Cruel Magic (Royals of Villain Academy #1)(46)

“Shut up,” I muttered, which was the cleverest retort I could come up with while my nerves were still scraped raw. Then, to my relief, the light switched off for the final session.





When I got back after Desensitization, I shut my bedroom door and braced the desk chair against it for good measure. Then I opened the wardrobe and sat down in front of it. As I tugged open the sock drawer, Deborah squirmed out from between the rolled pairs. She scrambled across them onto my waiting hand.

What did they do to you now, sweetheart? she asked without preamble, her dark mouse eyes peering up at me.

The tenderness in her tone made my throat constrict. It took me a second to speak.

“I just realized that I killed Mom and Dad.”

Deborah made a sound like a snort in my head. What are you talking about? I was there. You did everything you could to help them, putting your own self in more peril than I can really approve of, as admirable as it might have been.

“I know. But I also— If they hadn’t taken me in, the fearmancers never would have attacked them. If they’d never adopted me, they’d still be alive.”

The last words came out ragged. I swallowed hard.

Deborah’s tiny whiskers quivered against my palm. She nuzzled the heel of my hand. That’s hardly the same thing.

“It’s the same end result.”

Do you think they didn’t know the risks? It was their choice to make.

“Because they thought they had to protect the rest of the world from what I might do if they didn’t suppress my powers.”

No. I’d never heard Deborah sound so firm. Listen, Lorelei… I can tell you something that’ll show you what really mattered to your parents. I told you that I was brought on right after you turned fifteen, remember?

“Yeah,” I said. That was just further proof that they’d seen me as some kind of threat.

Well, after they did the whole consciousness transfer, I woke up in this body a little earlier than I think anyone had expected. I heard them arguing with a couple mages from the Conclave who were overseeing the process. The Conclave wanted you to be moved to a more secure location, where several mages could keep an eye on you and your potential fearmancer powers.

A chill rippled down my back. If the other joymancers had felt that way about me back then, how much would it take for them to welcome me back now that my powers had awoken?

“They wanted to treat me like a literal prisoner,” I said.

Deborah tickled my palm with her claws. They were worried. They knew you’d be powerful. At the time, I didn’t realize the heritage you came with. I didn’t tell you about this before because I didn’t want you thinking they’re the enemy.

“It’s not exactly a stretch,” I muttered.

My point is that Rafael and Lisa refused. They fought to keep you with them, to keep raising you as their daughter, because that’s how they saw you. Lisa said it just like that: “She’s our daughter now.” They couldn’t imagine sending you off like some kind of delinquent for something you hadn’t even done. For what your background was. Keeping you in their family for as long as they could mattered more to them than any danger that could come with that decision.

“Oh.” I ran my thumb over her back instinctively, as if she were still my pet mouse and not a person in mouse form. Deborah arched into the touch, so maybe she was mouse enough not to mind. I rubbed the black splotch on her flank. “They really said all of that?”

And a whole lot more. It was a long argument. But obviously they argued it well, because I went back with them to your house where you stayed for the next four years.

The ache inside me wasn’t gone, but the story had eased it a little. I hadn’t imagined the family I’d thought I had. They’d wanted me, risks and all.

I closed my eyes. “Thank you,” I said, curling my fingers around Deborah and tucking her against me in the closest to a hug I could manage.

My fear had been a lie. But then, an awful lot of fears were, weren’t they, no matter what Malcolm had said?

I couldn’t let myself get so wrapped up in this place that I forgot who the real villains were.





Chapter Nineteen





Rory





As Imogen and I came into the dorm room after a dinner in town, Victory and a few of the other girls brushed past us on their way out. Victory’s lips curled into a sharp little smirk. Cressida let her purse smack my arm on her way past, and the girl at the back of the pack tossed over her shoulder, “Sleep well!”

The door shut between us with a mix of giggling and a hissed admonishment. I looked toward my bedroom door with a sinking sensation in my gut.

“Might as well see what the damage is,” Imogen said.

“I thought I had a pretty good lock on the door this time,” I said as we headed over. My abilities obviously weren’t developed enough to stand up to Victory’s yet. It’d probably take a while before they were. Professor Banefield had said she was one of the university’s top students.

The door swung open easily. I braced myself for another stink, but the air smelled clean enough, a hint of freshly mown grass traveling through the window I’d left an inch open. The dim light of the falling evening didn’t catch on anything overtly concerning. I reached over and switched on the overhead light.