Down Too Deep (Dirty Deeds, #4)(26)

I looked into the sleeping face of my daughter, then I let my head fall back against the wood and stared at the picture of Sadie on the wall, making silent promises to her too.





Chapter Seven





JENNA




My gaze drifted from the documents I was reviewing to the phone beside me on the couch, taunting me.

Although the whole out-of-sight, out-of-mind thing hadn’t worked very well either. Up until twenty minutes ago, my phone had been in my bedroom charging and I’d still thought about texting Nathan every five minutes or so. I was incredibly distracted today.

It was Wednesday, his first full day home with Marley. I was happy Nathan was getting to spend more time with his daughter, but I couldn’t deny how off I was feeling myself.

I missed her. I’d spent ten straight days with Marley, bonding with her and watching Oliver and Olivia do the same. We’d fallen into a routine together. A routine I loved. And it didn’t matter how prepared I could’ve been for this time apart. Even though I’d see her bright and early in the morning and we’d have most of Saturday together as well, I still couldn’t shake this feeling. I was practically crawling in my skin. I’d never wanted to send a text so badly before in my life.

Just one. What was the big deal? One text to see how it was going. And possibly a follow-up asking Nathan if he needed any help today. That would be it though.

No. I jerked my hand back before it curled around the device. Don’t do it. Don’t do it. Just let them be.

“It’s so quiet in here,” Olivia said, peering up from her iPad to look around the living room. She sighed dramatically and dropped her head against the cushion.

“Way too quiet,” Oliver echoed. His gaze remained laser-focused on his DS screen.

My mouth twitched. It appeared I wasn’t the only one missing our new normal.

“Do you guys want to play Jenga?” I suggested. That game was noisy enough.

“No,” they answered in unison.

“Do you want to go outside? I can work outside.”

“There’s nothing to do.” Oliver hit a button on his device and then turned his head to look at me. “It’s not like at Nate’s house, Mom. We can do everything there. We got the beach. We can play basketball…”

“Kickball,” Olivia added excitedly. “Remember when we played kickball the other day, Ollie? That was awesome.”

“I can take you guys to the park if you want to play kickball,” I said.

“It won’t be the same.” Olivia pouted, sinking lower onto the couch.

“How about a board game? I can play with you…”

Two heads shook in synced twin-rhythm.

Olivia shuffled closer to her brother until they shared the same cushion and whispered loud enough for me to hear, “What do you think Marley’s doing right now?”

I grinned at my lap.

Oliver snorted. “Probably being crazy. I bet she’s running around. Wait.” He sat up, narrowed his eyes at the clock on the wall, and then slumped backward again. “She’s asleep. It’s her nap time.”

“Oh, yeah, I knew that,” Olivia returned.

“She should wake up soon. Then she’s gonna want to eat. You know I’m right, Livvy.”

“Do you guys want a snack?” I asked.

“No,” Oliver answered, while his sister said, “I’m not hungry.”

I wasn’t really hungry either, but getting something to eat would occupy my mind. Obviously, work wasn’t doing it for me. Maybe it was time I took a break.

“I think I’ll make myself a little something,” I announced, stacking the documents together and setting them on the coffee table as I slid to the edge of the cushion. Just as I pushed to my feet, the phone beeped with an incoming message. I palmed it and flipped it over on my walk to the kitchen. The name on the screen briefly halted my steps. It was the CupidMatch guy. I’d deleted the app but forgot to erase him from my contacts.

Wanted to see if you were free this weekend to meet up. I’d like to see you.



I momentarily questioned why this guy would even think I was still interested in getting together—I’d thought I made it clear the other night—until I scrolled back and read the last message I’d sent him. I’d only backed out of our previous date, telling him something had come up. I hadn’t mentioned not wanting to reschedule for another time.

Nothing had changed for me. I still felt the same way.

Just as I was about to respond, another text came through across the screen. This one took immediate precedence over Hookup Guy and possibly anyone else who could be texting me right now.

She’s figured out the power she has over me. Took her a whole 5 minutes. I’m not proud.



I pulled out a chair at the table and took a seat, grinning as I typed my response.





Have you bought her a pony yet?

I will if she asks for one. Jesus Christ I hope she doesn’t.

She’s heard the word NO before. Not today. I want her to like me.





I frowned at the screen. God, did he really not know?



She’ll love you even if you tell her NO. I promise.

She’ll love you no matter what.