Iced Out (Leighton U #1)(28)

“I think we should…” I trail off, scrubbing my hand over my face.

Fuck, this is so much harder than I thought.

Quinton’s eyebrow raises as he drops his phone to his lap. “You think we should what, Reed?”

My eyes meet his as I sit on the edge of my bed across from him. The nerves I was feeling before have only multiplied in the passing minutes, and I can’t see them going away anytime soon.

I hate it.

This lack of control is new, and I’m not at all comfortable with the way he ties my stomach in knots for no reason at all lately.

“We should do it.”

His lips twitch, clearly amused. “Do what, exactly?”

Oh, Jesus fucking Christ.

I aim a glare his way. “Don’t play coy with me, de Haas. You know exactly what I’m trying to say.”

“No, I don’t think I do. Because it sounds an awful lot like you’re wanting to put some stock in this superstition after all. Which would be crazy, considering you said it would…” He trails off, tapping his hand on his leg. “Oh, that’s right. Never happen in this lifetime, I think you said?”

“Quinton.”

“Oakley.”

The shit-eating grin on his face is more than pissing me off. Then again, I can’t blame him for tossing this back in my face when I literally told him it would never happen. Now, here I am, crawling back to him and asking to revisit his offer.

My eyes sink closed, and I sigh. “I think we should do it, meaning I think at least trying out your theory wouldn’t hurt any more than we’re already hurting.”

When he doesn’t respond right away, I blink open to find him staring, a hint of amusement in his eyes while he waits for me to spell it out for him. Which I do.

If only for the good of the team.

“Us hooking up, being your theory,” I grind out through clenched teeth. “So if you’re still in, we can try it.”

One corner of his lips curls into a sinful smirk, popping a dimple out on one side of his mouth I never knew he had. It seems so out of place on him. So innocent and cute for a person who’s as short-fused as he is.

He lifts his body into a sitting position before scooting over to the edge of his bed until he’s directly in front of me too.

“Be real for a second. Are you fucking with me right now?”

I shake my head. “No. I might’ve lost my damn mind, but I’m not fucking with you.”

His smirk turns into a full-blown grin then. “What made you change your mind?”

My brow lifts. “It’s not obvious?”

“We’ve lost two games since we hooked-up at the frat house.” He shrugs. “I just figured you didn’t care enough to do anything about it.”

“You know that’s not true. I’m the captain. Of course I care if we win or lose. It’s why…” I sigh, rubbing the back of my neck. “It’s why I think we need to try this. I feel like I owe it to the team to do whatever it takes to turn our season around, like you’d said.”

“Even if it means sleeping with me?” he notes, a slight lilt of amusement in his tone. “A teammate and a baby bi? Doesn’t that break these rules you’re so fond of?”

I pin him with a glare. “Don’t make me fucking regret this, de Haas. Call this an exception to the rule. They still stand in general, and the second this doesn’t work out and we lose, there won’t be an exception anymore. I’m not looking to get you into bed; only to win some games this season.”

A low chuckle, smooth like whiskey, comes from him, and he grins. “Everyone always comes back for more, even when they say they won’t. So, fair warning.”

“Highly unlikely.”

The smile on his face grows. “Anything else you’d like to add?”

“What?”

“What other rules do you have for us?” he prompts, motioning with his hand. “You know, since you’re so hell-bent on making this a business transaction rather than a good time.”

“Oh, fuck off. Despite what you might think, I know how to have fun. I just think it’s better for us to have some…guidelines.”

“Like I said. Fun-sucker.”

I swear, every time I glare at the asshole, it only gives him more joy.

“Next rule,” I grind out, rather than letting him bait me into retaliation. “No one can know about this. Especially not Coach or the team.”

He nods, his grin erased in a heartbeat with a more serious topic on the table. “Yeah, I’m fine with that. I don’t know if this attraction I have for you is just a phase—like my big gay college experiment—or if I’m actually into dudes.” There’s a quick pause and he runs his hand through his hair before adding, “And until I know for sure, I’m not exactly jumping to do the whole coming out thing.”

Understanding washes through me. I get it, all too well, not wanting to say it out loud or let anyone know until you know it to be true yourself.

As much as I hate admitting it, it took me a few years to be comfortable enough to admit it out loud, even just to myself in the mirror. And even longer to tell anyone else, like my family or closest friends. Especially not knowing how their reactions would be. After all, I never gave off any vibes that I’m into guys. It took everyone by complete surprise, though they were supportive in the end.