Fallen Too Far (Too Far, #1)(49)

This wasn’t Blaire’s fault. Why couldn’t Nan see that? This was like talking in circles. I reached out and pulled her into my arms. The little girl I had taken care of my entire life was looking at me through swollen eyes. I was all she had. “I’m sorry for yelling at you,” I told her, and she sobbed harder against my chest.

“I just . . . just . . . don’t understand,” she said.

Telling Nan that I was in love with Blaire wasn’t the answer to this. For starters, I hadn’t told Blaire I loved her, and I needed to tell her first. Second, Nan would lose her shit if I told her that. She could go from pitiful, sobbing mess to wild, insane tornado in a second. I had witnessed that more than once. “It isn’t about the sex. I’ve tried to tell you that Blaire isn’t to blame. I’ve tried explaining to you how she’s been wronged here, too. You aren’t the only victim. You shouldn’t hate someone who has suffered the way you have. I don’t understand why you can’t see that, Nan. I love you. I will always love you. You know that. But I can’t choose you over her. Not this time. This time, you’re asking for too much. I won’t give her up.”

Nan stilled in my arms. I wanted to hope that she was listening to me, that I was getting through to her, but I knew my sister. That would be too damn easy. It would take something much bigger to get her to give up a hatred she had held on to most of her life. “Why can’t you give her money and send her away?” Nan asked quietly as she leaned back from my embrace and crossed her arms over her chest defensively.

“Because I can’t let her go. She . . . she makes me happy, Nan.” I admitted that much to her.

Nan’s eyes flashed the anger I knew would ignite if she thought for a minute that I felt more for Blaire than I did for her. As f*cked up as that was, Nan expected to be my number one her entire life. She never considered what would happen if I fell in love one day. She was so desperate to be someone’s number one that she was determined to force it on me. “Because she’s a good f*ck?” she said sourly.

I closed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath. Keeping my calm was important. Losing it with Nan again wouldn’t help anything. When I opened my eyes, I leveled my gaze on my sister. “Nan. Don’t do that again. Blaire is not a f*ck for me. Get that through your head. She isn’t controlling me with sex. She’s more than that.”

Nan stiffened and turned her head to glare at the open door to Blaire’s room. “You don’t even know her. You just met her. Yet you want to choose her over me,” she spat.

“I do know her. I’ve been sharing a home with her for weeks now. I’ve been unable to keep my eyes off her. I’ve watched her. I’ve talked to her. I know her. She’s . . . God, Nan, she’s what makes me happy. Can’t you accept that? Let this thing with her go!”

Nan didn’t look at me or respond. The fight was done for now, but I knew I hadn’t won. She wasn’t over this.

We stood in silence for a few moments, and I waited for her to say something. Whatever she was deciding needed to be dealt with carefully. Nan held the power to ruin things for me. She could tell Blaire everything, and I’d lose. I couldn’t lose Blaire.

“I want to have friends over here tonight,” she said, swinging her gaze back to me.

Fine. She was going to force one of her parties on me. Typical Nan. She needed to know that I would still give in to her on some level. “OK,” I replied without argument. I would take Blaire up to my room, and we would be away from the crowd and noise.

Nan nodded, then turned and walked away. That was it. For now.





CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR


I wasn’t in the mood for this, but I’d told Nan she could have her party. I should have expected she’d overdo it without me giving her any guidelines. I wasn’t drinking tonight. I intended to spend my night with Blaire. The guys may have been informed of the fact that Blaire was off-limits, but the females hadn’t accepted that I wasn’t available. I shook my head at another of Nan’s friends who was offering to give me a blow job right in front of everyone.

Grant’s eyes met mine over the crowd. He was kicked back on the sofa, with a girl I had said no to earlier half-sitting in his lap. He rolled his eyes and took a swig of his beer. I had asked him to come and monitor things tonight. I didn’t want interruptions. He had agreed, as long as he could stay in his usual room if one of the females piqued his interest.

I didn’t care what he did, as long as no one bothered Blaire and me. I nodded my head in the direction of the girl I had just sent away. If he wanted easy, adventurous sex, I was sure that one was a good choice.

He raised his eyebrows in interest and watched her saunter into the living room. I was going to head upstairs and wait for Blaire in her room. She shouldn’t be too much longer now.

“You going up?” Nan asked.

I nodded. “Yeah. Grant’s here if you need him.”

“What about her? Is she gonna stay up there, too?” Nan asked, trying to look like she didn’t care what Blaire did.

“Blaire will be with me. Good night, Nan. Enjoy your party” She spun on her heels and stalked toward the kitchen.

I turned to look back at Grant, and he just shook his head.

He knew Nan was giving me shit about Blaire. I could tell he wasn’t on board with the not-telling-Blaire idea. He thought I should tell her now before it went too far.