Fallen Too Far (Too Far, #1)(20)
“Why was she here? Did you double-book?” Bailey asked in a sharp tone. I’d upset her. But I couldn’t keep touching her while thinking about Blaire seeing us. I hated the idea of Blaire seeing us.
“No. Let’s go,” I said. I didn’t owe her an explanation about Blaire.
“I don’t care. I know this is a one-night thing. I’m aware of how Rush Finlay works. I want that one night, Rush,” Bailey said, walking up to me and pulling on my shirt. “I need to be f*cked hard. Wherever and however you want it.”
Great. Now I had her worked up, and it was going to be even harder to get rid of her. “Listen, that girl . . .” I paused. What was I gonna say? I was using Bailey to get that girl out of my head. Now all I could do was think about her. “She—she’s special. I need to check on her and get her back here. She’s staying here, and what she saw . . . she didn’t deserve to see that.”
Bailey took a step back. Her heels clicked against the marble floor. “Are you in a relationship?” she asked, incredulously.
I shook my head. “No. I’m not in anything with anyone. But she’s . . .” I stopped. Fuck this. I didn’t have time for this. “I need to take you home now and find her, or I need to call someone to come get you. I don’t have time for this.”
Bailey spun on her heels and headed for the door. “Fine, Finlay But don’t ever call me again. This was it. Your one chance. It’s over.”
Best news I’d heard all damn day.
I took Bailey home and then drove through town, with no sign of Blaire. I hurried back to the house, hoping she’d be there. It was almost midnight, and I was about ready to call the f*cking police. She could be hurt somewhere, or someone could have her, or . . . no. I was letting my imagination get ahead of me. She was upset. I had upset her. My stomach knotted up. She had to understand that we couldn’t do this. That kiss was it. No more. I wasn’t ever going to let there be more for us.
Her truck was still gone when I parked in the garage and headed inside. I would wait for her for fifteen minutes, but then I was calling for backup. I would have a search party looking for her within ten minutes of my call. It was too dangerous for her to run off late like this. Even in Rosemary Beach.
Headlights filled the driveway, and I let out the breath I was holding. She was home. I waited until she was out of the truck and at the door before I opened it. I wasn’t giving her a chance to run from me.
She stood there in front of me then glanced around at my feet as if she were expecting to find something.
“Where have you been?” I asked, trying not to sound as frustrated as I was.
“What does it matter?” she asked. She wasn’t angry. She looked confused.
I closed the little bit of space between us. “Because I was worried,” I said honestly. She needed to know. She’d scared me.
“I find that real hard to believe. You were too busy with your company for the night to notice much of anything.” The distaste in her voice was obvious.
“You came in earlier than I expected. I didn’t mean for you to witness that,” I said, knowing it sounded bad as I said it. But I didn’t have an excuse. Even if I wished I did.
She shifted her feet and let out a sigh. “I came home the same time I do every night. I think you wanted me to see you. Why, I’m not sure. I’m not harboring feelings for you, Rush. I just need a place to stay for a few more days. I’ll be moving out of your house and your life real soon.”
Damn her. She was going to make me feel. I couldn’t f*cking feel. Not with her. Closing my eyes, I muttered a curse and tried to calm myself down. “There are things about me you don’t know. I’m not one of those guys you can wrap around your finger. I have baggage. Lots of it. Too much for someone like you. I expected someone so different, considering I’ve met your father. But you’re nothing like him. You’re everything a guy like me should stay away from. Because I’m not right for you.”
She laughed. She f*cking laughed. I was being honest with her, and she was laughing at me. “Really? That’s the best you’ve got? I never asked you for anything more than a room. I don’t expect you to want me. I never did. I am aware that you and I are on two different playing fields. Your league is one I will never measure up to. I don’t have the right bloodlines. I wear cheap red dresses, and I have a fond connection to a pair of silver heels because my mother wore them on her wedding day. I don’t need designer things. And you are designer, Rush.”
That was it. She had pushed me too damn far. I grabbed her hand and pulled her inside my house and backed her up against the wall. Caging her body in with mine felt good. It made my body hum with excitement that it didn’t need to be feeling. “I’m not designer. Get that through your head. I can’t touch you. I want to so damn bad it hurts like a motherf*cker, but I can’t. I won’t mess you up. You’re . . . you’re perfect and untouched. And in the end, you would never forgive me.” There, let her laugh at me now. The soft O of her lips only had me craving her taste again.
“What if I want you to touch me? Maybe I’m not so untouched. Maybe I’m already tainted.”
I wanted to laugh this time. Did she not know that I was aware of what kind of girl she was? I caressed her face, needing to touch her somewhere. “I’ve been with a lot of girls, Blaire. Trust me, I’ve never met one as f*cking perfect as you. The innocence in your eyes screams at me. I want to peel every inch of your clothing off and bury myself inside you, but I can’t. You saw me tonight. I’m a screwed-up, sick bastard. I can’t touch you.”