Cross Her Heart(76)

She’s at the front door when the small voice stops her, and she turns to see Daniel, clutching Peter Rabbit, in the doorway of the sitting room.

‘Where you going, Charrot?’ he asks again. His voice is quiet but not quiet enough.

‘Out.’ It’s a whisper. Irritated. She wants to be gone.

‘I come?’

‘No.’

His chubby face crumples and she sees tears well up in his big eyes and she knows that any minute now he’ll start crying and then Tony will wake up and who knows what will happen.

‘All right,’ she says, shut up shut up don’t cry you little shite, ‘but be quiet.’ Daniel breaks into a joyous grin, all thought of tears forgotten, and does what he’s told and sits carefully on the bottom step and clumsily pulls his shoes on while she gets his blue thrift shop coat that’s too big for him. She tugs his arms into it and then, one finger across her lips, quietly opens the front door and they creep out into the October cold.

Daniel looks as though he could explode with excitement as he holds his hand up, Peter Rabbit tucked under his other arm. She takes his small warm palm in hers and pulls him quickly down the street. She doesn’t want him with her. What will Katie say? Why couldn’t he have stayed where he was? Why does he always have to be the centre of everything?

He’s humming to himself, and sniffing, his nose running, as she eventually slows down to go at his pace and they pick their way across the wasteland, his clumsy feet stumbling occasionally. What if Ma comes back while they’re out? That makes her smile. Tony asleep and Daniel gone would fuck Ma right up. They’d fight then. Let them worry. Go down to the swings and look for him. She can imagine Ma’s panic and Tony’s defensiveness and she wants to laugh and run and get drunk.

They can shite off. All of them.

And there it is. Her anger. She holds on to Daniel’s hand a little tighter.





62


NOW


MARILYN

Finally, finally, we finish. It’s been an interminable morning, and even Simon’s feet were tapping under the table by the end of it. At least he hasn’t planned anything for the afternoon. If I move fast I can be back at the hotel with Lisa in half an hour or so. I grab my bag from under the table and check my phone. There’s a missed call from a number I don’t know. Shit.

‘Do you want to grab some lunch?’ Simon asks. ‘Just to talk. Not work. All this stuff on the news, it’s …’

I hold up my hand to stop him as I hit the message button, gripping the phone to my ear. ‘Sorry, give me a minute,’ I say. The message kicks in. It’s her, Lisa. I listen, and find I’m pacing.

‘Oh my God, oh my God.’

‘What is it?’ Simon’s staring at me. ‘What’s happened?’

‘She knows who Katie is. Jodie’s mum. She knows. She knows where they are!’ I play the message over again. ‘Ava. She knows where Ava is.’ My breath is rapid. She’s being cautious in her message where we were going to run away to, but she knows.

‘Who knows?’

‘Lisa.’

He stares at me, pink blotches appearing on his neck. ‘Lisa? That’s Lisa? You have to call the police.’

‘No, I can’t. It’s not so simple. Look, she found me. Last night. She—’

‘Jesus, Marilyn!’ He steps up close. ‘You’ve seen her?’

Neither of us notice Karen Walsh leaving the room as I start to talk, the events of the past twenty-four hours spilling out of me in a random mess of words. I’m vaguely aware of the door closing but I’m intent on telling him as quickly as possible. I can’t hold it in any longer and I need him to believe us.

‘It wasn’t Lisa who killed Jon and took Ava. The police have got it all wrong. It was Katie Batten. Girl B. She faked her own death in order to find Lisa. They had a pact and Lisa broke it and now she wants some kind of crazy revenge or something …’ I’m breathless as I speak and his eyes get wider.

‘Slow down,’ he says. ‘Katie Batten?’

‘We need to find her.’ I don’t want to talk. I want to get to Lisa. She’s out there alone somewhere. She didn’t wait for me and I can’t blame her for that with her daughter missing, but anything could happen to her. I said I’d help her and I have to. I’m all she has.

‘And we will,’ he says. ‘But you need to explain. Who is Katie Batten?’

‘She was Lisa – Charlotte’s – best friend,’ I start. And then it’s all coming out of me and he listens, without saying a word, as I tell him about their childhood friendship, about how her life was as a child, even about little Daniel’s bruises found after his death and how they crushed Charlotte with the realisation that his short life had been as shit as hers.

I’m still talking when the door opens. We both look up and I see my surprise shining back from Simon’s face.

It’s the policewoman, Bray. Why is she here? Her anger is like a haze around her brisk efficient body as she and the two men with her sweep into the room. She takes my phone from me before I’ve had a chance to speak.

‘Bag it,’ she says, passing it back to a constable. ‘We need to talk to you at the station, and if you refuse, I’ll have no option but to arrest you—’