Gypsy Moon (All The Pretty Monsters #4)(35)

“How is it that my loyalty to her isn’t allowed to be broken or handed to you? Do you know how often they strayed?” he asks me almost angrily, eyes intent as he remains between my legs and caging me in.

I open my mouth to speak, but he continues on, eyes steady and intent.

“Damien was so unfaithful that she had to curse him to keep his dick out of other women,” he grinds out. “Vance was so cold and indifferent that she chased him the hardest, constantly working around his tightly crafted walls, even as he had his flings and his spare women.”

Again, I try to speak, but Arion is on a mission.

“Emit was with any wolf who wanted him the second he got his immortality. He’s lucky he wasn’t also cursed,” Arion prattles on, his tone indignant. “I did nothing, Violet. I was the rock. The most dependable and loyal. Yet you refuse to accept me, almost as though you’re punishing me for being the kind of fellow who doesn’t want just any woman.”

My hand slides across his smooth, firm jaw, shaking my head slowly, as I stare up at him.

“All that’s a little complicated,” I explain. “And it sounds insane,” I add with a firm nod. “Instead of cursing Damien and making all their lives hell, she should have just let them go when they wanted to be let go.”

His hand slams on the side of the stone wall so fast and so loudly that I jump and flinch, and he takes a quick step back.

“No, the problem is that you still fear me,” he says, blurring to be across the room in an instant, putting a lot of space between us, as I shove my shirt back down to cover myself. “And you won’t spend any time with me to get over that fear.”

“Arion, you’re still excusing all Idun did to them—the end justifies the means. Whether you see it or not, you’re still loyal to her, because in the end, there was only pain—nothing was justified. At least not to the three she hurt the worst.”

I hop off the ledge, and he simply stares at me with an indecipherable look on his face.

“If I’m willing to move on, then clearly I’m over her antics, Violet,” he says very calmly.

“I still feel like I’m the pin you’re sticking into your own private issues with Idun. I don’t want to be the pin, Arion. I don’t want to be a staple. I don’t want to be tape, or glue, or stitches, or any other form of a metaphorical temporary fix. I don’t even know what I’m doing right now, and it’s—”

Someone knocks on the door, and Arion grabs a stack of pencils from a nearby holder.

“I strongly urge you to find another time,” he answers, with frayed patience, to whoever it is.

“Actually, I should go,” I say as I clear my throat, and wipe my eyes that have started filling up with pointless tears.

Mom’s lie is slowly processing in my head as each and every dam I’ve built starts to crack.

Arion cracks his neck to one side, and then the other—an annoyed glint in his eyes—before giving me a tight smile.

“Since it’s becoming increasingly apparent you’re never going to come to me on your own, I’ll at least leave your present at the door. It shouldn’t go to waste, and I plan to get you something different on your next birthday,” he states randomly, before abruptly walking out, never even glancing back at me.

His footsteps quickly turn into a whisper of wind that leaves that telling chill racing up my spine.

“You’re an idiot,” Shera says as she walks in.

“So are you for knocking,” I point out, my expressionless game face slipping back into place, as she gives me a look that makes me feel stupid.

“Like I’d be that idiotic. It was Isiah. He’s rather anti-you, since you’re being blamed by him and Emily for my break up,” she states with a tight, humorless smile.

Why is there music playing so loud?

“Awesome,” I state, tossing my thumb up.

She gives me a slow shake of her head. “You don’t realize how protected you are by Arion, but that protection stems as far as his interest in you, Violet. I’m putting him in a bit of jam with this breakup, so I’d appreciate it if you don’t go and fuck things up for me. M’kay?” she asks, a very serious but calm expression on her face.

“Is this you being that pretend badass?” I ask her, gesturing toward her stance.

She gives me a bit of a glare. “I’m not a pretend badass. The flair is just dramatic. You really misunderstood that entire conversation,” she says like I’ve started to exhaust her now.

“Which conversation? The real one when you thought we were going to die—”

“You can come back to life the way they do, can’t you?” she butts in, her eyes flicking over me. “Arion was far too calm that day.”

“That’s a normal thing to suspect so easily?” I ask in deflection.

“Aside from the alphas, it’s impossible, but I determine what is or isn’t possible based on the surrounding circumstances. All the things they’ve been alluding to today…”

She lets her words trail off, and oddly, she fidgets with her hands.

“Just give me something, because I’ve told you far too much and there should be more balance in our budding friendship,” she adds in closing, determined eyes sweeping back up to meet mine.