Her Royal Highness (Royals #2)(26)

“Ah, you’ve got mates!” Gilly says happily, clapping his hands together. “Well, in that case . . .”

And with that, he throws a punch.

The guy staggers back, his drink crashing to the floor, and the other guys at his table all shoot to their feet while Seb and his friends grin.

Seb even throws me another wink. “Sorry about this, love,” he says, and then there is a full-on fight happening.

The dude has rallied from Gilly’s admittedly pretty weak punch, and he grabs Spiffy around the middle, pushing him into an empty table as the bartender squawks.

“Oh god,” Perry whimpers, while Sakshi starts pushing at me.

“Quick, we have to get out of here!” she cries. “Before someone gets their phone out!”

I feel like I just tipped straight into Crazytown, and I stare at Saks, baffled. “Someone should get their phone out,” I tell her, “and call the freaking cops.”

But Saks just keeps pushing at me. “No, they’re going to take pictures, you ninny!”

On the other side of the pub, Spiffy is trying to yank a set of decorative bagpipes off the wall while Seb may be the first man I’ve ever seen attempt to use a cardboard coaster as a weapon.

I turn to Sakshi, gaping. “That’s your major concern right now?”

“Quint!”

I twist in my seat to look at Flora on the other side of Saks, and she’s lifted her pint glass, grinning, her eyes nearly sparkling.

Then her arm goes back, empty pint glass cocked.

“Duck.”





Oh, look, another day, another mess from Prince Sebastian of Scotland. Honestly, why don’t they just keep him locked up in a tower room in one of their five billion castles? Isn’t that what these royal types do? Anyway, here are the blurry shots of Seb punching some poor pleb who probably made the mistake of lifting his eyes to the royal visage. Note Princess Flora over there on the right, throwing what looks like a pint glass. Maybe they should get adjoining tower rooms, only be taken out for special occasions. They can take Peregrine Fowler with them. He’s the ginger bloke in picture number three, cowering under the table. Second son of the Earl of WhoTheEffCares, Gregorstoun student, and wannabe Royal Wrecker, if you ask me. Pretty sure that’s the Duke of Alcott’s daughter with her hands over her face, but no idea who the other girl is.


(“Quelle Surprise,” from Off with Their Heads)





CHAPTER 14





The fact that we’re having the meeting in the chapel and not Dr. McKee’s office seems . . . less than great.

I haven’t been in Dr. McKee’s office on the ground floor, but the one time I passed it and the door was open, it looked . . . cozy. And the scent of strong tea had wafted out the door.

The chapel smells like snuffed candles and furniture polish, which, I’m learning, is much less soothing.

The fight at the pub hadn’t just been a local village scandal, but apparently made it into the papers as well. I haven’t bothered to look because the last thing I want to see is a blurry creeper shot of me cowering in the booth as punches and pint glasses were thrown. We’d made it back to the school okay, but the very next morning, Flora, Sakshi, Perry, and I had all had notices to meet Dr. McKee in the chapel.

Seb and his friends are long gone, of course, happily consequence-free, I bet.

Meanwhile, I’ve spent the entire morning trying not to throw up, visions of me being booted onto the next plane to Texas running through my head. How could I have been so stupid? I should’ve just stayed in my room.

Except, I remind myself, I did it for Saks. My folly was noble at least.

I turn to her now and whisper, “Guess the whole ‘marry Seb’ thing is out the window now, huh?”

To my surprise, Sakshi shakes her head. “No, but I realize now my plan will need some recalibrating.”

“Right,” I reply faintly before turning my attention back to Dr. McKee.

She’s standing in front of the altar, her hands clasped, her shoulders straight, and next to me on the pew, Flora sighs.

“This is so dramatic,” she says in a low voice. “So very like Mummy.”

And that’s when I realize this little meeting that I thought would just be with us and Dr. McKee is much bigger than I’d understood.

“Wait, ‘Mummy’?” I ask Flora, my eyes going wide. “As in your mother? As in the queen of this freaking country?”

Turning to me, Flora raises an eyebrow. “Why do you think we’re in here?” she asks. “This is the only part of the school that can be accessed without going through the rest. My mother hardly wants to advertise her presence.”

Saks is sitting on the other side of me, and now she leans all the way across me to grab Flora’s shoulder. “We’re having a meeting with Her Majesty?”

Shrugging off her touch, Flora rolls her eyes. “She’ll be here in a Mum capacity, not a royal one.”

Sakshi’s eyes are huge, and she looks down at her lap. “This isn’t even my best uniform.”

“All our uniforms are the same,” Perry says, but Sakshi shakes her head.

“No, Perry, I have one for regular days and one that I had tailored to fit better. This isn’t the tailored one, Perry. This isn’t the tailored one!”