Heart of the Devil (The Forge Trilogy #3)(35)

“I won, and we had a deal. You don’t need to understand any more than that.”

He exhales a cloud of smoke, and the air purifiers suck it up toward the ceiling instead of it billowing around my face.

“Do you love him?”

The question hits me hard. Probably harder than it should because this man is a stranger, but he shouldn’t be. I share half my DNA with him. Even so, I’m not sure I’m ready to bare my soul to him.

“Does it matter?”

He taps the edge of the cigar on a crystal ashtray before meeting my gaze. “Yes. I think it does.”

“Did you love my mother?” I fire back, not wanting to be the only one off-balance here.

“Absolutely.”

“Then why did you have a mistress?” The question has been driving me crazy since I learned Nina kidnapped me as a child for revenge.

My father’s chin dips, and he focuses on the Aubusson rug on the floor. “To my everlasting regret, I am not a man without faults. It was expected. Encouraged. Almost like a status symbol.”

My lips curl in disgust. “Save me from cultures where cheating is fashionable.”

“It is hard to explain, Illyana—Indy.”

At the sound of my birth name, another question pops into my head. “Did you know she had another daughter? Your mistress?”

“No. When we found her, she gave nothing for information. Just said you were dead. Over and over.”

The fact that Nina wouldn’t admit I was alive doesn’t make sense.

“Why would she lie if she could’ve saved her life by telling the truth? If you knew her, you’d know that she’d sell out anyone to save her own ass.” Bitterness colors my tone, and my father’s expression hardens as though he’s reliving a memory I don’t want to see.

“Nina knew she would die either way. What she did was unforgivable. She held on to her story until the end because she wanted to spite me, even in death.”

“You have terrible taste in mistresses, just FYI.” I believe his explanation. I’ve never known a person more selfish than the woman I thought was my mother. It’s almost a relief to find out she’s not. Still, I have to find a way to tell Summer. She’s going to be devastated.

“Was she . . . unkind to you? Did she . . . hurt you?” he asks, and his hesitant tone tells me that he really cares about the answer and is praying that it’s not a bad one.

“Nina was indifferent. She didn’t beat me or slap me around. She just . . . forced me to grow up really quick. If I wanted to eat, I had to earn it. And then when Summer came along, I had a purpose in life—protect Summer at all costs. There’s nothing I wouldn’t have done for my sister.”

Federov’s blue gaze searches my face, and I can only imagine the regret he feels. I don’t want to have regrets like that. I don’t know how he’s survived without them eating away at him every moment of the day. Then again, maybe they have.

“You are a strong woman. I can see why Forge could not resist falling in love with you.”

He’s the second man to tell me Forge was in love with me, and it packs even more punch this time. I desperately want it to be the truth.

“How . . .” My voice shakes as I try to speak, and I clear my throat to steady it. “How do you know he was falling in love with me?”

My father’s hand scoops up his vodka. “Forge did not deny it. And then he let you go.”

“But why? Why would he let me go? It doesn’t make sense. We were fine when we returned to Spain, and then . . . the next day, it was like speaking to a different man. Forge, not Jericho.”

My father’s jaw shifts at the ragged edge of my tone. “Forge was not a good man, India. He married you because of me. Simply to gain leverage over our deal. Then he put you in more danger because of his feud with de Vere. He left you vulnerable when that danger came to him. The morning after you left Prague, I told him if he had any honor, he would let you go.”

Honor? Jericho shattered my heart because of honor? The timing of the conversation fits. Everything was great . . . until my father interfered. My pulse thrums in my throat. I will never understand men. Ever.

“You think he showed honor by letting me go—by doing the right thing. And that makes you believe he loved me?”

My father exhales a cloud of smoke over his right shoulder. “Does it matter? What’s done is done.”

My fingers sink into the leather arms of my club chair. “It matters because I didn’t get a goddamned say. Did you ever stop to think that I might want him, whether you thought he had honor or not? Did it ever occur to you that I might be in love with him?”

A shadow passes over my father’s face. “I do not want to see you upset. That was not my goal. But . . . there are things you still don’t understand.”

“What?”

He puffs on the cigar before he speaks. “I told Forge that giving you up forever was the only way I would agree to sign his deal with Karas and Riscoff.”

My entire body tenses. “When? What did he say?”

“I cannot tell you. I swore to him I would not.”





32





Forge





The report comes in, and I grin for the first time in weeks.