’s coat.
‘Shall I get you your taxi? Looks like you’ve had enough,’ Jamie said, and with his tone of voice, Angus said, ‘Right ho,’ and made himself very scarce, very fast.
Jamie whisked Laurie round the corner, propelling rather than holding her, and when he was sure they were alone, said: ‘What the actual fuck? Remember the whole thing about no cheating during our dating? It being a humiliation for the other person? And the Christmas party being kind of important?’
He looked utterly furious and Laurie found herself stuttering apologies.
‘Seriously, outside the Christmas party? Are you for fucking real?’
‘Sorry,’ Laurie said hanging her head like a naughty schoolgirl. ‘I’m really sorry. I didn’t think.’
Jamie stared at her, as much it seemed in disbelief as fury.
‘Thank God it was only me who saw, I guess. And I don’t matter.’
‘Well. Neither do I.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘You’re drunk,’ Jamie said, but she wasn’t, and he knew she wasn’t, and it was merely a welcome way out for both of them.
40
Torrential rain, the emphatic Manchester sort, the size of stair rods and sounding strong enough to break glass, bucketed down. It was as if the weather had reacted to what she’d done. The sky had exploded, the way Jamie did.
At home, Laurie lay down on the sofa, kicking her shoes off, feet hooked over the arm. She should take the dress off but she couldn’t bring herself to de-Cinderella yet, it might be years before she wore this again. Then she got up, lit some candles and put a Prince compilation on.
He was completely within his rights to let fly at her, she’d been reckless and selfish. She was trying to escape from herself, and everyone’s expectations, and their deal was collateral in testing what it felt like to tart about.
She couldn’t shift the sense she and Jamie were broadcasting on multiple frequencies now, that things were no longer necessarily about what they were about. Emily’s prophecies kept on coming true.
Ding-dong.
Laurie’s heart went bang and she sat up straight. She knew who it was at the door; knew, and yet pretended to herself she didn’t. If it was anyone else, her dismay would swallow her. In that split second, she’d learned something about herself.
‘It’s Jamie.’
She slid the bolt. THANK GOD, and, OH NO.
She opened the door: he was drenched, water running from hairline down his face, coat wrapped round himself like a dressing gown. The clematis over the porch had a small waterfall pouring from it.
‘Hello,’ he said.
‘Hi.’
A short pause, Laurie’s pulse still thundering in her ears.
‘Do you want to come in?’
‘It’d be better than being out here.’
She stood back as he brushed past, soaked enough that he left a wet streak on her dress.
‘Do you want a towel or something?’ Laurie followed him into the front room trying to keep her voice even, trying to conceal how jittery she was.
‘Yeah, if I can?’
Laurie ran upstairs and grabbed one from the bathroom rail. She handed it to Jamie, who patted his face and hair ineffectually.
‘Take the coat off and I’ll stick it on the radiator,’ Laurie said, trying not to notice the wet white shirt underneath.
‘Lovely house,’ he said, glancing round.
‘Thank you, I’m still paying for it,’ Laurie said, smiling. ‘Maybe in more than one way.’
‘It looks exactly like the one on that Oasis album cover.’
‘Ha. Yep. Not entirely unintentional. Maybe I have some of my father in me after all.’
They smiled at each other. Laurie took the towel back and held it over her arms, a small barrier. There was an excruciating silence.
‘Did you know they wanted cans of Red Stripe on that album cover, instead of the red wine, but they weren’t allowed the product placement?’
Stop wittering, Laurie! And he’s turned up on your doorstep, it’s for him to announce his business and fill awkward pauses. I am scared about what he’s going to say.
‘I didn’t know that. Are you some sort of an Oasis superfan?’
‘No! I liked that … décor.’
Jamie gazed at the floor.
‘I’m sorry to turn up like this. I’m sorry I shouted at you. Only, I’ve been turning it over and over in my head. I need to know why you kissed that bloke. I can’t work it out at all.’