Getting Played (Getting Some, #2)(73)

When it’s time to push, I opt for the bed, chin down and legs up, my hands hooked behind my knees—grunting and panting—with my doula on one side, my OB down below ready to catch, and Dean half on the bed with me, holding me up as pain claws through me. His whispered words keep me calm and focused and his arms, his scent, make me feel safe and invincible.

At the end of another contraction, I collapse against Dean, gasping for breath. He brushes my hair back from my face and I beg him without asking for a thing.

“I’m so tired, Dean. I’ve never been this tired.”

“One more push, Lainey,” my OB says cheerfully. “Just one more. You can do it.”

And I fucking hate her. She can take her just one more and shove it up her ass.

“Dean . . .” I whimper.

I hear the song “Almost Paradise” playing from his phone as Dean presses his forehead against my temple, whispering, “You’re doing so good, Lainey. You’re almost there, you’re so close.”

I shake my head, because I don’t know if I can do this.

He kisses my damp cheek, and his warm, rough voice brushes my ear. “I’m right here with you, we’ll do it together. I love you. Lainey. I love you so much.”

The beautiful surprise of his words and the joy they bring, gives me the last lift I need to keep going. To nod my head for him and let him hold me up.

So when those tendrils of pressure start again in my lower back, weaving their way around, squeezing and squeezing and tightening until it feels like I’ll tear in two—I hold tight to Dean’s hand and lean against him and breathe deep.

And then I push with everything I have . . . one more time. And that’s how it happens, that’s when our beautiful baby comes into the world.



~




Dean





When I walk out to the waiting room there are more people than I expect, considering it’s still a few minutes before 7 am. Grams is here and Jason. Lainey’s parents and all four of her sisters, two brothers-in-law and one nephew. I didn’t grow up with a big family, but I guess I should get used to it—because that’s what I’ve got now.

I tell Lainey’s Mom and Dad, “She’s good—Lainey and the baby are both healthy.”

Grams shuffles over and gives me a big hug. “I’m so happy for you, Deany.”

I kiss her cheek. “Thanks, Grams.”

And then it’s Jason I walk up to—because he’s the one I want to tell first. I put my hand on his shoulder.

“You want to meet your little sister?”

His smile builds until it reaches all the way to his eyes.

“It’s a girl?”

“It’s a girl.” I nod.

He peers closer at my face. “Dude, were you crying?”

“Holy shit—so much crying. Wait until you see her—she’s so cute—you’ll cry too.”

Jay laughs loud and easy—then he comes in for an elated, back-pounding hug.

“What’s her name?” Judith asks.

“Ava.” And I laugh for no fucking reason at all. “Ava Burrows Walker.”



~



After Ava gets passed around from family member to family member, like an adorable hot potato, everyone eventually heads home, and that night at the hospital it’s just me and Lainey and the baby in our room. When Lainey is done nursing, I carry Ava over to the bassinet and change her diaper. Now that she’s warm and dry and her belly is full, her dark round eyes inch closed and her tiny, adorable mouth opens in a wide, precious yawn.

I hold her close against my bare chest, skin to skin, because all the books say it’s comforting for babies. Then I rock her and tap her diapered ass gently, singing the same song I’m drumming against her diaper—“Africa” by Toto.

Lainey’s awake in the bed and I feel her eyes on me, watching me hold our daughter. Our daughter. How wild is that?

“I love you too, you know,” she says softly.

Her gaze is shiny and so damn sweet—brimming with emotion, and filled with our future.

“I mean, how can I not love a hot shirtless guy singing the best song ever recorded to a newborn?” She gives a little laugh, then she goes on. “I’ve loved you for a while, Dean. You were right—I was scared. But I’m good now.”

I slip onto the bed, holding Ava in the crook of one arm and wrapping the other around Lainey, tugging her close. That surging feeling of contentment and joy comes back again, tightening in my chest, and I’m pretty sure this is as good as it gets. That everything I didn’t know I always wanted, is right here in this moment, in my arms.

I kiss Lainey long and sweet—because she’s beautiful and perfect and all fucking mine.

“I love you, Lainey. I think it started that first night. When I woke up and realized I’d let you get away and I was . . . wrecked. Then when I found you again—and that feeling, the love, it was still there—and it grew every day.” I kiss her again, promising. “It’s going to keep growing, Lainey.”

“Yeah.” Her pink, pretty lips slide into a smile and she rests her head on my shoulder. Together we gaze down at the miracle we made and we plan the life we’ll make from this day on.