Defending Jacob(33)
I said, “Hey, Jake, it’s a mistake. It’s some kind of horrible misunderstanding. We’ll work it out, okay? I don’t want you to lose hope. This is just the beginning of the process. There’s a long way to go.”
“I can’t believe it. I can’t believe it. I’m just, like”—he made an exploding sound and with his hands he sculpted a mushroom cloud—“you know? It’s like, it’s like, who’s that guy? In the story?”
“Kafka.”
“No. The guy from, whatsit? The movie.”
“I don’t know, Jake.”
“Where the guy, like, finds out the world isn’t really the world? It’s just, like, a dream? Like a simulation? A computer made it all? And now he gets to see the real world. It’s, like, an old movie.”
“I’m not sure.”
“The Matrix!”
“The Matrix? That’s old?”
“Keanu Reeves, Dad? Please.”
I looked at Laurie. “Keanu Reeves?”
She shrugged.
It was amazing that Jake could be goofy, even now. But he was. He was the same dorky kid that he had been a few hours before—had always been, for that matter.
“Dad, what am I supposed to do?”
“We’re going to fight. We’ll fight this every step of the way.”
“No, I mean, like, not generally. Now. What happens next?”
“There’ll be an arraignment tomorrow morning. They’ll just read the charge and we’ll set bail and you’ll come home.”
“How much is bail?”
“We’ll find out tomorrow.”
“What if we can’t afford it? What happens to me?”
“We’ll find it, don’t worry. We have some money saved up. We have the house.”
He sniffed. He’d heard me complain about money a thousand times. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t do it, I swear. I know I’m not, like, a perfect kid, okay? But I didn’t do this.”
“I believe you.”
Laurie added, “You are perfect, Jacob.”
“I didn’t even know Ben. He was just, like, this kid from school. Why would I do this? Huh? Why? Okay, why are they saying I did this?”
“I don’t know, Jake.”
“This is your case! What do you mean, you don’t know?”
“I just don’t know.”
“You mean, you don’t want to tell me.”
“No. Don’t say that. Jake, do you think I was investigating you? Really?”
He shook his head. “So just for no reason—for no reason—I killed Ben Rifkin? That’s just—that’s just—I don’t know what it is. It’s crazy. This whole thing is totally crazy.”
“Jacob, you don’t have to convince us. We’re on your side. Always. No matter what happens.”
“Jesus.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “This is Derek’s fault. He did this. I know it.”
“Derek? Why Derek?”
“He’s just—he’s like—he gets freaked out by stuff, you know? Like, the littlest things and he freaks out about them. I swear, when I get out, I’m going to f*ck him up. I swear it.”
“Jake, I don’t think Derek could have done this.”
“He did. You watch. That kid.”
Laurie and I exchanged a puzzled look.
“Jake, we’re going to get you out of here. We’ll put up the bail, whatever it is. We’ll find the money. We’re not going to let you sit in jail. But you’re going to have to spend the night here, just until the arraignment in the morning. We’ll meet you at the courthouse first thing. We’ll have a lawyer with us. You’ll be home for dinner tomorrow. Tomorrow you’re going to sleep in your own bed, I promise.”
“I don’t want a lawyer. I want you. You be my lawyer. Who could be better?”
“I can’t.”
“Why not? I want you. You’re my father. I need you now.”
“It’s a bad idea, Jacob. You need a defense lawyer. Anyway, it’s all taken care of. I called my friend Jonathan Klein. He’s very, very good, I promise you.”
He frowned, disappointed. “You couldn’t do it anyway. You’re a DA.”
“Not anymore.”
“You got fired?”
“Not yet. I’m on leave. They’ll fire me later, probably.”
“ ’Cuz of me?”
“No, not ’cuz of you. You didn’t do anything. It’s just the way things go.”
“So what are you going to do? Like, for money? You need a job.”
“Don’t worry about money. Let me worry about money.”
A cop, some young kid I did not know, knocked and said, “Time.”
Laurie told Jacob, “We love you. We love you so much.”
“Okay, Mom.”
She wrapped her arms around him. For a moment he did not move at all, and Laurie stood there hugging him as if she had embraced a tree or a building column. Finally he relented and patted her back.
“Do you know it, Jake? Do you know how much we love you?”
Over her shoulder, he rolled his eyes. “Yes, Mom.”