Cruel Prince (Royal Hearts Academy, #1)(99)
The muscles in my chest draw tight as I stuff a pillow in my mouth and scream so loud my ears pop.
This is all my fault.
I killed him.
I loved him.
I killed him by loving her.
I scream again, louder this time, but just like Liam’s…my screams for help are silent.
The stone-cold truth of the last forty-eight hours seeps into my bones like an aggressive toxin, contaminating my reality.
He’s gone and he’s never coming back.
He didn’t give me a chance to fix it.
He didn’t give me a chance to apologize.
He didn’t give me a chance to prove I could be a good brother.
He didn’t give me a chance to tell him I’d do anything for him.
Including giving her up.
Balling my fists, I punch my skull.
I’m his big brother, I should have been the one he came to.
The one to help him find a different resolution than the one he chose.
Instead, I was the one who caused the pain that ended his life.
I punch my skull again. So hard I become lightheaded.
If I didn’t kick him out of my room.
If I had checked on him before I went to bed.
If I didn’t fall in love with the girl he gave his heart to.
Should’ve. Would’ve. Could’ve.
There are so many, I’m drowning in them.
But not a single damn one of them will bring Liam back.
Nothing will.
Death is a permanent scar that the people left behind are forced to bear.
And suicide a burden you shoulder forever.
The sound of my phone ringing hums in the background and I snatch it off my bed.
Dylan.
It’s always Dylan calling.
I should tell her what happened…tell her what I did, but I can’t.
Liam’s dead, because I was selfish. Talking to her would be the equivalent of spitting on the grave we’ll be burying him in tomorrow.
I miss her.
The metal casing digs into my fingertips as I clench my cell, combatting the urge to talk to her.
I can’t.
Maybe when things aren’t so fucked-up and I’m able to breathe without the overwhelming rush of pain twisting like a knife, we can be friends again.
I throw the phone against my wall and watch as the screen cracks.
If I never kissed her at the dance, Liam would still be alive.
The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.
If Liam hadn’t walked in on us, I would have had a chance to explain everything to him. He wouldn’t have been blindsided and embarrassed.
But that didn’t happen…because someone stole the opportunity from me. Then he poured salt in the wound by laughing and pointing while Liam cried.
They all did.
Adrenaline lights me up like a rocket as I stand.
I look at the clock on my nightstand. School will be out in twenty-five minutes.
I can’t bring Liam back. I can’t fix the part I played in his death.
But there is something I can do.
Something that will dull the pain…and teach someone a lesson they’ll never forget.
“Where are you going?” Cole questions as I run down the stairs.
I take the bat out of the closet in the foyer, the very same one Liam used the other night. “To make him pay.”
The need for vengeance thrums through my chest with every step I take toward the building.
I’m not stupid enough to walk inside and beat the shit out of him. There are too many witnesses.
But I happen to know his mom works all the time and he walks home instead of taking the bus.
I check my watch. The dismissal bell should be ringing any minute now.
As if on cue, I watch hundreds of kids file out of the school.
Most of them are laughing and smiling…no doubt glad the last day of classes are on the horizon.
While they’ll all be celebrating making it through another year tomorrow…I’ll be burying my little brother.
Because of that motherfucking asshole right there.
Pure wrath pulses through my veins as I watch him wave to a few people before heading down the sidewalk…without a care in the world.
Must be nice to have friends.
Other than me and Dylan, Liam didn’t have any.
Because of him.
History. The nickname Tommy gave Liam burns like acid in my throat.
All Liam wanted was to fit in, to feel like he belonged…it’s the reason he forgave Tommy and befriended him even though I warned him not to.
Unfortunately for Tommy, I’m not the forgiving kind.
My footsteps pick up speed as he reaches the end of the block.
A wooded area is coming up ahead. Which means there’s no place he can run…no place he can hide.
Tick tock, fucker. Your time is coming to an end.
I’m going to do things to him that not even his worst nightmares can conjure up.
Euphoria fills me as he pulls out his cell phone and brings it to his ear.
He’s distracted. Perfect.
Without warning, I strike the bat against his back. To my amusement, he simultaneously trips over a crevice in the cement and goes down like a stack of bricks.
I take the opportunity to drag him into the woods, belly down.
“What the fuck?” he yells, clawing at the dirt and branches. “Somebody help!”