Cruel Beauty (Cruel Beauty Universe #1)(23)

“You,” I choked out. “Why couldn’t it have been you?”

Then I fled the room.





7

Finally I stopped in the ballroom that at night was the Heart of Water. My side ached from running and sweat prickled across my face. I sat down heavily and leaned back against the gold-painted wall to stare at the ceiling. Overhead, Apollo leered at Daphne, who fled from him in stylized terror; Persephone’s silent screams looked much more genuine as Hades dragged her down to the underworld. But at least she had a mother who did not rest until she’d saved her.

With a sigh, I pressed my hands against my face. There was a dull, throbbing pain behind my eyeballs; my feet and calves ached too. It occurred to me that I had not walked this much in a long time. Maybe Father should have made me practice marching through the hills as well as drawing Hermetic sigils.

Maybe I shouldn’t have spent so much time worrying about hiding my hatred from Astraia, when clearly it had troubled her so little.

No. No. I should be glad that I had failed to break my sister’s heart. Hadn’t I wished that I could take those words back and return the smile to Astraia’s face? I should be giving thanks to all the gods for receiving such a mercy.

But all I felt was desolation.

I was startled out of my thoughts by a sudden touch against my shoulder.

It was so gentle, for a moment to realize I thought it was a breath of air. Then I looked up and saw Shade hovering against the wall of Heart of Water, again no more than a shadow. The memory of his kisses last night—of me kissing him—rushed back, and I was on my feet in an instant.

“Time for dinner?” I said. I couldn’t think what to do with my hands: if I relaxed them, I looked like a limp doll, if I clenched them, I looked much too tense—

Shade caught one of my wrists and pulled me down the hallway, which solved that part of the problem.

“I must say I’m unimpressed by your master’s hospitality,” I went on, unable to bear the silence a moment longer. “He could have at least provided a map. Or lunch.”

Shade didn’t pause as he drew me forward. From this angle, I couldn’t even see the silhouette of his face, and the words tumbled out as if I were alone.

“Or he could have provided a house that doesn’t shift like a drunken labyrinth, but I suppose that would be too much trouble. Do you think he’s bothered to provide a Minotaur, or is his plan to walk me to death?”

Suddenly I realized how high and whiny my voice sounded. The words shriveled in my throat. Shade had been a prisoner here for who knew how long, a victim of Ignifex’s every whim, and I was complaining that I was tired of walking. As if that mattered.

I couldn’t even bear to look at his silhouette. But I knew I had to apologize, and I drew a shaking breath.

Except then Shade dragged me through the doorway into the dining room and instantly vanished. I was alone. Ignifex wasn’t there yet; the table was arrayed in glinting plates and silverware, but no food.

I dropped into my chair with a thump, my throat tight. Against all odds, I had found an ally. Someone who called me his hope and kissed my hand.

But on my first day, I had accomplished nothing except complaining. He must think me such a selfish child.

With a sigh, I leaned my head down on the table. I’ll search all night, I promised myself. All tomorrow too. But the words sounded hollow even inside my head; now that I knew the scale of this house, I very much doubted I would find the other hearts anytime soon.

Warm lips pressed against the back of my neck.

I bolted upright, arms flailing. Ignifex stood beside my chair, grinning down at me.

“Something wrong?” he asked.

I glared up at him, trying to rub away the phantom sensation of the kiss. “I think you know what, my lord.”

“I suppose I do.” He shrugged and stepped away from me, toward his own seat.

Before I could formulate a reply, the smell of dinner hit me again. Tonight the main dish was stewed beef with apricots. Usually I didn’t like apricots, but I had eaten nothing since breakfast, and at that moment ambrosia couldn’t have smelled better. I picked up my fork and devoured it. Only when I felt a comforting weight in my stomach did I pause and notice that Ignifex was watching me, his mouth crooked in a half smile. No doubt he was amused to see a daughter of the Resurgandi gulping her food like a common peasant.

I set my fork down slowly, wishing I could wipe that smile off his face.

“And where have you been all day?” I asked.

“Roaming the earth and making bargains.” He picked up a glass of wine and swirled it. “Do you want to hear about them?”

“I already know what sort of bargains you make. And you don’t roam the earth, just Arcadia.”

Though it suddenly occurred to me that for all I knew, he did pass between worlds to stand upon the true earth and look up at the true sky.

“Ah, yes, you are a daughter of the Resurgandi. You know of what you have been deprived.” He leaned back in his chair.

“What are you planning?” I asked warily.

“Marriage. Obviously.” He picked up a dish. “Shall I tell you about the girl who bargained away her mother’s eyes, that she might once taste stuffed dates such as these? I can’t say I was sorry when the rabid dogs attacked her.”

“You aren’t sorry about anything you do.”