I Married A Dragon (Prime Mating Agency)(62)

The heavy weight of Oshtara’s stare on me drew my attention away from her children. She was studying my features with a soft expression. In that instant, I knew beyond a doubt Caldri had deliberately lured her brothers away to leave me with her mother so that we could talk. I swallowed nervously, wondering what that talk would entail.

“When I first learned that my Cedros had finally found his Ejaya, my hearts rejoiced. But then dread filled me when I heard you were human,” she said matter-of-factly. “I didn’t know what that would mean for him. Would you understand your role? Would you be able and especially willing to fulfill it? Would you be able to adapt to our ways and our world? That worry gnawed at me until the moment the two of you came through that portal.”

“You’re no longer worried?” I asked, feeling irrationally nervous about her answer.

She smiled and shook her head. “No, I’m not. My Cedros is madly in love with you. I don’t know if you are in love with him, but I can see that you have genuine love for him. Cedros was always a good-spirited and playful youngling. But I’ve never seen him this happy. And it’s all because of you.”

My face heated with embarrassment. “I really don’t deserve that much merit. I just let him hug me, and he gets that happy buzz from the hormones,” I said with a nervous laugh.

“It’s more than that, and you know it,” Oshtara said factually. “The merit for all this is yours. Own your achievements, my daughter. There is no need to be humble with the truth. But I have to ask you something. Is there a chance you might consider my Cedros as your mate?”

I shifted uneasily in my chair and tucked my hair behind my ear as I chose my words carefully. “Anything is possible. Like you said, I love Cedros dearly. We’ve only met recently and are getting to know each other. But in time, I might consider it, yes.”

“But?” Oshtara insisted. “I can sense something is troubling you. Maybe I could alleviate some concerns for you? I know we’ve also just met, but you are a daughter to me now. I hope you can grow comfortable to discuss anything that troubles you with me, as you would if I’d given birth to you myself.”

I gave her a trembling smile, emotions overwhelming me again at this maternal attention she was granting me. “This world differs greatly from what I’m used to. I’ll certainly have many questions about it. But there is one topic that I believe you, better than anyone, can shed some light on for me.”

“Ask away, my daughter. I’ll gladly provide whatever insight I can,” she said with an encouraging smile.

“I worry about children, if Cedros and I ever were to become mates,” I confessed sheepishly.

Oshtara frowned slightly, a sliver of worry flashing through her light green eyes. “Why? You do not wish to have any?”

“Oh no! Not at all! I grew up an orphan. I always dreamt of a family of my own with many children running around, surrounded by the love of both their parents,” I said passionately. “But Cedros is a Shadow Lord. That means there is a good chance at least one of our children would be one as well. How do you handle letting your five-year-old child fend for himself in the void for months or even years? What if he’s scared, cold, or hungry? What if something bad happens, and he's screaming for his mom and dad, but there is no one around to save him? What if—?”

“Stop, Kaida. It is not like that. Yes, sending your offspring into the void for the Shadow Trail is always a monumental challenge for both them and the parents,” Oshtara said in a soft but firm voice, interrupting me. “When two weeks went by and my firstborn didn’t return, I knew. One of my hearts rejoiced while the other broke. I missed him terribly, his hugs, his laughter, his mischief, his scent… He was my first baby and had always been so affectionate. It simply was his destiny.”

“But how do you cope? How do you not go insane and go chasing after him to make sure he’s fine?” I insisted.

“As scary as it may seem to you, the Shadow Trail is extremely safe. No youngling has ever been lost or died during his journey. This trial is not a cultural choice that we impose on our young. It is a natural physiological and spiritual step in the growth of a Derakeen. We need to immerse ourselves in the void. It’s what cements our phasing abilities. The same way the caterpillar feels the irresistible need to form a chrysalis for its transformation, so do we Derakeens feel the call of the void.”

I nodded, some—but very little—tension draining from my shoulders upon hearing her words. “I understand what you are saying, and it is a major relief to know that no child has ever died from this. However, I still don’t understand how a parent, especially a mother, can endure that kind of separation.”

Oshtara smiled and caressed my cheek. “That’s because you are thinking like a human. Do your people not leave their parents’ nest at some point?”

“Sure, but not at five!” I exclaimed, slightly outraged. “They’re just babies!”

“Humans are just babies at five. Not Derakeens. By the time they are five, our younglings can stalk and hunt prey, fight and escape predators, fly at speeds exceeding two-hundred-and-fifty kilometers per hour, and phase shift to get out of a dangerous situation. They are not helpless.”

“Wow, okay. Our little ones definitely can’t do that,” I conceded, chastised.