Homicide and Halo-Halo (Tita Rosie's Kitchen Mystery #2)(43)

That’s right, I’d promised to go to one of her fitness classes. That wasn’t happening now. I managed a weak smile. “A rain check sounds good. Thanks, Sana. And thanks for sticking around.”

“Don’t mention it.” She returned the smile before leaving me with Detective Park and Bernadette.

“So what are you doing here?” I asked Bernadette. My mind was finally clearing, and more than the anger I felt toward her and her mother’s behavior the other night, I was also embarrassed. Of all the people to see me have a breakdown. Was this going to be fodder for our next argument? My recent panic attacks had all taken place when I was alone, so I didn’t have to deal with people fussing over me. Now I was completely exposed in front of the man who wanted to send me to a shrink and the woman who’d been looking to exploit my weaknesses all our lives.

Bernadette didn’t answer, just grabbed my wrist and looked at her watch. “Hm, your blood pressure is elevated, but you don’t seem to be at risk. Is this your first time having a panic attack?”

I snatched my wrist away. “I asked you what you were doing here.”

She put her hands on her hips. “I wanted to cheer on Joy, of course.”

“Don’t you have a job?”

Bernadette refused to meet my eyes. “They still don’t want me coming in to work. Thought I might as well make myself useful and be there for Joy.”

That’s right, Jae had mentioned that the other day. That job meant everything to her. Still, I refused to let myself be taken in by her when she hadn’t even apologized for the night before. “Hmm, that’s a shame. Good luck with the investigation.”

“Lila . . .” Bernadette rocked back and forth slightly, as if preparing to jump off a high dive. “What my mom said . . . she didn’t mean it. About Tita Cecilia. We loved your mom, you know that.”

I hefted my bag higher up on my shoulder and crossed my arms. “Is this supposed to be an apology? Because it kinda sounds like one, yet you’re missing a super important part. Two little words?”

Bernadette sighed and rolled her eyes, but said what I wanted to hear. “I’m sorry.”

“For?”

“Um, my mom talking bad about your mom?”

“You know that’s not the only thing you have to apologize for, right?”

She threw up her hands. “Look, Lila, this is hard for me. You know how dysfunctional our moms’ relationship was. You know I’m not the only one who had to deal with their mom’s unrealistic expectations. Can’t you cut me some slack here? I mean, your mom messed you up too, you know.”

I reached into my bag to pull out my keys. “You know what, forget it. If you can’t even apologize when you’re clearly in the wrong, that’s on you. I don’t have time for this.”

“Lila!” Bernadette called after me, but I ran out to the parking lot and she was smart enough to not come after me.

Detective Park had exited before me and was waiting in the lot, his car parked right next to mine. “Do you need me to give you a ride home?” he asked.

“I think I’m good. Just need a minute.” I took a few gulps from the water bottle he’d given me earlier and the angry buzzing of Bernadette’s words began to fade. “Feeling better already.”

“Do you want to talk about what happened?”

“What do you mean? I just told you what happened. And the Bernadette thing is family business, not yours.”

Detective Park nodded. “Understood. But I meant your reaction to the reporter, Lila. That’s a classic symptom of PTSD.”

“I’m fine.”

“Have you called Dr. Kang yet?” He paused. “Look, I don’t want to pry, but Rosie told me a bit about your mom and your connection to these pageants. I wouldn’t want this investigation to trigger—”

“I said I was fine, Detective! Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go lie down for a bit.”

He sighed, but let it go. “I’m going to follow you home to make sure you get there OK. I don’t want you blacking out along the way. And I wouldn’t put it past Mr. Philipps to be waiting for you at your house.”

There was no point in arguing, so we got into our cars and I took extra care to drive home just under the speed limit—any slower and that would’ve been suspicious. I guess he didn’t trust me to make it the ten steps it took from my driveway to the door, so he sat in his car and watched me even after I’d parked. I made a big show of unlocking my front door and opening it with a flourish.

“See, Detective? Made it here all on my own. You can go back to solving crimes, or whatever it is you do when you’re not hounding me.”

Detective Park kept his expression blank as he nodded at me through his open window. “Take care of yourself, Lila.”

“I always do, Detective.”





Chapter Fifteen





I’d fallen asleep shortly after getting home, cuddling Longganisa while listening to Their Greatest Hits by the Eagles on repeat. The Eagles were in the middle of their second rotation when a loud, insistent buzzing woke me up. Thinking it was my phone alarm, I slammed my hand on it, trying to dismiss the alarm, but it wouldn’t shut up. I grabbed my phone, the bright screen blinding me as I struggled to figure out what was going on without dropping it on my face.