Iced Out (Leighton U #1)(86)

“Or maybe you’re still using them.” I murmur, the pieces of the puzzle coming together in my head. “And the day of the drug test, you swapped the samples. Yours for mine, so you’d pass and I wouldn’t.”

“What are you talking about?” he asks, his head tilting to the side. “You didn’t even test positive for narcotics. It was steroids.”

“No,” I growl, my teeth grinding as I grab the bottle from him again. “I just let you think it was because I didn’t see the point in arguing with you about something like which drug they popped me for.” I hold the bottle up between us, showing him the label. “This drug. Which I didn’t fucking use, by the way. I was always clean, always fucking will be.”

Oakley’s mouth drops open slightly as his brows furrow, and I can see the wheels spinning in his head. “So wait…you tested positive for narcotics instead?”

“Stop acting like you didn’t know!” I shout and throw the bottle across the room, where it hits the wall before clattering to the floor. “I saw the look on your face when I found those. You fucking knew. You had to have known.”

He stares at me like he’s seen a ghost, his head shaking back and forth at a snail’s pace. I don’t know if it’s part of his denial, or maybe he’s trying to process what’s happening, but either way, it does nothing for me. It gives me no answers.

“Look me in the eye and tell me you didn’t know,” I demand slowly. “If you’re gonna lie, then you can lie to my fucking face.”

“Quinn, please—”

“Just answer the question,” I snarl, cutting off whatever plea he was about to make. “Did you know? That’s the only information I want.”

Oakley’s eyes sink closed, and there’s a faint crack in my chest. Because the look on his face…it’s answer enough. To the point where I could just leave and save myself the trouble.

But even if the words aren’t necessary to know, I still need to hear them.

From his lying fucking mouth, I need the truth.

“I knew something was up. Braxton was talking all weird, and I asked him straight up if he did something, but all he said was I was looking out for you or some shit. I didn’t…” He trails off, rubbing the back of his neck as he shakes his head. “I had no idea he actually did it.”

“But you had suspicions.”

“Yeah, but—”

“But nothing!” I shout. “What the actual fuck were you thinking, Oakley? How could you not say something if you thought he—”

“Because he’s one of my best friends, and I didn’t know anything for sure!”

And then it all falls into place. It makes sense. And more than anything, I’m pissed at myself for not seeing it sooner.

Not realizing I was being played for a fucking fool this entire time.

“He’s your best friend…and I’m your rival. Your enemy. The only thing standing in your way of being captain. The pain in your ass teammate you can’t stand to be around.”

I roll my tongue along the inside of my cheek and silently beg my temper to stay under control. Beg for a break in the anger so I can breathe through the pain shattering my entire body from his betrayal.

But that’s the thing. It wasn’t a betrayal to him.

It was all part of a plan.

“What, was he in on all of it?” I ask, allowing the lies and deceit to sink in deeper. “Is he the reason you changed your mind about this whole fucking thing—you, me, the hook-ups?”

Is he the reason I made the mistake of falling in love with you?

“No, Quinn. I wouldn’t ever…” He trails off, shaking his head frantically. “Just no. I kept my word with the rules. No one knows.”

“Kept your word,” I repeat with a scoff. “Well, I’m glad to know some things are sacred at least. Just not hockey, apparently. Which is hilarious, all things considered.”

I bare my teeth at him, the agony ripping me apart from the inside out. It cuts and slices through me, making it nearly impossible to breathe, until I’m left suffocating and bleeding out on the floor at his feet.

“But then again, you wanted to set yourself apart from Coach and your dad, right? Well, congratulations. You did it, Oak,” I snarl, ice dripping from my words. “Because neither of them would’ve ever dreamed of pulling the shit you have. You should be proud of yourself.”

The words crack and shatter as they leave my lips right along with my heart while I spew venom and hatred at him, desperately trying to hurt him the same way he’s hurt me. Dig blades into his heart, knives into his soul, and watch him bleed like I am.

But the problem about loving the very thing you hate is it destroys you to hurt it in return.

And as my words sink in past his armor, I feel every slash and wound like it’s my own skin they’re seeping into.

“I can’t believe I was actually allowing myself to fa—” I cut the words off when they start to crack with more truths. Ones he doesn’t deserve to hear.

Calamity stains my voice until it no longer sounds like my own, and the words rip from my throat with palpable amounts of anguish.

“But that’s just it, right? Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”