Glitch (Next Level #1)(30)

“Never call yourself stupid again, understand?”

I don’t react.

“Ara.” He dips his face to mine and holds my stare. “Never call yourself that again.”

I nod because I’m not sure I can speak. My mind is swarming with a million thoughts at once, and all of them are awful.

You’re lucky you found someone who’s willing to date you, Ara.

You’re so pathetic.

You call this art? A pig would be a better model than you. Look at yourself. You’re lucky I can see past your flaws. Who did you paint those nudes for, Ara? Your gaming buddies?

Why can’t you keep your hands off yourself? You’re a filthy fucking whore. A pig whore. You’re disgusting. It’s a good thing I love you because no one else will.

I see Glitch’s mouth move, but I’m not able to connect the words or process them because all I hear are the mean, awful things my exes have said about me. And Jason’s horrible voice makes my blood freeze when I remember him saying, “You only ever go online to be with those losers because you’re too stupid for real conversation. Those paint fumes go to your head, Ara? Be glad I have a real job so we can still go out and afford dinner when all you do is play with your paint all day. Maybe you should suck my dick to show how you appreciate having a real man.”

Suddenly, Glitch is smashing his mouth to mine. His smell, his taste, his touch, his control over me vanquishes every bad thought from my brain. Burns them with the heat of his desire and I’m left floating in the chair, breathless.

He eases back, worry forcing his brows to dig down. “What just happened?”

I don’t want to explain it. I don’t want to say. But I promised myself to not hold back with Glitch, and so far, so good. “I have a lot of insecurity.”

He doesn’t react. At. All.

“I’ve dated a lot of shitbags”

Still no reaction.

“I sometimes can’t keep their nasty words out of my head. It makes me panic or freeze, and I’m trying to not let them in because I don’t want to ruin what we have going, so I just freaked out a little bit and I swear I’ll do better. I just need a minute to reconfigure.”

I just need a minute to reconfigure? What the fuck am I, a computer program? Oh my God, I want to crawl under a rock now.

Glitch has yet to move.

“Say something,” I whisper.

His jaw clenches. The tendons in his neck become more defined. He stares and stares and stares at me. His voice trembles when he asks, “Which one?”

“W-which one what?”

“Which sorry ass, piece of shit do you want me to kill first?”

I let out a small, exasperated laugh.

“I’m not joking, Ara.” He blindly reaches behind him and snatches a pad of paper and a pen and slams them on the desk. “Names, addresses, places of business.”

“Glitch.”

“Ara.”

“Glitch!” I smack my hand on the notepad. “It’s not funny!”

“And I’m not laughing.” He keeps his tone calm, but I can see in his eyes he’s close to boiling over. “You just fritzed out because you’re haunted by the hateful words of men who didn’t deserve you, and you expect me to not address it?”

I’m not sure what to say. “You can’t just go after them.”

“The hell I can’t.” He spins my chair and plants his hands on the armrests. “I’m so fucking sorry. I’m sorry I took so long to get to you. I’m sorry you had to ever be around an asshole who couldn’t appreciate what he had. I’m sorry you don’t see your beauty like I do, or that you can’t grasp how truly insanely amazing you are.” He jerks the chair, making my heart leap in surprise. “I’ll spend all day, every day, telling you the truth. I’ll growl them in your ear, carve them into your dreams. You’re the most beautiful creature I’ve ever met. You’re funny and talented and built like a goddamn wet dream.”

I start to cry again.

Glitch cups my face and wipes away my tears. “You’re witty and sweet and silly.” He kisses me tenderly. “You drive me wild with your laugh, did you know that? I’m gonna have hearing damage from how loud I turn up the volume whenever we play online. I can’t get enough of your laugh. Your voice.” He kisses me some more. “The way you hand Carson and Trey their own asses.” He kisses down my neck. “The way you make me hard when all you do is type ‘Hi’ to me on Discord.”

He lifts the hem of my shirt and pulls it off me. “I dream about you every night. Have for over a year.” Glitch lifts me off the chair and I end up bracing my hands against his desk while he pulls my shorts down. “I’ve jacked off to the image of you every day for months.”

My nipples harden instantly.

“Do you like knowing that, Kitty?”

I do. I really, really fucking do.

“Answer me.”

“Y-yes.”

“I imagined what you’d look like. I tried to find you online and couldn’t.”

I swallow through the tightness in my throat. “And… now that you’ve seen me?”

Glitch wraps my pink hair around his fist and bends my head back a little. “My imagination did not do you justice, Ara. Not by a fucking longshot.”