House of Salt and Sorrows(98)

Which meant Sterland hadn’t made the bargain…

Or had she known I would jump to that conclusion and wouldn’t be able to kill him, thus protecting the dealmaker?

Or, worse, was she putting these ideas into my head now, overloading me until I snapped? My temples pounded, my mind cycling through too many possibilities. How was I ever to know which was right?

“Annaleigh, why don’t you give me the knife?” Papa said, approaching slowly, hands raised in supplication. “You’re upset, obviously. You’ve been through a lot these last few weeks. Let’s talk, and I’m sure we’ll come up with a solution.”

“No. Sterland has to die before the bargain can be completed. This is the only way to fix it. Tell them, Cassius.”

I glanced over my shoulder. I needed his reassurance. This was rapidly spinning out of my control. But when I looked to the doorway, he was gone.

A sound of confusion escaped me. I hurried out into the hallway, but he was nowhere to be found. “Cassius?” Crossing back into the room, I scanned it more thoroughly. “Where did he go?”

Camille frowned, confusion clouding her face. “Who?”





“Cassius.” I turned back to my sisters. “He’ll explain everything, Camille. I didn’t do anything to Verity, I promise you—”

“Who are you talking about, Annaleigh?” Camille’s voice was calm and measured, as if she were talking to a madwoman. The real glint of fear in her eyes gave me pause. She was looking at me as if I was a madwoman.

“Cassius…Cassius Corum. Captain Corum’s son.”

“Captain Corum is dead.”

“I know that. His son took his place at Churning. Why don’t you remember any of this?” Despite my best efforts, my voice rose in pitch as I spoke, verging dangerously on hysterics.

“It’s like Elizabeth all over again,” Papa murmured. His face was ashen. I’d never seen him look so old. He offered Sterland a look of spent resignation. “I’m so sorry, old friend. Would you allow us a moment with just Annaleigh?”

Sterland edged away from the chair, patting Papa on the back with remorseful condolence. “Of course, of course. Family affair and all that.” His eyes lingered on me, deep with sorrow. “If there’s any way I can be of assistance…”

Papa thanked him and waved him away.

“You’re just going to let him go?” I asked, watching him leave the room a free man. “Papa, he—”

“Sterland isn’t the issue here.” The look on his face said everything his words did not.

“I am?” I asked, aghast. “Me?”

“No one else is seeing people who don’t exist.”

My dagger clattered to the floor as the room swam in and out of focus. This was a mistake. It had to be. Cassius was real. I’d been with him. All night. He was the one who told me everything about Viscardi and the bargain. Kosamaras and her games.

Her games…

She’s the Harbinger of Madness, creating so many false visions and skewed realities that the poor soul takes his life just to end the torment.

With his words ringing in my ears, I sank to my knees, shivering uncontrollably. Had Kosamaras made me imagine Cassius? Was she powerful enough to create an entire person from thin air? We’d had so many conversations, shared so many kisses. I remembered the look in his eyes when he said he liked me best. I could still feel his hands on my body. That couldn’t be manufactured, could it? He was real. He had to be.

I remembered talking about him with my sisters. They’d seen him—I wasn’t the only one! But as quickly as my triumphant thought came, it was snatched away, like trying to hold on to the changing tides with your bare hands.

Rosalie and Ligeia had spoken with him. They were dead and couldn’t vouch for him or me.

“Honor! Mercy! You were with him at the tavern in Astrea. He bought you cider.” They stared blankly at me. “The day that Edgar…the day we got new slippers to replace the fairy shoes…”

Even as I said this, I spotted a twinkle of jade. Incomprehension flooded through me as I pushed aside my skirts, staring at my fairy shoes, whole and intact. They looked as new as the day we’d unwrapped them. I quickly covered them back up, wishing I’d never noticed them.

“Camille, you’ve seen him, I know you have. He sat right next to you at Churning! He was at the ball in Pelage….” I shook my head, trying to dislodge that thought. The balls weren’t real, and Cassius hadn’t been there.

The truth crashed through me, falling from above like an anchor settling on the seafloor.

Cassius hadn’t been at the ball in Pelage, even though I was so certain of his presence.

Kosamaras had made me see him there.

She’d made me see him everywhere.

Slowly, watching Papa for approval, Camille crossed the room and knelt beside me. She rubbed soothing circles across my back, the way you would comfort a frightened horse, crazed from a storm. “You mean the triplets’ ball? Annaleigh, no one named Cassius was there.”

“Not that ball. Stop saying my name like that.”

“Like what?”

I shoved her arm away from me. “Like I’ve gone mad. Like you’re trying to calm a mad person.”