Envy(64)

“ ‘But eventually his dejection turned to outrage. He articulated the fiery internal argument he’d been having with himself, the argument that justified his anger toward Todd. “Fuck his apology!” He closed his hand into a tight fist. “He can’t undo the damage he’s done that easily.”

“ ‘When he finished venting about Todd, he cursed the pompous professor for being such an unrelenting bastard, at the same time admitting to his fear of never reestablishing a rapport with Hadley and thereby guaranteeing a dismal grade on his capstone.

“ ‘The words finally ebbed, then stopped altogether. Roark fell silent again and hunkered down into his jacket, not for the warmth it provided but from shame for sounding like such a goddamn crybaby.’ ”

Again, Parker raised his head and looked at Maris. “Well? Should I trash it or continue?”

“Continue. Please.”

“I’ll pick up with Leslie’s response.”

Returning to the manuscript, he read, “ ‘She waited until the smoke of his wrath had cleared, when it became noticeable that the cold from outside was seeping into the car. Her breath formed plumes of vapor between them. She spoke quietly, as one would to a temperamental animal who was momentarily docile. “What happened today is a good thing, Roark.”

“ ‘He snorted, looked over at her. “Good? How in God’s name is it good? Not that I believe in God.”

“ ‘He knew she wouldn’t like the atheistic remark. She was a devout believer who took offense at jokes made over anything religious. Ordinarily she admonished him for making them and asked him to kindly keep his irreverent comments to himself. This time, she elected to overlook it.

“ ‘ “The reason you’re taking this so hard is because your writing means so much to you.”

“ ‘It was a good point. He wanted to hear more. “And because it means so much to you, you’ll succeed. If you were able to shrug off the misunderstanding with Professor Hadley or laugh about it, then I would advise you to rethink your choice of career. You could dismiss this incident only if you had no passion for writing.

“ ‘ “What happened illustrates the depth of your passion. Your despondency over this… what really amounts to a hiccup in the grand scheme of things… demonstrates the level of your desire to write and write well. It hit you where it hurts most, which affirms that you’re doing what you were born to do.” She smiled. “I didn’t need it affirmed. But perhaps you did. And if you did, then this experience was worth all the anxiety it’s caused.”

“ ‘She reached for his hand and pressed it between hers. “Think about it, Roark, and you’ll realize that I’m right.” ’ ”

When Parker paused, Maris said, “She’s a very intuitive young woman.”

“You think?”

She nodded. Noticing the sheets still lying in his lap, she asked, “How does Parker respond?”

“The way most men respond to any emotionally charged situation.”

“Which is?”

“Well, depending on if we’re stimulated to feel bad or good, we either want to strike something or f*ck something.”





Chapter 14


Maris cleared her throat. “I don’t suppose Roark feels like striking something.”

“Wasn’t it you who suggested that I enhance their relationship?”

“It was.”

“Okay, then. They kiss, and it gets predictably slippery. Roark opens her coat, cuddles up to her chest. She gives him access to some skin. ‘Velvety, warm, fragrant woman skin,’ it says here. I’ll work on that.” He made a notation.

“He caresses her breasts. For the first time since they began dating, he uses his mouth. He kisses her nipples, teaching her something about arousal and the pleasurable possibilities that are available to a man and woman who are willing to explore them.”

Maris’s heart bumped inside her chest.

“Her scent. Her breath. The texture of her against his tongue. Combined with the day’s frustration. The foreplay just isn’t hacking it. The guy’s dying here. So he guides Leslie’s hand inside his jeans and, to put it delicately, she gives him a hand job.”

“That’s putting it delicately?”

The huskiness of her voice brought his head up and he looked across at her. “Compared to some optional phrases, that’s pretty delicate, yeah.”

“Okay.”

“Roark tells her he loves her.”

“Does he mean it?”

“At that moment? With all his heart.”

Parker’s somber face caused her to laugh. “I’m sure. How does Leslie respond?”

“Ah,” he said, frowning. “As it turns out, the hand job is her going-away present. She dumps him.”

“Then and there?”

“It’s right here in black and white.”

“Hmm. Does she break up for the reasons stated in the first draft?”

“Yeah.”

“Then she’s being kind, isn’t she? And smart. As much as it hurts her, she’s doing what she realizes is best for both of them, especially Roark. She’s thinking first of him and his career.”