Hellbent (Orphan X #3)(79)

It was dusk by the time Evan had completed his second drive-by and parked the minivan several blocks away. He and Joey moved unnoticed up the sidewalk and then the corridor. Evan punched in the code to free the keys. He handed one to Joey, turning the other in the lock, and they stepped into a surprisingly clean small room with two freshly made twin beds.

He tossed his stuff onto the mattress closer to the door as Joey plugged in her laptop and then checked her phone for the fiftieth time for updates. She grabbed a change of clothes from her bag and went to shower as Evan worked out—push-ups, sit-ups, dips with his heels on the windowsill and his hands ledging the seat of the solitary chair. Joey came out, sweeping her hair up into a towel, and he turnstiled past her in the tight space.

When he finished showering and emerged from the bathroom, she was at the laptop again, chewing her lip. He checked his RoamZone to see if Xavier had called. He hadn’t. Evan used the wall to stretch out the tendons of his right shoulder. Almost back to full range of motion.

It occurred to him that neither he nor Joey had uttered a word in the preceding forty-five minutes and yet the silence had been comfortable. Pleasant, even.

It reminded him of when he was a kid, walking around the farmhouse with Jack, wiping the counters, taking turns on the pull-up bar by the side of the house, filling Strider’s water bowl. At times Jack and he cooked, ate, and cleared an entire meal without a word passing between them.

They were so in sync that they didn’t need to speak.

Joey looked over from the bluish screen, saw Evan watching her. That dimple floated in her wide cheek.

She said, “What are you thinking about?”

“Nothing,” he said.

They blinked at each other for a moment.

“What are you doing over there?” he asked.

“Catching up on the latest and greatest. There’s a disposable, disappearing chat room for black-hat hackers.”

“I won’t ask if it’s secure.”

“No,” she agreed. “That would be condescending.”

“Do you want to try meditating again?”

She gave a one-shouldered shrug. “I seem to suck at it.”

“Meditating?”

“Being out here.” She made a halfhearted gesture at the laptop. “Easier to be online. I feel real in there.”

“But it’s not,” he said. “Real.”

“What is?”

“Trauma.”

Her lips tensed until they went pale. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I don’t ever have to know what happened to you in those foster homes,” he said. “But you’ve got it inside you. It’s holding on in your body.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because it’s waiting when you close your eyes and get quiet.”

“Bullshit. I just don’t like sitting still.”

He went over to his bed and sat with his back to the headboard. He stayed very still.

“Fine,” she said. “Fine.”

She logged out, bounced from chair to bed. Crossed her legs.

“Get relaxed but not too relaxed,” he said. “Become aware of any tightness or tingling. Rest your tongue on the roof of your mouth, your hands on your knees. Focus on the breath moving through you. Follow it and see where it takes you.”

He straightened his spine, pulled his shoulders back into alignment, made a two-millimeter adjustment to the column of his neck. Slowly the laughter and music from outside faded. He became acutely aware of the pressure of the mattress beneath him, a twinge in his right shoulder, the scent of laundry detergent. He started to constrict his focus, the outside world irising shut. But he sensed an unease inside the room.

Joey, rocking from side to side. She rolled her neck.

“Try not to squirm,” he said.

“I’m not squirming.”

“Just keep coming back to your breath. And to sitting still.”

She remained motionless, but her agitation grew, a physical force clouding the air between them.

She exhaled sharply and flopped back. She stared at the ceiling. When she blinked, tears streamed down her temples. She was breathing hard.

Then she got up violently, the mattress springs whining, her bare feet hitting the floor with a thud. She rushed out, slamming the door behind her.

Evan stared at the door. She’d caught him off guard, perhaps even more than when she’d broken his nose.

He uncrossed his legs, stood up, hesitated.

She wanted to be alone. Should he respect that? In this neighborhood?

He reminded himself that she could take care of herself just fine.

Somewhere outside, a car horn blared.

He noted the concern swelling in his chest with each breath. An odd sensation. She was fine.

But he wasn’t.

Already he was walking to the door and then moving swiftly through the outside corridor. The other apartment doors were closed now, the denizens busy inside from the sound of it. He swept around the other arm of the complex—no sign of Joey. He circled back around the pool, the same young men telling the same stories, smoking different blunts, not noticing him or anything else. His chest tightened even more as he cut between the cars in the parking lot.

Still no Joey.

He jogged up the block. A pimped-out Camaro drove past, windows down, rap booming from the radio. Eminem was cleaning out his closet and doing a damn fine job of it.